heartbreak is death itself

Dating My Ex-Boyfriend’s Daddy

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Chapter 3: heartbreak is death itself

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—ANOTHER WEEK LATER—

*Addison*

“Are you holding silent conversations with yourself again?.”

I turned to my left seeing Devin, a co-worker and coincidentally, my best friend’s boyfriend.

“Hey, Devin.” I say, my voice cracking a little bit.

He sighed bringing up his hand to touched my forehead as he gave me a look.

“You have been crying all day, haven’t you?.”

I’m not sure if it’s the exhaustion of the different panic attacks I had today or the soft encouraging look from Devin that spurs me to suddenly be so open, but I’m too tired and I just feels like I’m failing.

“I want to die, Devin... .” I rasped out blankly staring at the cars driving out of the company’s driveway. “It’s been weeks and I feel like I can’t catch a break in this company.”

“Addison ... .” He mutters in response reaching out to hold my hand.

“I feel like I’m nothing without Joshua.” I replied shakily.

“No, no, no.” Devin disagrees with me as he rubs my hand he was holding gently with his thumbs. “Don’t say that!.”

“But everyone says that!. No one has been able to give me a break! Joshua this! Joshua that! Joshua and I broke up 2 weeks ago but I always feel like it’s yesterday because of the way everyone keeps reminding me!.”

“It’s okay to feel dejected after a breakup especially if you loved him but that doesn’t mean you should put yourself down! You are perfect the way you are.”

I scoffed. “Perfect with my eyes looking all bloodshot and puffy?.”

“Yeah you are ugly..”

“Hey!.” I interjected giving him a little blow.

Devin chuckled withdrawing. “Oh come on, you are my friend, where does it say that I can’t taunt you?.”

I rolled my eyes in response as I replied instead. “I won’t be coming with you today. Pass the information to Tara that I’m going back to my dad’s house.”

“So no Friday night at the club then?.” Devin asks instead of inquiring ‘why’.

I nod giving him a small smile as a way of apologizing and Devin bids his goodbye reluctantly.

I watched the cars drive out from the parking lot for some minutes before turning around to walk ahead to my Dad’s mansion.

Telling myself that although I felt dead inside, my body was still alive. I must be tough so that I can live a good life.

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As soon as I entered the sitting room of my father’s Mansion, I saw my Dad, Philip Garcia and Maria Garcia, my so-called 'mother'.

Rather devil of a step mother.

The main reason my life was miserable, the main reason why I would never forget that I was an illegitimate daughter since Maria never failed to remind me each day.

My half-sister, Lia, who I would never forgive for giving me this heart wrenching pain, was sitting on the couch in the living room.

There were all having a conversation with broad smiles on their faces.

The maid saw I arrived and she greeted me with a smile, "Good evening, miss."

Hearing the maid's voice, the other three in the living room looked towards me.

Her step mother first scoffed regarding her with a look of contempt. “Two weeks away from the house and you are suddenly back? Why have you come back then?.”

I ignored her sentences which angered her to continue.

“Nobody wanted you for the night, huh? I prefer you hate this home and don't ever come back because we will surely enjoy your absence." Maria berated me harshly.

Since I wasn't her daughter, and was given birth by a random prostitute with whom my father cheated with on her, she has hated me ever since and she did not feel the need to talk to me kindly or peacefully.

In all things, I have gotten used to her choice of words as I completely ignored them. I have been living in this house for over 20 years which made me accustomed to my step mother’s mean nature.

I would never forget this mean woman who had spared no efforts in murdering my mother the moment she found out that the poor woman slept with her husband.

I instead looked at her father, who was sitting nearby, and said, "Good evening, Dad.”

"Take a seat, Addison. We were talking about your sister and her boyfriend, Joshua Roswell." My father replied indifferently not concerned about the insults that were being hurled at me by his despicable wife.

He also had never been kind to me too so what should I expect?

But he must have been in a good mood today to not hurl words at me too.

I had a confused facial expression as to why we needed to talk about Joshua and Lia.

"She's a bitch. Why should she know what’s going on?". Lia said as she looked at me with obvious contempt and resentment, as I was about to sit next to her.

Then she added to spite me. “Addison, I am going to make it clear to you. I'm already Joshua Roswell’s girlfriend. And I am pregnant for me. He took me to get a pregnancy test at the hospital last week and it was confirmed.” Lia said with an obvious smirk forming her face.

Whenever Joshua’s name was mentioned, my heart would still ache beating against my chest like it was threatening to come out because I loved him so much.

Despite trying very hard to forget him, I just couldn't get over him.

Joshua was my first love.

But it was obvious to me that he wasn’t good for me. Having sex with Amelia all this time and I never knew.

They must have done it more than once for her to get pregnant.

"That is nice. My congratulations to you!" I said doing my best to force on a smile.

My voice was calm and I looked unperturbed.

“Oh and the whole family is going with me to meet Joshua and his family tomorrow, you don’t mind tagging along, do you?.” Lia asked with mischievous innocence in her eyes.

I stood up from the couch heading back upstairs. “No thanks. I’ll sit this one out.”

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The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.

Back against the wall, crouching legs, chin on knee and arms wrapping them. I was crying alone in my room.

Him.

The one whose smile shone on every photograph that was in the room. On the dresser, on the nightstand, even inside the wardrobe.

The one whom only two week ago was my everything.

I looked at my hands, they weren’t soft and clean as they used to be. I stared at them like they didn’t belong to me, like someone took my hands and replaced them with new ones.

My hands were dirty and covered with blood—my blood.

Out of frustration and anger, I had hurt myself.

Instead of hurting those two people who hurt me.

My tears flowed as slowly and abundantly as it could. My eyes were swollen, my face was sticky and my cut lips tasted the salty tang of my tears.

Tears of anger and emptiness.

“Why?.” I whispered with an exhausted voice.

My eyes rested on the picture, our smiles, our happiness, our love...

“Was it even real?.” I asked myself, remembering that Lia revealed about she being pregnant.

They must have had sex multiple times behind my back.

“Why did it have to be my own step sister with Joshua? Huh? Why?". I chuckled sadly. “It was just a fake love.”

Life was so cruel to me.

First, I was an illegitimate child to a father that didn’t bother about my existence, I had an abusive step mother and my half sister did more worse things to her.

In my opinion, I felt like I was just living without a purpose and no one to love me truly.

I remained frozen in my corner for a long time until the blaring sound of a ringtone woke me up from my trance.

I glanced towards my phone that lighted up next to me. Sighing, I reached out and grabbed it answering the call.

“Hey, Addy! I know Devin probably asked you already at work but are you still up for a Friday night at the club?.”

It was Tara.

Yes. Anything to get me out of this hole I was sinking into.

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TBC