Chrisanna
Which message? My eyes widen at his question. Meanwhile, before I could say anything else, Kylee comes inside with Zoey. Zoey meows at me right away, jumping onto my lap. "She missed you", Kylee pets Zoey's head as I smile, rubbing her fluffy furry torso."Wait!" Samuel husks. As my gaze drifts back to him, he gawks at us in disbelief. "What's this?" he scoffs, narrowing his thick eyebrows in annoyance. I look at Zoey before focusing back on Samuel again. "This? This is a dinosaur with lots of furs and fluff"Samuel throws me a blank look. "I didn't know you had never seen a cat before in your life, Samuel", I gasp under my breath as Zoey snuggles to me. Kylee cracks up. "I can see, it's a cat. But why is it here?" he shrugs."First of all, she's a female cat. So, stop saying 'it'. Call her 'she' And her name is Zoey. Cute no?"Samuel rolls his eyes. "Okay. But it— why is she here?""Because I'm here""Why are you even here?" he grunts with a voice of frustration.I totally ignore him and look back at Zoey. She looks so upset right now. "Hey, sweet girl, it's okay. He didn't mean that. Actually, he's still going through the trauma he's married already", I tell Zoey and she meows.Kylee bursts into laughter again when Samuel keeps shooting me death stares."Kylee, shut up!" Samuel screeches, making her mum. "Stop laughing and go from here now""Fine. But don't argue much. Mom will get to know", Kylee sighs walking out of the room.Right after that, Samuel looks back at me. "She can't stay here!" he says again. "Why?""Because I don't want a mess""Oh? Why would you think that I would listen to you? I can't leave my pet just because you have a problem. And this is not your house either""But the room is mine", Samuel again takes a step closer to me. It's like a turn-off button for everything for me when the distance between us is insanely less. I suck the air under my breath and take a step back. Why does he always gaze at me as if he's gonna eat me up right away?"Fine. She won't be in your room", I let out a breath that I was holding. "Fair enough", he shrugs and walks towards the closet and I find it better to set up a place for Zoey.* Emmy helped me to make a place for Zoey downstairs. Even though I know she is used to staying with me, I can't force Samuel to keep her in there. Everything should be a mutual decision when we have to stay together."Chrissie!" Kylee halts me in the corridor when I was moving towards my room. "Yeah. What's up?" I ask.Kylee gulps down nervously. "I heard you talking to Samuel about the message", she mutters. "How do you know about the message?" I exclaim. "Chrissie, listen", she grabs my wrist and whispers. "I know that was a stupid move. But— I sent that message to you"My jaw drops due to utter shock. "What did you do?""I sent the message. I had Samuel's phone at that time and I did it", she says, lowering her eyes.I can't believe it. "Kylee! Why did you do that?""Because I didn't want anyone else to be my sister-in-law", she shrugs."What? Kylee, that makes no sense", my voice becomes louder as she presses my hand."Please don't tell Samuel about it. I know I made a mistake. But I didn't want you to call the wedding off. You and Samuel look so good together. I wanted to protect my brother from some bitches I don't even know. You were perfect", she says.I sigh.Typical teenagers!I have no words to say. Her foolish act literally got me into trouble. "You understand that Samuel thinks it all happened because of me?" I seethe. "That was so immature of you, Kylee. You can't decide who your brother should get married to or not. You should change the way of your think otherwise, you'll end up being toxic to everyone"As I slam her in utter frustration, she remains silent, lowering her eyes."I'm sorry, Chrissie. I didn't—""I don't wanna talk about it now", I gasp. "And don't worry. I'm not telling him anything", saying, I surge back to the room. When I get inside, I already find Samuel freshened up. He's only wearing a trouser with no upper clothes on which reveals a giant tattoo on his forearm. Once he told me he would get a tattoo when he'll be eligible to get one. He was so passionate about that."When I'll get one, you'll be the first one whom I'll show it to", Samuel's old words echo inside my head with his softest giggle. I didn't know I had been staring at him until he turns to me. Hesitated, I look