I wake up in my own bed. Well, once again ON my bed, with a throw over me, and yet again, it’s mid-morning and I cannot remember anything after falling asleep. There’s no way I just slept right through from five p.m., but as I check my bedside clock it flashes nine forty-three a.m. at me and I rub my eyes in disbelief. I didn’t dream, no night terrors, no crazy shadows and monsters dragging me out of slumber—a silent dreamless sleep that almost never happened before I came back here. This is happening more and more lately and I feel refreshed from a full night’s rest.I am still wearing yesterday’s dress, so Alexi must have brought me through and put me to bed at some point. This is getting to be a habit for him, and I sit and ponder for a moment the fact that he didn’t even try to wake me or do anything beyond let me sleep.I still don’t trust him, but somehow, lately … I don’t hate him quite so much either.

He’s back in minutes with a freshly styled do that adds to that groomed perfection of his as he pulls his jacket on one sleeve. Body emphasised by what he’s wearing and I am instantly drawn like a magnet to look at him. My eyes scan impulsively, immediately to the one thing that stands severely out of place, and causes an instant nervousness deep down in my gut; A tight chokehold on my stomach.‘Why are you carrying tonight?’ I nod towards the holster under his armpit, face dropping as seriousness hits me to dampen my libido. His gun on show and he just ignores me and continues putting on his jacket smoothly to cover it up. Something in my stomach swirls with unease, nerves rising as suspicion hits me and I move closer to him.‘Alexi? You never carry when you’re going to dinner. Why are you taking a gun?’ Sixth sense has all my alarms firing and my palms get instantly sweaty as nerves eat away at me. Something deep down alertin

Heart plummeting and head consumed with worry and frustration. I know it could just be that they don’t want to be disturbed and both have their phones on mute, I have never tried to call him at a dinner before, so I don’t know if that’s normal protocol.I trawl my phone to see if I have Daniels’ number, or any of the other men on his watch, then try Mico again when I find none. It just goes to answerphone right away this time and I shudder. Completely overwhelmed with this and hating how overwrought it has me feeling. I’m just cut loose and lost and don’t know how to act. My brain is spewing over a thousand scenarios and visions that turn my stomach inside out. I need to stop thinking the worst but I can’t help it.Something is wrong. I can feel it in my bones and soul, and Alexi never usually ignores his phone at any other time of day. It seems like Mico has turned his off suddenly and I start to tremble crazily.The pa

Alexi starts pushing into me, quick hard thrusts once he knows my body has accommodated to fit him, and he doesn’t hold back. He fucks me hard, uncontrolled passion as he pushes his weight down on me and finds my wrist with his own hand, pushing one arm over my head and holding me taut, so he can control how deep he hits my core. I claw at his shoulder and cling to him with my free arm, trying to get him as bodily close as I can. I want to taste every inch of him as I lick at his throat, his jawline and capture his lips for another scorching make-out session. I bite on his lip harshly, holding on for dear life and moaning as he screws me with a force that has us both panting and gasping for breath. His bed squeaking and creaking under the effort and I swear it might collapse.It’s not slow or even adventurous by any means. It’s more of a burning need to quickly be consumed, and as he impales me harder, bodies getting clammy with exertion and grunts and groan

 “What?” Everything in me halts to some weird frozen moment, suspended in time and my manic panic calms instantly to surreal numbness. One questioning word jerked out of me in response to his statement.Standing in the lift facing him while he holds the doors wide, only feet apart and so close to escaping I can almost taste it.Tears stop and my body stills. I openly stare at him in complete shock. Brain stuttering on his words and unable to react whilst in a state of disbelief.I stop my noisy breakdown and hold very still, breath paused, emotion idling while I wait. The hysteria of a moment ago fades to this eerie silence between us as I pause for an explanation, an expansion of his sentence. Of a meaning to him saying the word love, to me, of all people.He can’t love me. It makes no sense. He hates me. He hurts me, he always has. But he just told me he loves me, and he will do anything to keep me.