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Chapter 72
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BroKen Chapter 1
Kerry laid across her lonely bed feeling listless and sorry for herself. That's the way it has been for the past three months or so. No matter how much she told herself that today was the day she was going to get up and get moving, she just could never find the energy to do much more than pick her head up off her pillow. Today, she didn't even have it in her for that. Why bother? What was the point? She had nothing to live for, or if she did, she couldn't think of it in that moment of melancholy. She fought back unwanted tears as she rolled over to look at the opposite wall. It was the same every morning when she opened her eyes first thing. The debilitating and almost crippling pain that seemed to grow stronger with each new day. She never imagined that a person could feel such despair and still survive. She hadn't seriously contemplated taking her own life, but there were moments when she wondered what pain was worse than the one she now suffered that led so many down that road
BroKen Chapter 2
She'd sat there like a lump as he laid out their life, the life they'd shared, as seen through his eyes. There was no mention of the double shifts and extra jobs she'd done to put him through medical school. There was no recall of the blood, sweat, and tears she'd put into their relationship. It was as though the years together, the shared dreams, the late-night plans for their future as they ate Ramen noodles out of Cool Whip containers had all disappeared into thin air. Where had he been, this stranger that spoke in hushed tones to his lawyer each time the judge asked a question? Had he not been right there with her throughout those years of hardship and turmoil? When she'd been the one shouldering the burden? Where was the man who'd been so full of gratitude and praise for her? The one who'd promised her the world one day? Instead, he'd stomped all over her heart and destroyed her self-esteem with his claims that she had done nothing really to contribute to what he had beco
BroKen Chapter 3
She'd even sunk so low as to hang around outside her old home, the home she'd barely had time to enjoy before being ousted. Having the cops cart you away in handcuffs because your replacement felt threatened by you hanging around her home as she carried the child that was by all rights supposed to be yours was about as horrifying an ordeal as she could've imagined. That had been the last time she'd tried. The humiliation coupled with the restraining order had finally put the nail in that coffin. And if she hadn't exactly moved on, she'd withdrawn. She'd had to accept after all the knocks that her life was gone. The life she'd mapped out for herself had become nothing more than a tainted dream. It had come to light after all was said and done that the affair was a well-known fact among their circle of friends. Everyone knew except the gullible unsuspecting fool who had put her life on hold for the man she thought was the love of her life and she his. He'd even talked her into putt
BroKen Chapter 4
She'd shared her hopes and dreams, her fears, all of it with him. He knew what being left behind meant to her and had promised never to desert her the way everyone else had. Words had been her only solace on those days when life became too much when her reality became a dark hole that she couldn't seem to climb out of. Even with Paul in her life back then as a young teen, she'd had her writing to keep her sane. She relived the memories as she went through the box now. Taking out the hundreds of stories she'd written over the years. Some of them had been pretty good now that she thought of it, and she cussed Paul in her mind for yet another dream of hers that he'd stolen. Why was it only now that she so clearly saw just what a selfish prick he was? Why hadn't she had this insight years ago before she'd wasted her youth on his undeserving ass? He'd stolen her life, taken away her every reason for being. Everything she'd found joy in he'd squashed in some way, or another, if
BroKen Chapter 5
Getting up from the floor, she took the box with her back to the kitchen, where she made herself another pot of coffee and prepared to dig in. For the first time, in too long to remember, she felt half alive and hoped the feeling last. She was tired of looking at the back end of despair, time for some light and laughter, even if it was with the people she created in her own mind. It was another few hours before she came up for air. Going back over what she'd written, she felt the first real sense of hope since her world had unraveled. Sitting there at the ratty old table, she felt empowered and accomplished with her small victory. You see, all is not lost. There's still a little piece of you in there. She read it over again to be sure, and it still flowed well. Something was forming in the pit of her gut that told her maybe life was about to change. That maybe her days of crying on the bathroom floor were at an end. "This is pretty good stuff, Kerry girl." She felt a flutter o
BroKen Chapter 6
The next day, before she could lose her nerve, she got up early and got ready for her walk of shame. Everyone knew what had happened to her and though she was sure not all of them were actually laughing at her behind their hands, she was pretty sure the ones who weren't were pitying her, and she wasn't sure which horrified her more. She pushed those negative thoughts aside as best she could as she drank her second cup of coffee. After rinsing the cup and putting it to drain, she headed to the bathroom to add the finishing touches to her appearance. The fact that she even cared was a good sign as far as she was concerned. It had been a while. In her jeans that now fit a little looser around the hips, but fell just right enough to be considered fashionable, and a nice halter top she'd had stuffed into the back of her closet, promising herself she would work up the nerve to wear one night to wow Paul, she checked herself out in the mirror. She certainly hadn't lost any weight in
BroKen Chapter 7
"Er, excuse me, gotta go." She'd lost her damn mind that's it. All the pressure from the last few months had finally made her crack and that's why she was standing on a sidewalk salivating over the very well proportioned schlong of a complete stranger. She had never in her life done such a thing, what in the world had possessed her? Sure he was the hottest thing she'd ever seen outside a TV screen, but still. She wasn't the type to act in such a way. What must he think of her? She knew he'd caught her, oh damn. But funnily enough where the old Kerry would've run in mortal shame, the new one wouldn't mind another peek. Good grief. You'd think she'd learned her lesson. What happened to all those private vows she'd made to herself, never to even look at a member of the opposite sex again in this lifetime? It took her a moment to realize he hadn't moved out of her way to let her pass since she'd gotten tangled up in her own head. "You're absolutely gorgeous." Her eyes bugged out o
BroKen Chapter 8
She followed the old lady into her quaint little house not quite sure what to make of this turn of events. The house was pretty much what you would expect the house of an elderly woman living alone to look like. There were pictures on the walls and every other surface in the front room, most of them of a young man in an army uniform from about the early forties. She was pretty sure it was the late Mr. Thompson who had passed a few years earlier. There were others of younger people as well, the children and grandchildren most likely. There was bric-a-brac with knickknacks, doilies on everything and crocheted afghans thrown over the backs of chairs. It was homey and nice and made her miss her gran who'd been gone for eight years now. The memory of the old woman who'd been so good to her brought fresh tears to her eyes. She was glad her gran hadn't been around to see the mess she'd made of things though, at least that was one thing she could be grateful for. That her grandparents
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