away immediately, tucking my hair behind my ear. "You really put your clothes next to my clothes?" he shrugs, slamming the door of the closet shut. "Yes", I stutter. "What do you want me to do then?""Let me breathe", he fires back at me, sliding a red t-shirt down to his robust torso which is still wet, water drops dripping down. Jesus! I'm really watching him in such detail!"I didn't stop you from breathing", I snarl."Find some other place for your clothes""I won't", I cross my arms, striding towards the bed and slumping onto it— just in front of him. He stares down at me with that typical ruddy gaze. "Yes. I won't. Because you have to share everything with me from now on. Accept that, Samuel. Because no matter what the circumstances were, we got married. And I'm not taking it as a joke. You have to share your closet, your room, your bed, your washroom, everything with me. Because again, this marriage isn't a joke to me. I don't want any terms and conditions because I do want to make it work. When I took those vows, straight looking into your eyes, I meant that""I meant that too", he snarls, interrupting me midway.My eyes halt at him for a second as he slightly looks away."I'm a believer!" he tells me as if he wants to make it clear that those vows mean to him only because he's a believer."So am I. I'm a regular church goer", I tell him. "That's why I'm saying we should stop fighting and you should stop sulking around. Because we are both at fault. If we're stuck together, it's not only because of me, or only because of you. Our stupidity made this happen. So, just accept what happened and move on. We can't split. You know that. For our families"My voice softens in the end. Even though I'm mad at Kylee, I can't fully blame her. We had all the time to stop it from happening but we kept pushing it away. That was our stupidity.Samuel shrugs, nodding after a long moment of silence. * I come out after taking a long shower and finally getting rid of the wedding dress. I have put on an oversized top with my short pyjamas. My entire body is itching right now. Samuel is already lying on the other side, gratefully leaving some space for me. His eyes are closed. My subconscious automatically takes the chance to properly look at him yet again. I wonder if he even tried to look at me properly like that. I don't understand his harshness towards me. We were so good back then with so many unknown beautiful feelings embracing us until he suddenly left it all behind. I could never know the reason. I didn't think I had the right to ask him either. In so many years. Maybe, now, I have that right. I gulp down my heart beating faster. And you were bravely telling him to share a bed! I yell at myself inside my head. I hesitantly scoot onto the bed and slide inside the blanket. The bed is big enough so I keep much distance between us before closing my eyes.I'm so tired after the entire day of rush that my eyes feel heavy. Sleep almost emerges when I feel something heavy on my torso. I can barely open my eyes due to exhaustion. However, I can feel a whiff of cosy breath fanning my skin. It's Samuel. He's so damn close right now. I part my eyes open, discovering his face near my chest as he has literally covered the space between us with his giant hand laying over my stomach. My breath hitches as I stare at him sleeping peacefully. It takes me back to the moment when we fell asleep in school. We were locked in the maintenance closet and had to sleep closer to each other. He couldn't keep himself organized while sleeping and his hands and legs kept coming all over me. That was the first time I slept next to a guy, the only time. And crazy enough, it's again him. And maybe, it'll always be him from now. I didn't realise I had been smiling the whole time while staring at him and recalling those days. It doesn't feel bad though. I close my eyes, my exhausted body giving up for the night.