Chapter 2: Beginning

The smell and feeling of fresh air welcome Aminah as she steps out of the car. Her grandmother from her mother's side immediately embraces her, she looks so delighted while Aminah seems like someone died. Well, her hope actually died the moment her father turned her back and decided to believe rumors, lies, and fake news. She no longer feels that her existence is significant to him ever since she remarries. She doesn’t mind it at first because her priority is his father's happiness but this incident made her realize that she isn’t the priority of her father. He already has a family to care for and she becomes the outsider. 

Her father looks apologetic while she’s arranging her things but he doesn’t even utter any words, till they fix her paper for the transferee. She looks around at the school. It's wide, the clear sky is visible, and the gate is welcoming and refreshing. Compared to urban schools where there are a lot of buildings and it’s hard to breathe as even the school entrance emits a competition and expectation vibe. Aminah is forcing herself that this school is better than her old school. It's the weekend and there are only a few people inside, some staff is cleaning, and some are playing baseball in a wide area. 

Everything is settled now and all she has to do is to go to school next week. On their way to her new home, his father finally spoke to her.

“Your grandmother has disabilities but your cousins and auntie here take care of her, they communicate to her through sign language. You must learn that in order to talk to her, your grandmother is old and you're her only grandchild to her youngest child. So, she wants to be with you, you haven't been with your grandma for a long time”

She just keeps her mouth shut and lets her father speak, things that her father didn’t even do. Letting her speak, she’s tired of asking him to listen anyway. 

“You have to make sure to get along with them, be obedient, and don’t do anything that can ruin your reputation. Stay here until everything is settled at our house, calm your auntie’s anger first before you come back home” 

Our house? Home? I doubt it. 

Aminah locks herself in the room that was given to her, she doesn’t do anything wrong, she felt unfair and cried nonstop till she felt like she can no longer cry. In the first week, she doesn’t talk to anyone, even her cousins, and relatives that visit. It was awkward for her to start a conversation as she hadn't talked to them for a long time.

A month later after coming back to school with bruises, messy hair, and dirty clothes, her grandmother suddenly hit her using a broom. She indeed cried hard; she didn't understand at first why she cried because the hit was not that even hard. But she finally understands as her tears can’t keep on falling. She cries like a kid as all that she’s storing in her heart suddenly bursts; her new school, her new family, and she’s physically and emotionally tired. All the pain she tried to hide finally burst into tears. Looking at her grandma trying to say something to lecture her but can’t even utter a word she felt bad. She just saw herself embracing it and looked back at the days her grandmother tried to get along with her. She’s annoyed at everything but feels sorry. She then embraced her tightly and cried a sincere cry.