Vanessa, darling. Where are you? Mommy wants to play.
If you tell your Father about our little game, I would cut off your tongue!
Stop that blasted crying!
I jerk from the bed, panting heavily as I look around the room. The lights are off but the window is open, letting the curtains that are yellow with some Winnie the Pooh characters on them as I stare at the moon.
Crescent.
I shiver a bit as I realize I've been sweating again but I don't want to stay in this room anymore.
I had never liked the idea of staying alone.
Mother Superior knew that and when she felt like beating me to pieces wasn't actually going to do much, she'd send me to the cellar, keep me there for days till she knew I was weak from screaming too loud.
But of course no one knew.
I couldn't dare be ungrateful.
Even I, with my big mouth, knew that.
I quickly take the yellow blanket on my bed and wrap it around my body then begin to walk outside the room.
The whole house is eerily dark and quiet but I don't want to stop walking.
It felt like stopping would make her get me and so I just keep moving.
When I reach the door, I pull the handles, letting out a relieved breath when I realize it's not locked like the cellar and step out, the moonlight brighter now.
I sit on the top of the stairs, keeping my legs in an X position as I tug the blanket closer to my body, letting out another breath as steam comes out from my mouth.
"You are definitely not sleep walking"
My head snaps back, fear creeping in before I let out another sigh, calming down "Cream. Don't do that"
The male is at the door, white eyelashes staring at me while he rests the side of his body on it.
I notice he's wearing a white robe, though one side of it is down, showing his shoulder while I notice the gold goblet in his hand.
His face, as ever, is without emotions.
I look away, because I know it's rude to stare, curling the blanket more around me as I hear the pad of his feet as he comes closer before he stops at my side "May I join you?"
I nod.
He does so, sitting with his back as straight as a wall while he keeps staring at the gate, tilting his head at it "Were you trying to leave?"
I let out a small scoff "Not like I had anywhere I could go if I wanted to, to be honest, at least not here in Aeria"
"But if you did, would you have left?"
Maybe it's because it's just the two of us, but his voice is a notch easier to hear, or maybe it's the wind just taking the words easily to my ears, I have no idea "I had a nightmare, that's all"
"And it took you outside?"
"I—" I take in a huge breath then let it out "I don't like sleeping alone. I've spent most of my life sleeping in a room full of people so it felt really choking inside"
"How odd"
"What is?" I ask, looking at him.
He's still staring at the gate "That a room full of people is not what you'd consider choking"
I give a small smile "I guess I was supposed to use another word. Like Safe. I feel safer when I sleep with other people" Then after seconds of silence, I quickly add "Like the normal kind of sleep, not the other one that leads to babies and tears"
He doesn't say anything about that.
We stay quiet again, and yet, for a talkative like me, even the silence is alright, I can stand it.
"Sometimes I forget to sleep"
I look at him again as he spoke "You forget? Is that possible?"
"It happens to me so I guess" He says quietly.
"So you don't get tired?"
"I feel tired all the time. I don't want to sleep but I don't want to be awake" He says "Feels like existing is a job. I don't like jobs"
Isn't that depression?
"I don't want to die" He says as if he's reading my thoughts "I just don't—" He lets out a calm sigh "Care"
"Oh" I understand nothing "Is that why you're here?"
He looks at me, eyes barely open for me to see, voice so dull it sounds like he's mocking me "Not exactly"
And that's all he says about that.
Not that he wants to say more. I could already tell he was tired of talking about himself.
"Do you wanna share the blanket?" I ask after a while "It's getting kind of chilly and you're barely— Um—"
"I don't feel cold either" He cuts in "Or warm. I don't feel things as I should"
"Is that a good thing or...."
He doesn't answer me anyway.
I move closer to him after that, wrapping my blanket around his body as I hold his hands.
It's slim and cold, making me blow air on it as I rub my hands together and hold it again "You might not feel it but you could actually fall sick and I'm sure you'd feel that"
Cream doesn't say anything about it, neither does he stop me.
When I'm sure his hands warm enough, I look at the goblet "Is that wine?"
"This?"
He takes it up, twirling the liquid content inside "It's water"
I look into it now "Why is it in a goblet?"
He turns to me, eyes looking like it doesn't understand what I just asked or why I even asked "Because it looks classy"
He literally just said that in a 'duh, it's obvious' tone.
Why does it make me want to laugh?
"Okay" I say with a sigh, letting go of his hand "It's warm now"
Immediately I do so, his hand is grabbing mine, in a grip that's rather soft but making it obvious he didn't want to let go "No"
"No?" I repeat.
"If you let go, my hand would be cold"
Well, that reason sounded weird. I already knew that it would be cold, and yet, when he said those words, he still had his expressionless face on and his voice was as devoid of emotions as ever, as if he was being sarcastic even though I also knew he couldn't possibly be that.
