Chapter Nine

Hayan was left with questions and confusion as he watch Sean ran away like he has some kind of disease. And when he reached the classroom, he immediately talked to their classmates so that he won't approach him. He knows that he doesn't like the crowd so he gathered his classmates and talked to them.

I wonder what's wrong. He's never like this before.

He could feel the awkwardness while they are sitting next to each other. He wanted to ask him what is wrong but he can't seem to say a word.  He's really not the type to confront someone, more like the type to keep it all inside, maybe that's the reason why he has a hard time dealing with people, he's always having a hard time saying what's on his mind.

But it's Sean, his bestfriend since they were kids. He may hate confrontation but he just can't sit idly and let him treat him coldly. He has know what is wrong and they will talk about it. He'll just wait for the right timing.

And so the breaktime came.

"Sean-"

"I need to go!" He quickly stood up and ran outside. He could feel a tight feeling on his chest, his mind filled with endless questions.

Why is he avoiding me? What did I do wrong?

"Hayan." Hajin suddenly appeared before him.

"Do you want to eat together?"

-

His mind is occupied with Sean the entire time he's eating. He should be happy right now because Hajin is eating with him but he can't feel anything right now. He wants to know why his best friend is suddenly avoiding him.

"Are you okay?" Hajin asked his voice full of worry when he saw Hayan looking absent-minded. Hayan only nodded. He feels bad, he should be enjoying this lunch. Hajin must be bored with him right now.

Sean, just what the hell is wrong with you?

"You can tell me, so it won't be that heavy to you... But it's fine if you don't, that might be too personal for me to intervene."

Hayan dropped his spoon and sighed. "Actually, S-sean's been avoiding me. I don't know what happened but he seems to be mad at me. I don't know what's wrong, or if I did something wrong." He ended up venting his frustrations to him.

"There must be a reason why he's acting that way."

"I know... But he could at least tell me. I don't want us to be this way." He lowered his head as he could feel tears forming in his eyes. He hates how emotional he can get.

"Sean is lucky."

"Huh?"

"Sean is lucky he has a friend like you. I'm sure he's not that dumb to let your friendship go to waste to something trivial. I think you just need to give him some time alone." Hajin flashed a smile. "Just trust him, he's your best friend, right?"

Hayan nodded, his mood slightly lifting up. Indeed, Hajin could cheer everyone up.

This is bad. I like him more now.

-

They were on the way back to the classroom when they come across Red.

"Hayan!" Red's smiling face greeted him. "I've been waiting for you."

"Why?"

"Why? Because I want to see you." Red suddenly leaned closer making him flinched. He laughed and stand up straight with his hands both on his pockets. "I just want to say that I came up with a song and I want you to hear it."

Red would always give him the privilege to listen to his composed songs first and they're all good and up to his taste so he would go every time.

"Okay."

His smile grew even wider, his cheeks letting out a slight blush. "Really? I'll see you then." And as a habit, he touched his face before walking away.

Hajin was already inside the classroom. He didn't even notice that he left him there. He feels guilty, it's as if he just ignored him for another person.

But isn't that what you did? Everytime Red is there, you ignore Hajin. He sighed. It's not that. I hope he doesn't misunderstand. We only started to become friends. I want it to last for a long time.

He stopped walking when he saw Sean sitting on his chair and sleeping. He doesn't really know if he's really sleeping or he's just pretending. Slowly, he walked towards him and sat beside him.

He saw him flinching when he moved the chair to sit down.

So he's not asleep. He just don't want to see me. He glanced at him for a while, his eyes visible with sadness.

I don't know what's wrong but I'll give you time and I'll wait for you. Just don't do it for too long or I will get sad for real.

-

"So, what do you think?" Red asked after the song ended. Their class has ended and they're now at the music room. The song's not yet finished, in fact it's only a minute long but Hayan could feel the sadness of the song. He could feel his chest tightening. He didn't know it was possible to feel that emotion through a song.

"It's really... Good." He said sincerely. Red's mouth curved into a smile. "You're really good, Red. But..."

"It's sad, right?" Red said, continuing his words. "Do you know what it means?" He shake his head. "It's when you like someone but he doesn't like you back. That's why it's sad."

Red suddenly laid on his shoulder making him flinch. "I honestly don't think I can ever finish that song. And if I did, I'll probably die from sadness."

"Red, what are you-"

"You're this close to me and yet you're so far." He whispered as he traced his chin through his finger. "I really hate sadness but you are the reason why I'm sad so I don't really mind it." He then moved away and fixed his guitar.

"I'm sorry..." He whispered but enough for him to hear. Hayan knows how sad it is to have an unrequited love. He likes Hajin for a long time now and he could only look at him from a far. They maybe close now but as Red said, he still feels he's so far away. No matter how he extend his hand, he won't be able to reach Hajin.

"Why are you sorry? I'm not giving up on you, Hayan. I will ask you everyday until you say yes. So, I don't want to hear that apology. I don't need your pity, I'm already sad enough." He put away the guitar back to its place.

"Let's go, I'll take you home."