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Cyrus was sitting at his designated seat, and his teacher left the students when she was done giving some school work to her students and smiled at me when she reached where I was standing outside Cyrus's room.

"Hi, sorry for waiting too long, but can we talk at my office?" I nod politely and walk behind Cyrus's teacher until she opens the office door.

I sat in the chair, watched her every move, and prepared some coffee.

"Miss Cruz, I know that you're aware of the situation. Unfortunately, the damage of what Cyrus did is considerable, and there is a possibility that the principal will kick him off to this school." I gasped and looked straight at Cyrus's teacher.

"Come on, I heard that my child is the victim here, that his classmates bullied him many times, and this is the very first time that he fought back, isn't it unfair?" I said and showed my disappointment to the teacher of my child.

"I'm sorry, but I am also a worker here, and the family of the child that Cyrus punched is related to the principal of this preschool." I stand up and walk for a bit to calm myself, but it doesn't help.

How can they do this to a child who is a victim of bullying? My son, I know he will endure anything. He is a sweet boy and can't stand to see a girl who got bullied.

"Fine, I'll leave, but remember that one day, I hope you won't experience what my kid feels end experienced." I walked away and went to his room of Cyrus, he was waiting outside his room, and when he saw me, my son started to cry and hugged my thighs.

"I am sorry, Mama." I lifted Cyrus and hugged him tight, patting his back to calm him.

"No, you didn't do anything bad. I am proud that you protected a girl who is also a bullying victim. Mama will give you what you deserve, so calm down now, and Mama is not angry." I kept walking until I reached the parking lot, and my son was still crying in the passenger seat.

I start the car engine I borrowed from my parents, I have an appointment with the strip club, and I'll transfer my son to a homeschool. I don't want him to get affected by a simple incident.

My son kept sobbing beside me, and he stopped crying when the car went to the drive-thru of McDonald's. He smiles and looks at the menu.

"Mama, can I have a happy meal, so I will be happy now?" I pinched his nose and ordered some food, Cyrus deserves a treat, and even if this is all I can do to ease the pain, I will do it.

When I saw my son, I fell in love with Cyrus and promised to be a great mother to him, even if I would destroy myself.

I am destroyed from the day I broke up with his father, and as long as I am alive, I'll give him all that I can provide.

"Thank you, ma'am." I accepted the paper bag and gave the happy meal to Cyrus. He eats joyfully in the passenger seat while I am on my way to my parent's house, I will drop him off there for a while, and once the interview with the strip club is done and I get hired, I need to find someone where my son can stay at night.

My parents, that's my last hope, and I hope they won't decline it because I have no funds to hire a babysitter.

When I entered the street of Hustle, I saw my mom watering the flowers in her mini garden, and when she saw the car parked, my mother waved her hand to Cyrus.

I got out of the car and lifted Cyrus. My mother didn't even look at me and hugged Cyrus.

"I will leave him for a while, and he will be enrolled in homeschooling. That is the best for him as of now." My mother looked at me and frowned.

"He got bullied because of you. If you take care of Cyrus, he won't experience this kind of pain at a very young age." Mother walks away while Cyrus is eating some nuggets in her arms.

I am alone in the garden. I know my mother is mad at me even though many years have passed, and they won't forgive me. Mother and father accepted Cyrus, but not me.

I returned to the car with disappointment and chest pain, lighting the cigar while driving. 

In the middle of driving, my mind kept playing some familiar sounds that I will never forget, the voice of the only man that caught my heart.

His rough voice calms me down, and he knows how to help me when I am in chaos. I know I need to forget him and my feelings for him because I only decided from the beginning.

I initiated the break-up with him, and he's happy with his fiance, getting wealthier daily.

He may be my lover before, but he will never be my future.

I am crying because of my decision. It's me. I am the problem from the beginning up into the present.

Now, I am haunted by the memories of my past, which leaves a significant impact on my life because I know that I will never feel that kind of love no matter where I find it with different people.

It's a long drive for me, and more than a cigarette box will be needed for this long drive.

. . .

I look at my body figure in the mirror; the strip club manager is clapping while praising my body.

"Your body is perfect. Are you sure you have a child?" she joked, and I smiled politely. I feel uncomfortable with what I am wearing now. I think people will sexualize me even if I do nothing. But I chose this, and the moment they saw me, they wanted me to start a practice for three days, interact in the VIP rooms, and serve drinks.

After a week, once I know how to dance at the pole, they will dispatch me on the stage.

"Let's apply some heavy makeup and curl your hair, god. You looked like a goddess," the makeup artist kept praising me while applying some makeup.

I know that I'll get used to this. Soon, because if this is the only way for me to earn a lot of money, I'll do it and have no choice.