Was that why he sounded like this?
Because he couldn't feel things well enough?
I don't ask anyway, just let him keep holding my hand as we stay under the blankets, the heat radiating from our bodies keeping us both warm before I say "It's getting colder. When do you plan on going back in?"
"When you go back"
I look at him now "You can't be serious"
For the second time that day, he turns to look at me, white hair blowing in the wind as he says "Do I look like I could make a joke even if I wanted?"
Nope.
"But still—" I drawl "You could get a cold"
"So could you"
I sigh, knowing that he wouldn't accept defeat now, or ever "Alright then, why don't we just both go inside? So we both don't get sick?"
"Okay"
So compliant.
As soon as I stand, he's standing as well, like I'm remote controlling him with every move I make.
When we get in, I shut the door with my free hand then walk back up the stairs while be stays at my side, eyes staring into thin air like he's sleep walking before we reach my door and I stop "Okay. This is where I say goodnight"
He just blinks at the door.
I try to pull my hand out of his but I realize his grip doesn't want that happening "Um, Cream? You're still holding me"
As if that snaps him out of his trance, he looks at our hands, then at me "You want me to let go?"
I give a small chuckle "Well, you have to go to your room—"
"I don't want to"
I pause "What?"
He repeats it, sounding like a child someone just told to return the cookie he just stole.
A very stubborn child "I don't want to"
For the love of God, what have I gotten myself into?
"Why not?" I ask, frustration brewing inside me.
His reply was quick "You said you didn't want to sleep alone so I want to sleep with you"
Why am I getting horror movie vibes? Like the person I'm holding is a four year old ghost that's taking the likeness of Cream because he's literally the easiest to copy?
"That's nice of you" I say, feeling tired now "But I think I'd be fine—"
He tilts his head again, a habit that's becoming really creepy now "Do you think I'd take advantage of you?"
I quickly shake my head, the thought letting the tiredness evaporate "You? Pfft. No. I just— I just have to learn, on my own"
Cream stares at me, eyes so blank it feels like he's staring into my soul "So this isn't you sending me off so you'd try to run away?"
"No, of course not!"
He keeps staring "But your eyes—"
Then he comes closer, me taking a step back as I hit the wall while he leans closer, his breath cold as ice as he says "Your eyes tell me you're hiding something"
We stay like that for a while, me pinned to the wall as he towers over me, still staring into my eyes and as much as I wish I could look away, I can't.
Finally, he moves back, letting my hand go as he turns around and walks down the hall, his soft walking barely making any sound.
Then I hear nothing else as he pauses at the door, as if he's about to rethink leaving me behind, but eventually I hear the sound of a door opening and closing, making me let out a small breath.
What in God's name was that about?
After what had happened last night, all I really wanted was to sleep and not be disturbed.At least, for one more hour.But there's this puppy that keeps drooling on my face and breathing loudly on my ear, doing some licks here and there on mu cheeks no matter how many times I turn and try to push it away.I finally let out a loud groan, taking a pillow and pressing it over my head as I grumble "Who sends a puppy to wake someone up?""Ouuu. Is that my nickname?"I let out a scream as I roll off my bed and land on my butt, my eyes landing on the person that's sitting on my bed with a smile on his face "Good morning!""Chocolate?" I ask, because with that excited look in his eyes, it can't be anyone else "Were you— Were you the one licking me?"He nods and let's out an 'arf'I let out a louder groan "Why is everyone so weird?"Chocolate suddenly falls on the bed, looking at me with his head upside down as he says in a tiny voice "Would you come rub my tummy?"I make a face "Ewww! No!" T
Yesterday, Doc takes me to get some clothes (I had to wear her sweater and sweatpants out but I honestly doubt I'd ever return it) and my uniform.Not that I ever saw it after she bought it.When we returned, she asked what else I'd like to have in my room, as something personal for me since she had been the one who actually made the room and would like it if I left my own signature piece.Chocolate has his personal changing room.Caramel has a mini library.Cream has a water dispenser (turns out he's a fish. Are you surprised? I'm not)And Strawberry has a punching bag in his own room. Obviously, it's a sign of him needing help but I'm not saying a word about it.I, on the other hand, get five teddy bears.Why am I being the creepy teddy girl?Well, I'm glad you asked.Asides from the obvious fact that I'm absolutely terrified of sleeping alone because of the dreams I have, I also wanted to make sure Chocolate never has space to stay on my bed again so I can just sleep in peace.But