* That's a weird sound. I squirm onto the bed half asleep as I hear the sound of something— maybe, breathing. Someone is breathing. Heavily! It takes my brain a while to process after waking up in the middle of the night. Through a thin light of moonlight coming from the window, I can barely see anything. But Samuel is awake. He is seated on the bed, breathing heavily."Samuel!" I call him but he doesn't respond. "Samuel", I call him again, louder this time. He doesn't reply this time either."Can't you sleep?" I ask, confused but soon enough as my vision clears, I realise he's shaking.Alarmed, I get up right away and sit closer to him. His eyes dart aimlessly at nowhere as his breathing gets faster."Sam— Samuel?" my voice comes out terrified as I hold his arm. "What's wrong?""Get back to sleep!" he groans, still huffing. "But what's wrong with you?" I exclaim."Get. Back. To. Sleep. Chrisanna!" His fierce voice makes me shudder from the core as I take my hand off him.I won't deny that it scared the shit out of me. I'm concerned yet scared to ask him anything further. Pushing myself back to the bed, I turn around, drifting to the edge and close my eyes tightly. I don't think I'll be able to sleep properly after this. * I did sleep last night. Thanks to my tired body which dominated my disturbed mind. It's seven in the morning and I'm lying on the bed. Alone. It's been ten minutes since I woke up but Samuel didn't show up. I get to know he has gone somewhere when I check my phone and find a text from him. "Sorry if I scared you last night"My sanity is unable to comprehend anything. It feels like I have known him for so long and I still don't know a single friction of him well.Samuel is like an ocean. No matter how deep I dive into him, I can't get past a point and more than half of him just remains a mystery to me just like the ocean is still the biggest mystery to humankind.Samuel "Denial is normal. Having no clue what to do is normal. You don't understand why you're doing a certain thing. It's fine. Everything makes sense as long as you accept yourself, your emotions, and your decisions. Acceptance is the key. God accepts you, understands your dilemma and you also SHOULD"I lock my phone and take my AirPods out after turning the podcast off. Summer has finally arrived and I didn't realise that until I landed in Texas. It's still colder in Melbourne. It's always cold over there, at least to me. The warmth is missing which I always feel in Texas. For eight years, I was away from this warmth. I am scared of it, even though I like it. I'm scared of light, sunshine and zeal. Over the years, it only got worse. I look at my phone. It's already eight. Sitting on the wooden bench, I watch the unknown faces cheerfully jog around to start a better day. And I'm here to start a day without the expectation of any change. I get onto my feet and put on the hood of
Samuel Kylee is glaring at me in the hope of hearing an explanation—an explanation that likewise confuses me. Indeed, I had no desire to marry Chrisanna. It was a guilty pleasure that I was running from. Yet, I recall the absurd dilemma I was in yesterday when I received her message. My stomach dropped and I typed that message out of nowhere. I still don't know why I did that and I don't want her to ever find that out."Samuel, I'm talking to you", Kylee screeches, dragging me back to my senses.A sigh of distress escapes me as I look at her. "Listen, little bug", I touch her cheek. "I'm really sorry you had to take this blame for me. But this is the first time I have asked for something. From you"Her raging eyes gradually cool down as she blinks at me, nodding."You can at least do that for me""I can", she looks at me with her confusion-filled eyes. "But I can't understand why you did it. If you truly wanted to marry her then—""No", I snap, stuttering the next moment. "I never
Chrisanna "Ms Corinna wants a beach-themed shoot. She emailed me last night", Phoebe tells me as I scatter all the pictures of some locations from different angles. "Great! She has a shoot scheduled for tomorrow. How are we going to get the location ready in less than 24 hours?" shrugging, I toss the notepad at Derek's face. Accidentally. "Sorry, Derek!" I scoff. "Go and pick up the goods soon as possible. I'll have to shut down before the afternoon"Derek fixes his hair which was definitely not that affected by his face getting slammed."Miss C, are you okay?" he groans."Derek, it'll be better if you pay attention to your internship rather than my mood!" I snarl at the nineteen-year-old boy as he nods and walks straight out of the room. Paxton and Mayla scramble to return to their work as my gaze falls on them.When I'm working, I'm never in a bad mood. I enjoy working and am not rude to my coworkers. However, I have been unable to maintain a positive attitude since my marriage.
