I spent an hour reading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince to my mom. It had been her favourite book in the series. I didn’t like to read much but only did it because mom loved them and I enjoyed reading to her just like I had just done. I read till I was tired before I closed the book and laid on the well trimmed grass beside her grave.
At first, our staff found it creepy that I felt comfortable lying beside a grave but to me it was not just a grave but my mother’s bed. She was there and I never had to feel afraid when it came to her. I would spend hours here and it was always easier to talk to mom about issues I could never talk to Dad about.
“Mom, Dad may be coming over to join you soon so you won't be lonely anymore. But I would be. Without the both of you here, it would be very lonely. Who would take care of me then?” I know I should not be so negative about Dad’s recovery but I can't help it. The situation was not looking good and it was better if I prepared myself mentally for it.
“I am trying to be positive about the situation, Mom but it is difficult to remain positive when the medical team has given up on him. They may pretend to try to help him but I can see it on their faces. They don’t think Dad would get better. I don’t blame them though. Anyone who sees dad’s state would also have the same thoughts.
“I don’t know what I would do with my life mom, I was not prepared to navigate this world alone. What about the business? Who would take care of it? I am not prepared to handle a company and hell would bend over before Uncle Jason gets his filthy claws in our company”
Uncle Jason was my dad’s brother and he was a greedy bastard. Dad and Uncle Jason were the only children of their parents. While Dad had worked to establish the construction company, Blick Construction, Jason had turned to gambling. Dad used to give him money because Jason was his older brother and he wanted his brother to have a good life but Jason had almost caused Dad to lose the company as he almost drove it to the ground with bankruptcy. At that time, Jason was the managing director which gave him access to the company’s funds.
That was when Dad’s eyes opened and he drove Uncle Jason out of the company and he had not taken it lightly. Ever since it happened, he barely kept in contact with us and we preferred it that way because whenever he came around, it was always to ask for money.
The main reason I would never let Uncle Jason near Dad’s company was not just because Uncle Jason gambled but also because he was terrible at management, probably worse than I would be. When Dad was tired of constantly giving Uncle Jason money, he opened an import company for him but he ran the business down with poor management in less than a year. So that was not going to be happening with dad’s hard work.
“I wonder if he was contacted that dad was sick. He hasn’t come around in over a year. Maybe Dad gave him enough money to last for a long time. I hope he doesn’t show through”
If anyone saw me right now, they would think I was crazy. Well anyone except the people who lived in our house. They are used to it now.
“You know I have never felt bad that I don't have uncles and aunts like the other people I know. At first I was jealous of how my friends had a family vacation and all but now it feels relieving. It would have been better to have another sibling though.”
The cool breeze that gently caressed my cheeks as I lay down there reminded me of Mom. It felt like she was sitting down beside me and was caressing my cheeks with the abc of her hands that were always so smooth. I miss her so much it hurts.
I may have been able to cry but I was emotionally exhausted at this point. I had cried my eyes out and they hurt. I had to wear a pair of shades as I sat under the sun because it was painful to be outside without them.
I had exhausted my complaints so I moved on to tell Mum all about my trip. I made sure not to leave out any details including how I had avoided Dad’s call because he usually bugged me about coming back home. It was almost sunset when I concluded everything I had to say.
Speaking to someone about what is going on with you makes things easier especially if they could not give you the judgemental stare or advice, not that mom would have been so harsh.
I decided to watch the sunset before heading back to the house. Today was productive since I was able to talk to Mom and get so many things off my chest. I was feeling better so I would go straight to check up on Dad after watching the sunset. I had not gone back to the bedroom since I was driven out by Duke.
I think I am in the right frame of mind to go there now and not get too emotional and cry like an idiot. I was staring at the sunset when I heard a voice from a distance. I was going to ignore it because I thought it was the workers conversing among themselves but there was a sort of urgency in the voice as it got louder.
I looked back to see one of our staff running towards me. She seemed to be saying something but I could not make out clearly what she was saying as she was a little bit far from me. I stood up, dusted the grass off my pants and picked up my books before hurting in her direction.
