Four years.
I counted in my thoughts while staring at a tall building standing in front of me.My lips curled into a bitter smile. It’s been four years yet this is still the place where I keep falling. I let out a deep sigh then walked towards the entrance of the house. I was about to ring the doorbell when I noticed it wasn’t locked. I decided to just come in.As soon as my eyes landed towards the interior, I felt the same vibe. I sadly smile.Nothing changed.My eyes automatically roamed around in search of him yet I did not find anything.My legs brought me towards the stairs, touching the same wooden yet smooth edges of the handle. “Bjorn?” I called out, slowly tiptoeing towards the steps.“Ahh! Faster babe!” Upon reaching the top, my heart immediately pounded hard. I was hearing familiar voices echoing throughout the hallway of the floor. “Yes! Fuck!”Slowly, my knees started trembling. Tears wanting to escape my eyes yet I continued to walk forward to his room—no, our room.My hands weakly held the sturdy wall as I leaned to see the man I married, naked with a strange woman pleasuring herself above him.Don't ever fucking cry, Azaia.This is not new anymore.This is what you’ve been witnessing every time you come home after work.I slowly averted my attention and walked towards one of the guest rooms of the house. I tiredly threw my luggage in the side and lay down on the bed.Little by little, I felt tired and my eyes gradually closed with a dejected smile on my face.I’m not sure if it’s because I was tired from the long travel or because I am back to the same fault I have thrown before.I chose to just avert my attention and concentrate on sleeping.I do not want to think about it over and over, knowing that I’ll only be hurting myself.I woke up from the loud slamming of the door. And there, I saw my husband standing with a smirk on his face.“It’s a good thing, you thought of coming back,” he said, sarcastically.I secretly heaved a sigh and slowly got up from the bed—scared that I might do anything that will make his blood boil in anger.“How’s America? Did you have fun playing with boys there?” he asked, obviously mocking me. His lips were curling the same way it did before; a devilish smile.“I went there to work, Bjorn. I did not go there to find someone to flirt with, I was there to work. I even seldom come out.” I calmly said. I made sure I was staring right through his eyes yet it was obvious how his face slowly darkened.My hands slowly trembled when he walked towards me.Breathe Azaia… breathe…His intimidating posture made me shiver in fear. I was scared of the endless possibilities. My eyes didn’t leave him until he stopped in front of me. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.“Do you think I’ll believe a bitch like you?” he asked. I almost let out a shriek when he immediately pulled my hair forcefully. He stared right through my eyes with a sharp glare onto his orbs. He slapped me hard on the face, making a loud thud.Immediately, my eyes clouded in tears. The slap felt sharp and numbed at the same time. I couldn’t understand the feeling other than fear and sadness.“Try and leave me again, Azaia. I’m telling you, I will kill Rafael,” he threatened. “Be grateful, I didn’t do anything to him yet. I could have killed him for all I want yet I didn’t. I’m warning you, don’t challenge me.” He clenched his jaw and furrowed his brows before leaving the room.When he was out of my sight, I was finally able to cry. I let out the tears from my eyes stream down as I look at the place where he left.I just feel lonely.Alone.And scared.In a snap, my mind automatically wandered back to the time when were still living a happy life.***
“FOR THE NEWLY WEDDED COUPLE, MAY THEY FIND HAPPINESS TOGETHER! CHEERS!” my best friend Safey hyped, raising her mojito.We all laughed at her remark and followed her gesture. We raised our glasses together with her, a smile roaming onto our lips.“Cheers!”Tonight is my bridal shower. We’ve been partying ourselves to our hearts content knowing that tomorrow I’ll be wedded with my longtime boyfriend named Bjorn De Castro.I can say that our relationship is perfect. We barely fight because we are matured enough to handle things.“I didn’t expect the two of you to get married this fast,” Safey commented, smiling thinly in front of me. It was then second motioned by our two friends, Kriselle and Jeselle. They are twins who had been our friends for quite a long time now.I just smiled at them and leaned on the couch. “We planned it a long time ago. We just postponed it because he wanted the two of us to graduate first and have the perfect job to settle in before heading for marriage,” I explained.“Psh, I hope all,” Kriselle said.We all just laughed at ourselves and started talking about random things about our relationship.“You’re lucky, Azaia. Bjorn is a good catch,” Jeselle started. “He hasn’t even looked nor cheated on you once,” she mumbled before letting out a chuckle. It was obvious that she’s already drunk from the countless drinks she had.Well, it’s not only her who is drunk—we’re all drunk, actually.I only smiled as an agreement to her words.“What are you saying? Azaia is also a good catch. She’s rich, beautiful, kind and loyal. She never even saw herself with any other men other than him despite having a lot of male friends,” Kriselle answered.I only shook my head from the blabbering of the twins. They were amusing to see the two of them enjoying their selves. My attention landed towards Safey who suddenly stopped joining our conversation.Worried that something is wrong, I gently held her hand to catch her attention. “Are you okay?” I asked.