Chrisanna Samuel's eyes fix on me without any movement as I make the pillow bridge again. He rolls his eyes and looks away as if he's done with me. I'm so tired of this attitude when he acts like I'm getting on his nerves. I set a pillow against the headboard and lean against it, holding my tablet as I focus on making a theme board for my next shoot. I hear him opening the closet but don't give much attention to it, instead, I hold my focus on the tablet. It takes me a while to balance all the colour palettes with the dress code. I finished a lot of stuff in one sitting and finally exhale a sigh of relief, closing the tablet.Surprised, I find Samuel still digging inside the closet. He throws his clothes on the bed and again folds them. I realise he didn't come to bed and he had been near the closet for forty minutes straight.Don't talk to him.Don't call him.I shouldn't care. I keep ranting this to myself. However, I can't ignore the anxious look on his face."Samuel!" I call h
Chrisanna "Sorry?" I shake my head, wondering if I have misheard her."You'll be reporting Mr Samuel Vance, Chrisanna", Nicole repeats with a teasing smile lingering on her face. Of course, she's the only one from this office who attended the wedding and knows about it. "Wow!" Nancy exclaims and I pinch her under the desk to keep her mouth shut.I'm freaking out over here. "Nicole, me? I'm just halfway through my internship. I'm not even ready yet""You are, Chrisanna. You're much better than you think you are. Trust me", she says and looks at her wristwatch. "I'll come to escort you to B corp in an hour. All the best"Nicole surges away after giving me a mini panic attack. "Damn, you're lucky!" Kizzy scoffs. "But what will you do with this luck? You have a fiance""And you are too boring to play around", Nancy groans."Shut up, you two", snarling, I come out of my desk and walk faster towards paa's cabin.* "Come in"I come inside with my heart still pounding against my chest."G
Chrisanna I knock at the door, preparing myself for all the cold gestures I might be getting. "Come in!" his hoarse voice literally gives me chills all the damn time. I push the door and come inside, discovering him in a huge stack of files. His eyebrows are drawn together."So, what do you want me to address you?" he asks. "Ms Scott or Mrs—?" he doesn't complete.That was a strange question."I would prefer my first name instead. Chrisanna is fine. Because I'm definitely not a Ms I don't want anyone to know I'm married and even if I do, I won't probably change my surname ever"I had this always in my mind. There's no way I'm changing my surname. I made my identity with this name and it'll always be the same."Fair enough", Samuel says, finally lifting his eyes at me. "Sit down"I pull the chair and sit in front of him."Okay, I still to understand the ongoing projects", he says, quite normally. "So, I want you to fix my appointment with all the clients we're dealing with right now,
Samuel I peek into Kylee's room. Seems like she's sleeping. I tried to call Chrisanna but she blabbered something and cut the call. She's already wasted and I don't think I'll be able to hold myself anymore. I need to know where she is."She's in the opera club", Kylee's head pops out from the door, startling me and she closes the door in my face without hearing me out. Without delay, I rush out of the manor and keep calling her. This woman is impossible. The other day she was asserting her so-called rights and today, she didn't even bother to inform me that she would be going to a club as if she has all the damn rights and I don't have any. Driving at full speed, I reach the opera club which isn't far from the manor. It's a small space with a hundred people stuffed inside a shack. I keep my face mask and hat on while looking for her in the mild disco lights. Thankfully, the music isn't as loud as the bars.I look at each of the faces while crossing the crowd until I hear a chirpin
Chrisanna I wake up with the alarm clock going off, only to feel my head terribly aching and find it hard to push my eyelids up. I groan, rolling onto my stomach as I recollect some blurry visuals. Whenever I'm drunk, I can hardly sleep. Most of the time, I wake up for nanoseconds and doze off again. I remember each time I opened my eyes in the middle of the night, I saw Samuel sleeping underneath me. It might be a hallucination. My eyes flare up as soon as my head is filled with all the broken memories from last night and I jump off the bed, horrified."Shit! I'm screwed!" I groan. I don't know how much I blabbered last night. And I never wanted to be emotional in front of him, I never wanted him to know that his behaviour affects me. But I clearly remember what I had done. I told him that I missed him, his words hurt me, and not the least, I was acting like a totally whipped woman.The most embarrassing part was when I suddenly woke up in the middle of the night, feeling terribly