IV. The Invite

It had been two days, and I’m not done crying over him. Yes, I cried. And for the past two days, all I did aside from crying was stupidly scan and stare at our photos when we’re still together and reminisce the past that most likely out of my reach. 

A pathetic way of passing the time, I guess.

I know I should’ve tried to crawl out from my room, eat, maybe took a shower, and made peace with the reality that we’re done. But the stupid, still hoping part of me still thinks that he’ll come back to me and have our happily ever after in the end. 

Again, a pathetic way of passing the time.

Eight years. I can’t believe I wasted eight years of my life pining for someone I thought could give me love and stability. For eight years I stupidly gave my trust and loyalty to him, investing my time in our relationship.

All my life all I wanted was someone to see me. The real me. Not the well-established woman. Not the successful wedding planner and interior designer. Not the daughter of the world's two renowned heart surgeons. I crave attention. My insecurities were a product of my parents' upbringing. You see, they barely look in my direction. To busy building their careers and saving lives. Not that I have a problem with the latter. I even doubt that they'll recognize me on the street.

Looking back now, I should have done things I've never experienced before. Like camping, traveling to another city, going to beaches, drunk myself to oblivion and maybe tried to get to know more people with the same interest as me. I shouldn't have waited for those people that don't have any intention of sparing their precious time to be with me. 

It's not too late, I could still do those things especially that I have a steady source of income, blessed with the best employees I could ever have. And no, I'm not justifying my absence at work.

I'm ashamed to show my face to them.

Two days ago I had been ecstatic, handing out the invitations, and then in an instant, I'm single, lonely, and hurting.

In an instant, my world turned upside down.

In the past I'm just contented being label as Brad's girlfriend, the only label I have through the years, and it never crossed my mind to change it.

“But why did he ask for my hands in marriage? Why ask me something that requires his lifetime commitment? It's not like I'm dropping hints.” I mumbled to myself, looking at the stack of photos that are yet to burn.

Soon

‘You’re convenient, too easy and the only constant person in his life that he could always fall back into.’ A voice in my head taunted.

Yes, Brad had been dependent on me too, maybe not emotionally but financially. And with my parents' name and connection, he easily found his place on the biggest business empire of the era.

The Knight Empire.

“That’s why he didn’t tell me. That’s why he didn’t break things off between us, earlier. I probably look like a fool trying to please someone who isn’t mine, to begin with.” I muttered darkly while staring at his too-large smile on the photo.

A f*cking smile of a shameless deceiver.

I opened the small top drawer of my bedside table and reached for the scissor inside it. Then in an excruciatingly slow motion, I cut Brad's face into a thousand little pieces.

I smiled smugly as a satisfying feeling rushed through me while staring at the mess I made. ‘Look at me Brad as I cut you into little pieces. Look at as I ruin you.’ I thought as I took another photo, cutting it like the first one. This time it's his photo posing on an elite gallery exhibit in the financial district he'd been talking about for weeks before I get mine. It's an invite-only exhibit and only billionaires and prominent people were invited like my parents.

Luckily, my parents sent me their invites so I could attend in their place.

“Hey,” I almost fell from the bed if not from the bedside table on my side to steady me.

“Anna! When did you get back?” I yelped in shock? 

I looked at photo in my hand guiltily. “What—how did you get in?”

“By using this,” she said presenting the familiar keychain and the set of keys with it. With the speed I didn’t know I possess, I stand from the bed and snatched the key from her hand.

“Where's Brad?” She shook her, sadness clouding her eyes.

“He gave me his keys earlier this evening and this,” With shaking hands, I nervously took the too shiny paper from her outstretched hand before reading it. 

I have to blink twice to make sure I’m not hallucinating or anything before reading it again and again and again until reality slaps me hard. 

I staggered backward, one hand holding the paper and the other was covering my mouth but still, I can’t help the whimper that escaped from me the moment I saw their name on the glittering paper.

“He's going to marry her,” I whispered, disbelief painted on my face while blindly staring at their embossed name on the invitation card in my hand.

“Elle, look at me.” Anna was shaking me but I was deep in a trance that my body turns numb.

“And they have the nerve to send me an invitation card to their wedding.” I seethed, balling my hands into a tight ball fists destroying the paper in the process.

Anna cleared her throat while wringing her fingers uncomfortably. 

“Uhmm, Elle? That’s for me—” she croaked out, slightly grimacing.

“Brad gave it to me.”

Oh

I didn't know what hurts the most being invited to their wedding or being junk like trash, pretending that I was never in his life?

I thrust the ruined paper on her as I gripped her shoulder while harshly shoving her out of my room. 

“I’m sorry. But you should probably go.” I trembled, gritting my teeth.

She stopped in her tracks and face me, “I’m not going anywhere, Elle.” 

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