I wondered what was making her call me in such a hurry. She did not slow down until she got to me and by then she could not utter a single word. As she got to me, she bent down with her hands on her knees as she struggled to catch her breath.
She attempted to speak but she couldn’t utter a single thing so I gently patted her back and tried to help her calm down.
“Hey, take it easy. Calm down first before you try to say anything” She still wanted to speak so she raised her hands to my shoulders to shake me. She was wheezing seriously and I totally understood how she was feeling.
The distance from the main house to this place was not close at all. It took a good fifteen minutes or twenty minutes to walk around the house to get here and it seemed as though she ran from the main house down here in a hurry to tell me something. Dad had wanted Mom’s grave to be far from the main house, he didn’t want it to be easily accessible to just anybody which was why it was a bit far from the main house. I thought it was unnecessary at first but when I started to have my private time with her, I understood what dad was aiming for.
She probably was not used to running a lot so she was a bit disoriented. I continued to rub her back as i waited for her to calm down so she could properly tell me what she wanted to tell me.
“Hazel your dad…” she gasped for air. My hand stopped stroking at the mention of my dad and my actions took a complete 180.
“What happened to my dad?” This time I was no longer calming her down. I grabbed her by her shoulders and made her stand up. I could not even wait for her to speak before I attacked her with more questions shaking her vigorously.
“Answer me, what happened to my dad? Is he okay? Please say something?” I did not give a damn that I was not giving her space to answer me but she was still there catching her breath which she should have done already. How hard could it be to run from the main house here?
“Your father…” She stopped mid-way and I almost shoved her to the ground in frustration. I tightened the fingers I had on her shoulders and I saw her wince at how tight I was gripping her but I did not care.
“Talk to them, stop cutting your words short, what happened to Dad?” this time I could not help but yell and her eyes widened in fear as she saw my face become furious at how annoying her stalling was becoming.
“Your dad is awake”
I think I was ready to be an Olympic runner due to the number of times I had found myself sprinting due to one news or the other lately as a result of Dad. The moment the news had left the young lady’s lips, I found myself taking off in a race. The supposedly long distance to the house didn’t seem too far anymore as I made my way towards the house in a flash. When the staff saw me racing, some ran after me, probably guessing that there was news related to father and they also wanted to hear it since everyone had been on edge since he had been unconscious. I raced as fast as I could to my weak legs that were not used to so much work, not caring to check if the messenger had followed behind after I dashed off leaving her behind after her reveal. Does this mean Dad would be okay? His waking up has to mean something good right? It would probably mean he would make a full recovery, wouldn’t it? I did not want to allow room for negativity so I was making sure the negative questions that w
“This was my favourite photo of you. You looked like a real angel. I had to take that photo. There was so much love and adoration in Dad’s eyes as we looked at a picture of me when I was seven. I had to admit I was a real beauty as a child. It felt like I was staring at a human-sized Barbie doll. I had on a cute pink gown and my blonde hair was parked into a ponytail and my eyes seemed so blue as they sparkled with mischief. “It was a hassle to get you to stay still that day. You had way too much candy because your mom could never resist your puppy eyes and you knew it. We had to bribe you with a promise of another candy if you stayed still enough to take that photo” he smiled and ran his hands over the picture, taking in every little detail. “That was the best day ever. Mom had finally gotten that catering degree and made us a feast. I didn’t understand what it meant back then but I was happy because she was happy” “I loved her, you know, it killed me when she was taken so quickly
I did not go back to see Dad after I walked out due to anger. I made sure Agnes, the maid in charge of Dad, gave me updates about his health though. Even though I was angry, I was still scared of anything happening while I wasn’t there. I was currently lying in my bed where I had been since I walked out of my father’s room. I was starving because I was too angry to eat anything yesterday and now I was suffering as a result of my poor decisions. The movie I was watching suddenly seemed uninteresting as I remembered that I would be married to a man I had never seen. I tossed my phone to the side and rolled on my back so I could face the ceiling. Marriage may not be one of the things that I had sorted out but it still didn’t mean I wanted to just marry anyone. I was considering being single for the rest of my life and just adopting a kid or two so I won't end up alone and sad but now that option was out the door. I had spent all night searching for everything I could find about