Upon what I did, I noticed how she flinched for a second as if she was lost in her own thoughts earlier. She looked at me with a narrow smile on her face before nodding.“I’ll get us another drink,” she added before standing up.Despite having to be curious with what she was going through, I did not ask any further.“Can you still handle another drink?” I diverted my attention and looked at the twins.“Last,” the siblings said in unison, making us laugh to ourselves.I shook my head at the silliness of the two before nodding towards Safey’s direction. After a while, she came back with four different drinks with assorted colors mixed within.“That’s too few. I thought it would be one bottle,” Kriselle complained.“We can’t afford to stay late, girls,” Safey reminded. “Remember, it’s Azaia’s wedding tomorrow. You wouldn’t want to look like a walking zombie on the aisle tomorrow, right?” she added, laughing.The two groaned.Safey then put down the tray of drinks on our table and sat down back to her seat.“It’s a good thing Bjorn had never been jealous of any of the guys you’ve been close with,” she said.A thin smile crossed my lips. “He knows I only look at them as friends and they’re the same as me.”“You’re the girl, alright!” Kriselle exclaimed.“So shall we drink our last shot?” Safey said and smiled to us.“I want the red drink!” Jeselle uttered and reached to get the red drink.“Blue!” Kriselle then added, even stretching her arm into the thin air.My bestfriend and I looked at each other and shook our heads upon their giddiness. We even laughed to ourselves, seeing how one of them almost tripped on the table because of their clumsy nature.I reached out my hand to grab the green drink.“As usual, your favorite color,” Safey commented, rolling her eyes.The last drink to stay on the tray was purple. When I motioned to drink it in one gulp, I wasn’t sure if it was only a hallucination but I think I saw her smirk.What was that for?“For the soon to be Mrs. De Castro!” Safey exclaimed, raising her glass. We all did the same.“For soon to be Mrs. De Castro!” we repeated and drank the last drink.After that, the twins were the first to bid their good bye followed by Safey.“Are you sure, you’re okay here?” she asked when she realized I’ll only be the one staying on our VIP room.“Yeah, Bjorn's going to pick me up so don't worry,” I assured her despite feeling dizzy.The last drink was a strong one.“Okay, call me when you get home,” she said and kissed me on my cheek before leaving.When I was now alone in the room, I could hear the loud song engulfing the place. I was sure that I couldn’t even tell earlier but not my hearing feels sensitive and my world was rotating on its own.Suddenly, I had the urge to pee. I immediately stood up from my seat and came out of the room. I even left my belongings on the table so that he’d know I was there.As my feet brought me towards the washroom, my body quickly felt hot.What the hell is happening?My vision started blurring when I bumped into something—someone. When he leaned forward to catch me from falling, my body grew hotter and sensitive.His arms wrapped around my waist felt sexy as my nose landed towards his sturdy chest.He smells good.I thought to myself. I could smell his breath along with alcohol mixed in it.“Are you okay?” When I heard his voice, my heart started racing.There was something to it that made me feel different. I couldn’t tell what it was.As the strong liquor attacked my system more, I felt my vision spinning. I tried to move away from the man but it was the wrong choice. Upon doing what I did, I found my lips landing into his.I groaned—no, more like a moan. There was really something preventing me from thinking straight as my body grew different.Unconsciously, I snaked my arms around his neck and kissed him more. In attempt to return the same thing, he kissed me with the same ferocity until his lips traveled down to my cleavage.I moaned and pulled his hair. It was giving me a shiver down my spine. What is happening to me?“I’m hot, please take it away,” I mumbled. For some reason, my voice sounded more husky, my breath hotter and more lewd.As he leaned forward for another kiss, I couldn’t remember anything anymore except the words, “I will, baby.”When I woke up from bed, I was already naked from top to waist down. I was beside a stranger and something happened between the two of us. My world immediately started to crumble, what will happen now?I did not realize that I had fallen asleep looking back. It was past one o'clock in the afternoon when I woke up.I started tidying up the room before taking a shower and fixing myself up.I stared at myself in the mirror.'Back to your old life, Azaia.'I thought and took a deep breath. I slowly went out and felt the house.I couldn't hear any noise, maybe my husband had left.I went down and went to the kitchen to prepare a food, but I was dumbfounded when I found a lots of alcohol in the fridge instead.I have no option in the end, but to go back in my room and decided to buy some stocks.I didn't even bother to get dressed because all my clothes are long sleeves. Just different colors and designs.I left the house and waited for a taxi to board. Soon there was a taxi so I stopped it immediately."Manong at the Manzato Mall," I politely said to the driver when I entered the car."Okay, Maam," he replied and started driving.I adjusted my seat and just focused my eyes on the road. A
It's been a month since I came back. I don't know if I can called it freedom— I can leave the house ,but his staff always following me.Like before, he often brought a woman home and moaned incessantly as if no one else could hear, then he would go to my room to hurt me afterwards.I am not numb, it hurts, it fvcking hurts physically and mentally but what can I do?Nothing ..I could do nothing but stay with him because of our son. I don't have anyone in my life. My parents are dead and all the property they left me as well as the company is managed by Bjorn. I don't have any fvcking knowledge how to run a company so I gave him the company before we got married. I guess I'm regretting it now although the company's doing good.Love?I don't know if it's still there but I'm still hoping that one day we can still fix this mess for the sake of our son.Rafael ..Thinking of our son makes me sad and happy at the same time.What does he look like?Is he living well?Is he healthy?Is he bei