Is this really who I am? Because I can't even recognize myself, but this is all I can do. I've been destroying myself since I decided to give up everything and choose this way of living, and somehow, I don't deserve to feel this kind of sadness.

I sound a hypocrite, and I find it funny the woman who left everything started to regret that.

"There, your makeup and hair are done!" She pointed out the mirror in front of me, clapping on the result of my makeup and hair.

"I am sure you will get a big tip tonight, even though this is your first day!" I smile shyly and stand up, looking at my body and back. I can't recognize myself tonight. I am a different person tonight.

"Thank you for your service." I bowed and followed the manager on her way to the private room.

"These four rooms, I will assign this to you tonight. All you gotta do is refill the bucket of beer or alcohol. If a customer wants your service, like an exclusive escort, ring the bell, and the other employees will assist you in different rooms," she explained, and I nodded at her explanation. My hands are shaking while holding the menu.

"Good luck on your first day, don't forget to keep your smile while working; you can't even roll your eyes or raise your voice at customers, okay?"

"Yes, I get it. Thank you for guiding me." She patted my shoulder before leaving me in the hallway. 

There are no people in the rooms where I got assigned, and I decided to light some cigars first while there's no customer now.

I saw the room light go green, and I walked to the occupied room. And I saw a man with a tuxedo, his necktie was loose, and he looked wasted now.

"Hi, it's good to see you, Sir. May I know your order?" I gave him the menu, and he looked at me. His eyes locked with mine, and he slowly reached the menu and read each alcoholic beverage.

"C7 and a pack of cigars." I nodded and turned away, but he spoke again.

"And I want you to be my escort while I drink." I nodded slowly, rang the bell, gave his order to the server, and returned to the deluxe rooms.

I sat beside him and offered the lighter to light his cigar, and he gladly accepted it, and my other hand was holding a cigar.

"You're new here, right?" He looked at me while asking. "Yes, I got hired lately, and they insist on starting tonight." I blew the cigar, and he nodded while still looking at me.

My hands shake while reaching for his hand, but he avoids my hand.

"No, I don't like touching some woman without her consent, even if she's working at the strip club. That is why I am here in the deluxe room," he explained, and I felt like I was getting eaten alive with embarrassment.

"Sorry, I thought you wanted it," I said and looked away.

"No, it's not that I don't want to get touched by a woman, but if you don't want to, I won't force you," he politely said, and I poured the brandy for him.

"I am tired at work, and when I drink alone at home, I just get more frustrated." He laughed and took a sip at the brandy I gave him.

"Same thought, when I am drinking alone, instead of getting relaxed, my thoughts are getting relevant, and even in my sleep, I keep thinking the same scenario." He's watching me talk and chuckle.

"We have similarities, and maybe that's why I got comfortable and at ease when I saw you." He shrugged his shoulder and drank another shot of brandy.

"Why do you work here at a strip club, aside from your need to earn money?" He was looking at me when he asked it.

I automatically smile when I remember why I am working hard, sacrificing my happiness, because of my son.

"I have a better plan for my son; he deserves a good life." He smiles back at me and offers a cigar.

I can't believe this kind of conversation with strangers will be this comfortable.

He is friendly and respectful in this kind of place where men are hungry for women.

"You're a good mother, and I won't judge you for your decision." I nodded, poured the brandy into the glass he was holding, and lit my second stick of cigar.

"Don't worry, I'll always ask for your assistance at the strip club. What's your name?" I looked at him while he was drinking the brandy.

"Belle," I said, and he nodded slowly. "And I am Hance. It's nice to meet you here, Belle." He extended his hand for a handshake and accepted it while smoking.

"Can I vent out my feelings?" He said while looking at the brandy in his glass. He looked problematic and stressed now. His tired expression seems like he is having a bad day.

"Sure, anything for you," I answered truthfully and poured another shot of brandy.

"So, I have this situation where people keep pressuring me because my brother, who is the firstborn of my father to his legitimate family, is getting richer day by day, and people keep on comparing him to me. I have my own life and path that I am taking at my journey, and different from my brother, I feel tired every day to keep up with their high expectations that are hard to meet." He put down the glass and touched his forehead.

"I know what it feels like to see people around you get disappointed by their high expectations, and you can't keep up because of them too." He quickly looked at me and chuckled.

"You got it, that is what I have been through now, and it sucks that even if it makes me drained, I still continue on the things that didn't make me happy at all." I can clearly see how tired he is, and I feel bad for him. Now every people has problems that they need to face every day.

"You want some shitty advice?" I asked him Hance, and he nodded to me.

"Don't stop to keep up with their high expectations, as long that you gave your best shot, that's enough, but remember that there are a lot of things to make you happy, find a person that will give you a kind of shelter where rest is all you can feel when you saw that person." He handed me his phone, and I looked at his expensive phone.

"Can I have your number?"

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