I don’t think I have ever been this nervous in my life. I thought the most nervous I would ever get was when I was waiting for my admission letter but standing here in front of the mirror in my walk-in closet as I examined my outfit for the thousandth time, I could barely breathe. I told myself I didn’t care and I would not bother to try hard at all but when Mariam, one of the maids had told me that Atticus was around and Duke had requested that I make myself present in an hour, my body told a different story altogether. I hated that my body wasn't working with me as I tried to calm my nerves. The sweat in my palms seems to increase with every moment that passes despite the cold room. It was as if the air conditioner was no longer working or my body was rejecting the cold. I know I looked amazing but I had no intention to try and seduce the man just because I wanted him to treat me fairly. Atticus was not a stranger when it came to stunning women. I had seen pictures of him with
I was trying to make myself late on purpose. I was currently standing in the middle of my closet trying to decide what to wear or rather I was trying to make Josephine who was supposed to help me get ready think I was trying to figure out what I wanted to put on which was a lie. I was not thinking about what I was going to wear because at the end I was just going to grab the first outfit I could find. I was just trying to get myself to believe that I was really getting married. My wedding was nothing like I would have imagined it if I ever had to think about what my dream wedding would be because there was none. It felt useless to get angry over the logical reason why there was no wedding but it still irritated me and made my annoyance for Atticus grow. He didn’t want to have any wedding so we were just going to be signing the papers and the lawyers were going to take care of the rest. Dad told me that he insisted on no wedding because doing one with Dad’s condition wasn’t the ri
It's been three days since Atticus walked out after we signed the marriage certificate and there had been no contact from him at all. Not that I was expecting any form of communication with him or anything but somehow for reasons unknown to me, I felt a little ache at being so blatantly tossed aside because that was what it was, he didn't need to do anything for me and he didn't owe me anything. He was obviously letting me know he didn’t care and that’s to be expected since we were strangers and I hated myself for feeling a bit irritated. I dropped the cloth I had been using to wipe Dad’s cold and still body. He was running a temperature so I decided to clean him with a cold cloth to see if I could reduce the fever. He had been unconscious since yesterday and I had made sure not to leave his side. I wanted to be the first person he sees when he wakes up anytime I’m sure I smelled terrible since I haven't taken a shower since yesterday but I didn’t care at all. I was too scared to
Someone was shaking me awake and it was getting annoying. I swatted the hand away again for the thousandth time but it came back just like it did the numerous times I had tried to get rid of it. I wish I could open my eyes and the person so hard they would find it difficult to get their bearings for a week but I had to open my eyes first and I was too tired to open them. I had been by Dad’s side for almost a week without sleep, waiting to see if he would wake up but he didn’t. Just like he did before, Duke had to force me to get some sleep and that was about an hour ago. The moment I hit my bed after taking a much-needed shower, I could almost kiss Duke in appreciation as I realized I was on the brink of death with how exhausted my body was. The delay in Dad’s consciousness was taking a toll on the staff and their hope was slowly fading away with time. They seemed to have given up altogether because they had heard he was not getting better so now all they did was throw me sympatheti
Life had suddenly gone still and I seemed to be the only one that existed. Dad died three days ago and my sense of living seemed to have died with me. I couldn’t muster up the energy in me to do the simple things of life any more. Duke and Dr Martin had found me lying across Dad’s chest. I held on to him for so long that they had to pry me off him when the Dieners came to pick him up. It had been a struggle. My mind would not believe that Dad was going away for good. I didn’t stay behind to watch them cart him away. I may have struggled with them too and not allowed them to do their job, instead as soon as they successfully got me off him, I walked straight to my room and shut the door behind me and I haven't opened it since then. I’ve had multiple people that I didn’t bother to identify come up to my door and knock asking me if I was okay but I didn't utter a word. Somehow, Duke managed to open the door to my room but he didn’t say a word, just rolled in a cart of food and kept it