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night of pain

I was forced to look at my own body to see what he meant.  I did not have such a bad appearance, but one statement from his lips and I began to question my body.

I suddenly began to think there was something wrong with my long black straight hair and my green-doe eyes.

Or, was it my body?  Were my breasts not big and perky enough for him or was I not curvy enough for him?

“Maybe I should have requested a full body picture before signing the contract with your desperate father.  Your hips are too damn straight.  Are you even capable of having a child?”

he shook his head.  “The maids will show you to your room.  Get ready for me tonight.  The sooner we get this done with, the less I get to see your face” he paused, taking one final good look at me.  “Your body disgusts me”

My heart had never been so shattered before. I couldn't understand if he knew I was his mate or if he just simply didn't care.

But why wouldn't he want a mate? Everyone wanted a mate. That everyone included me.

I yearned deeply for him. I wanted him close to me. He was my mate and I was bound to need him, but that feeling was subdued by the fact that he didn't even know he had a mate.

I was led to my supposed room by the maids. A purple aesthetic room. Way bigger than the pity of a room I had to sleep in darksky pack, my stepfather's pack. He only did all this because his pack was more like a joke. He sold me for the alliance so he could strengthen his stupid name and pack.

“You need to get a shower first," said the maids, snapping me from my thoughts which seemed to have overwhelmed me.

“Oh okay" I uttered like a robot, not realizing what was going on, but then it dawned on me that they were preparing me for their Alpha.

Being a virgin at 21 wasn't something I was proud of, but how could I have done the deed when my stepfather was bent on not letting me ever leave the house? He preferred to make my life miserable, trapped inside almost half my life. I had always asked myself, why he did that.

Seated in a pack house 4 hours far away from home, I found the answers. He had just been prepping me so he could sell me when the time came. He got the opportunity and probably thought he hit the jackpot because he got Alpha Lucian

I took my shower and I was provided with a night dress. A see-through dress that I felt naked in. I was least comfortable in it.

As I watched the maids leave with a heavy heart, I knew exactly what was coming next.

Anxiously, I clutched the hem of my dress as I sat in silence, waiting for my doom to begin.

It didn't last up to 2 minutes before the door opened. I was greeted by the cold look that sat comfortably on his mouth-watering devilishly handsome face.

“Stand" he ordered coldly and I reluctantly stood. There was something about that deep crisp voice that stimulated every nerve of fear on my skin.

There was no doubt I wanted him, but I was aware he didn't want me. I was also aware of how effectively he could get rid of me from the face of the earth if I pissed him off.

If he could do it to his parents, who was I? An ordinary sold bed warmer?

He scanned my body with his sharp blue eyes and I was confused why he did it because he clearly stated my body disgusted him. If it did so much, he wouldn't be so immersed in staring at it.

“Take your clothes off," he ordered after many seconds had passed.

My heart skipped because I knew it was finally happening. I took the sleeves away from my shoulder and freely, the dress went down.

I stood with my bare body facing his. There was no change in his countenance. It was a certainty my body did nothing to him. I bet he was irritated.

He walked towards me with my heart in my throat. I was so nervous, but I tried my best not to show it, clenching my fist to prevent my hands from shaking.

He cupped my chin. “You are not a virgin, are you?"

My brain had never ran so fast before. I knew I was, but I kept thinking if it would be a good idea to tell him I was.

“No, of course not" I swallowed.

“Very good, because I don't plan on being gentle," he let out and without giving me a chance to say anything, he threw me on the bed.

He flipped me around like I was a piece of pancake, making me lie with my back facing me.

“Bend over, are you so dumb?" he snapped at me because I just laid there not doing anything.

I did his bidding and stood on all fours. That seemed to piss him off. He hit my hand and it did the job of informing me that I wasn't supposed to rest on my palm. I bent over more, resting on my elbow instead, to give him a better entrance.

While in that position, I felt the tip of something hard poke at the entrance of my mound. I already knew that instant that it was his shaft. I sucked in the air, waiting for the penetration. I knew it was going to hurt like hell

With one big force, he rammed into me. My eyes flung open as everything turned white for a second. I saw stars as the excruciating pain shot through me.

My mound felt hot as though it was kept on top of a roaster. I yelped out in pain, but that didn't stop him from banging deep and fast into me. The room was dark and that was probably how he couldn't see I was indeed a virgin.

It he knew, would he go slower?

It went on for minutes, the most painful minutes of my life. I tried to fight the pain that was too hard to bear. All this was done so he wouldn't know I was in pain.

I didn't know if he would care about it, but if at all he would, I didn't want him to stop because I knew it was something I couldn't escape from. After all, it was part of the childbearing process.

I felt something rush through me as he groaned in pleasure while I struggled in pain.

He collapsed beside me to catch his breath but within minutes he was up again.

“Same time tomorrow," he announced and my mouth dropped. I could barely walk and he wanted to repeat this with me?

“Why, we have already done it"

He scoffed. “And then what? you might not end up pregnant and I have to continue this months later? I don't think you know but this is likely going to go on for 2 weeks until I am sure you are pregnant. Is that clear?" he asked and all I could do was nod like a puppet.

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