"Where are you going?" Bjorn greeted me when I went out the room.I was a little surprised because he seemed to be really waiting for me to come out. Over the course of a few weeks my body re-accustomed to his pain every time he got drunk.I secretly watched him. Somehow I breathed a sigh of relief because he was not drunk. Because he's more violent when he's drunk, he doesn't really stop hurting me until I feel weak."At Ayesha. One of my friends I told you before on the phone," I stammered nervously.Yes, in those four years I still manage to connect with him through text. Though he's always cursing me in reply.I stiffened when he move forward and touch my face."Let's fvck before you leave," he said without hesitation as if the thing he was asking for was worthless.My heart beat faster with nervousness especially when he stared into my eyes.My throat went dry that I couldn't manage to speak.He did not wait for my answer and leaned me against the wall."B-Bjorn," I said when he
I'm currently watching a movie when my phone rang. I looked at it on the table and took it to answer when I saw the name of my friend, Ayesha. It's been almost a week since we last met, even though I always wanted to visit her to avoid my husband, I knew that it would be different for Bjorn. ‘She's back. Come here to the house and we will go to the bar together.’ She was silent when I answered the phone. I automatically stamp my feet as disapproval. I'm not fond of bars after what happened years ago, but I can't stand them. They are the only ones I have right now. "I'll be there in an hour. I just have to do something, " I said and ended the call. I sighed heavily as I stared at my phone. I bit my lower lip and start creating a message for Bjorn. I'm going somewhere. I will be with Ayesha and Cassandra, the two friends I am when I'm in America. If you couldn't remember, Cassandra was the one I worked for then as well as the next day from tomorrow. I typed long before s
Blink ..Blink ..And another blink .."What the fvck?" I hissed and slowly get up on the bed.I roamed my eyes at the unfamiliar room where I was. Then realization hits me. A guy was with me before I lost consciousness! I automatically scanned myself. It was as if I was drenched in cold water when my clothes changed. I'm wearing an oversized shirt, the worst is that I only wear panties.I tried looking for my long sleeve but I found none, only my bag was there. Then I feel myself. Somehow I breathed a sigh of relief without feeling anything. I'm a nurse, of course I fvcking knew if somebody just entered me. Especially and for a few years nothing get inside me.In the middle of looking around and feeling myself my eyes accidentally focused on the side table. There was a glass of water there while a red sticky note was glued. I approached it and even saw a grain of medicine. I get the note and read it in my head.Drink this when you wake up. Go to the kitchen after and eat. I'm in the
It’s already past six o’ clock in the evening when I got home. My heart was pounding hard while I was standing in front of the door. There were a lot of thoughts crossing my mind as I let out a deep sigh.What will he do to me? Will he kill me silently?I slowly reached for the handle of the door and upon twisting it open, silence immediately welcomed me. I roamed my eyes at every corner of the house but there were no Bjorn sight to see.I weakly dragged my feet towards the sofa of the living room and looked for my cellphone. Just as I found it inside my purse, my phone vibrated two times; a sign that someone left me a message.When I opened the screen of the device, the first thing to spring up was the name of Ayesha’s husband. I only clicked on his name and upon seeing his message, I breath out a sigh of relief.She’s fine. She’ll get discharged tomorrow.It felt like a bone stuck to my throat was pulled out. I was shock, scared and nervous when I found out my friend was immediately
When I finally decided to open the door and come inside, I found him at the living room, sitting on the sofa. He was watching something from the television up until he noticed my presence and turned to look at me with the same cold eyes.“Faster, bitch. Don’t act like some VIP,” he coldly said.My eyes blinked in disbelief. That’s it? There were no slapping nor kicks or punches? How come?Instead of acting like some frozen chunks in front of him, I walked up towards my room and did what he wants. I chose a simple black off-shouldered long sleeve dress from my closet and stared at how it looked like. It was a little over my knees yet it fitted me nicely. I just needed to look presentable from the whole gathering so I didn’t need to put a lot of effort into it. Applying a small amount of powder and lipstick, I quickly went my way downstairs in fear that he may run out of patience.After ten minutes of preparation, when he saw me from the last step of the staircase, he stood up from his
I woke up at noon the next day. I was in such a hurry when Andrei called me to pick up the child and his mother -in -law because my friend Cassandra was shot. My mind was unstable while driving. I could not believe that consecutive incidents have happened to my friends. I could not help but be afraid to think that I was next. I just held my breath and forced myself to calm down. This is really the hard part in my mind, I can’t help but control to exacerbate the scenarios in my brain.Chill, Azaia. Bjorn doesn't have an ex who is supposed to take a revenge on you.When I have finally reached the place, I quickly took Adrian and auntie to Ayesha's house to rest there for a while. After that, Ayesha and I went to the hospital to check on Cassandra's condition. Somehow I was able to breathe easily when I found out that she was not in critical condition. Yet my concern was still there because she was still unconscious until we left the hospital.I was already in a taxi and on my way home w