Chapter 32

I shake my head. My chest is hurting so much that for a moment I wonder whether the coronary I foretold earlier has actually come to pass. But it’s just my throat muscles clenching, locked in a spasm of grief that I fight to hold in.

I don’t know whether she truly meant that, or if she said it to make both of us feel better. It must be the latter? Surely I’m not the only one here who’s fallen in love?

I look into her eyes. They plead with me not to say it. And they shine with all the emotion she’s trying to hold in.

Clearly, I’m not the only one.

There is no obvious solution. The path ahead is blocked by brambles, and I can’t see my way clear. I can’t control this situation, any more than I could control what happened with Christian. For the first time in years, panic rises inside me at my impotence, a word no man ever wants to encounter.

I take a deep, shaky breath, and blow it out slowly. Alice has feelings for me, and I need to take consolation from that, and hope that the way ahea