"Oh come on, it'd be fun!" "Well, dear Chocolate. Anyone who knows you and I can boldly state that I do because you've been on me like a leech for three days now, would know that your example of fun always has pain involved!" "But think about the sports bike! Who wouldn't like to be on a sports bike? Especially a bike that I'm riding in?" "I don't care!" There had a car they drove to school. An Audi Q5 anyway, but it was Strawberry who drove and it was also painfully clear that if I crossed my limits and entered the car as well, he'd happily run the car off the bridge and kill everyone just so I'd die too. So Coco, kindly, said he'd drive me to school. I mean, at first I was terrified out of my wits. Who in the lord's name would give Coco a car to drive? Did they not even worry about the pedestrians on the street? But no. It had to be a sports bike. Which is clearly worse. "Don't be like this, Kitten" Chocolate says, resting on the bike "We're going to be late. Not that I h
The first person to ever know what I really was, was my Ma.Alistair Montgomery was many things, and one of this things, was her ability to read people. It helped her in gossip groups, rising in fame—Helped her in handling me."Are you alright?"I look up from the book I was dawdling in. Doctor had given me saying I could write whatever I wanted in it, that was if I did not feel okay enough to talk to her myself that was.But I would never write what I felt. What I thought.It didn't help anyone.Kai is sitting some feet away from me, a look on his face that reminds me of how Lily looked at me when Mother Superior brought me out of her basement.I hated it.I chuckle, closing the book "Yeah. My shoulder still kinda hurts though""Wanna go to the clinic?" He asks.I give a brief shake of my head "No. It's just a light bruise, it'd go away"I try to reach out for it again, wincing one more time. I think I hit the handle of the locker and hurt something, I don't even know anymore."Um,
Throughout the whole day, no one talks to me. Though I'd rather they had because the side talks and eye stares were uncomfortable but Kai made it bearable.For one, he tried widening my japanese vocabulary but I was really glad I only knew certain phrases and didn't want that to change."But it makes you look like an idiot" He said"A kawaii one" I replied with a wink.He groaned."But when I realized that school was over, my body tensed.Kai wouldn't be there.Kai couldn't make me feel comfortable.Of course he realized my sudden quietness but I didn't give him an explanation. I know that there was no need for me to worry about going back because I was fine before but that fees so long ago.Kai hd offered me a ride home but I didn't want him to see that I lived with them so I just told him I already had a ride though I doubt I still did after everything that had happened.I walk into the girls bathroom, glad that it's quiet and empty as I stare at my reflection.My hair needs obvious
For as long as I can remember, I have never been brave.I always tried to avoid trouble, always tried to make sure no one got into trouble because of me. Most of the times, I would rather make myself suffer for as long as I could if it meant no one would get hurt.I didn't want to be a burden to anyone anymore.It was why the first time I met Chocolate, I kept running away from him, but he was the most persistent person I had ever met.Sure, there were days he terrified me but instead of me to be scared of what he was, it only made me want to be by his side and help calm him down as much as I could.That way, it would be like an equivalent exchange right?He protects me, and I care for him.But Chocolate was never the type to show emotions, and when he did, it was like he made an enormous mistake and he would replace it with a laugh and a grin.I never told him, but he always made me feel useless.Cream and Strawberry as well.When I tried placating Ber, it always ended up with me alw
I fucked up.I know that. I knew I was going to the moment I felt her hand on my arm and an electrifying feeling nearly shut down my senses.But I didn't feel sorry for what I did.So what? She was the one who broke my personal space first! No one even touches me when they know I'm pissed! Except Chocolate, but he's a maniac.I hiss as a small voice in my head tells me that she didn't know that but I ignore it, my eyes still on the two figures in the yellow painted room.Doctor is on a chair, Vanilla seated on the floor facing her bed while she rakes a hand through her blond hair, each movement so gentle that it doesn't surprise me when I can hear slight snores leave Vanilla's lips.And it also doesn't it surprise me when Doctor uses her other free hand to send a message to me without even looking back.Close the door and go to your room.I clench my fist, the thought of leaving them alone horribly unpleasant but I knew she was already upset with me and I didn't want to push my luck s
The next two days pass so fast and I really hated it.Due to the fact the handle of the locker I was shoved into it before had bruised my shoulder and Strawberry slamming to the wall, it had practically shifted a bone out of place and I had to wear a sling all the time.I mean, I didn't even know how bad it was till Doctor found me on the floor of my room, grasping my hand in pain and she checked it for me and took me to her room which was different from ours and yet, still the same.Her walls had a dull yet cool colour to it, but around it was a white bed with two white comforters and a white duvet, a caramel coloured vanity desk and wardrobe, a chocolate coloured couch, armchair and chaise lounge, red curtains—And a yellow grand piano. It looked like it was just newly painted anyway. She never told me what the significance meant but I could tell a bit. The room looked like a black and white scene from some dreary movie but when you saw the colour around the place, it gave a calming