Chapter One

"Adanna! Adanna!! Adanna!!!" my mom called me repeatedly.

"Yes, mom!"

I dropped my Biology textbook carelessly on the bed as I raced out of my room to answer my mom. Making my way through the corridor, I caught the back view of my mom in the kitchen. She was humming to a song I haven't heard of before. Maybe it was a new track. 

"Mom, here I am."

Without bothering to face me, her voice rang out in the tiny kitchen.

"You will see my black purse on the floor in the dining hall. Collect just... I mean just one thousand nairas from the money." She looked at me significantly. "I don't want to look for a Kobo. Use the money to buy Okazi ingredients in the century market. Don't branch to your friend's house or shop. Do you hear me?" She dropped the oranges she was peeling, to stretch her right ear.

"Yes, mother!"

"Now go!"

I scurried out of the kitchen, making my way to the dining area. True to her words, the purse lay nonchalantly at the foot of one of the chairs that were arranged on the right-hand side of the table. Taking the required sum, I shook my head at the thievery allegations. It's well. 

I better hurry up. I dashed out of the house, closing the door in my haste. It made a loud bang causing me to grimace. 

"Don't break down my door, o! Stupid girl!!!" My mother's voice ran down my spine like acidic droplets causing me to shiver monetarily like I was scathe. 

I walked out of the compound to the streets with a heavy heart. I tried to uplift my spirit when I had walked a stone throw from my house but the drips of sweat like the blood that cascaded down my forehead and armpits made me more irritated. 

The sun seemed to be enraged this afternoon causing people to walk quickly to their destinations or remain sheltered in their shops while fanning furiously. The hawkers weren't out in full force yet, I bet is during the eventide they will work.

My country had first class in scorch heat. By the way, I am from Nigeria. Though I loved my country, I felt like I suffered incessantly here and felt we sort of offended our creator to push us to a part of the world that had severe climate issues.

Ten minutes later, I found myself staring at varieties of vegetable leaves that almost looked withered but yet cookable according to the seller. I didn't want to spend much time in the market, so I selected the ones I felt were good enough. The seller was at attention with black nylon carefully opened in her palm. I deposited my vegetables in it and moved on to the pepper tray. I picked some fresh peppers, examining them critically when I got poked in the ribs. It caused me to drop the pepper clumsily on its tray. 

"Hey..." I couldn't complete my sentence because in front of me was my best friend Joyce.

"Oh, it's you." I finished lamely.

"Yep, what's up?" She screeched happily.

I turned my attention back on the pepper and pointed at the ones I wanted to the seller. She packaged them for me as I waited patiently. 

"Nothing's up, o. Despite, I don't feel very cheerful at all." I informed her with a fake smile.

"What happened?" She asked with a little laugh.

"This heat is suffocating. I can't stand it." I used my right hand to sweep off the heat from my forehead. She gave me a pitiful look but more or less, laughed at me. 

The truth was that I was sad about my home treatment, it seemed to have been latched to the back of my mind creating an invisible weight on my fragile heart. I couldn't tell Joyce that though, at least not here. Or maybe, there were some things I'd rather keep to myself.

The saleswoman drew my attention back to her, querying if I wanted more items. I gave my standard reply, no and paid for what I bought. I grabbed my items and was about to step out with Joyce on my toes when a Hausa man with worn-out clothes stepped in front of us. He displayed the herbal medicines that were wrapped across his shoulders with a head tie and the black nylon he held securely with his left hand.

"We don't want to buy," I said.

"Look, make I tell you this herb if you take am, your system go clean. E go wash all your malaria o, typhoid o. You go see." the man gushed.

"I see but unfortunately we don't have money with us," Joyce explained as politely as possible. Then she led me away from the enthusiastic seller by bypassing him.

"That man was desperate to sell those goods," I said as I checked if my goods were still in my arm. Fortunately, it was in my right arm.

"It could have been worse my friend."

"What are you doing here anyway?" I asked, changing the topic.

"Well, I wanted to see a friend."

"Which friend?" I asked.

"Nonso." She avoided my gaze.

"That one, joy...hmm, you need to be very careful about all these boys. What if he wants you to accompany him to someplace, what would you do?" I dipped my voice down for effect.

"Adanna, you love reading meanings to things. You know fully well that I'm not that kind of a girl. All those lousy girls opening their legs for men at the slightest opportunity, just because of BlackBerry. I'm not so poor! I'm not a bitch!" She said in a defensive voice.

I looked at her, or rather, gaped at her. This was Joyce's standard reply every time the subject of Nonso came up. I hoped she was right but I knew deep down she wasn't that sharp, no matter how she acted up at times. The boy in question was older than us with a good six years gap and was termed by many as a notorious player. The game is trying to gamble with the hearts of young unsuspecting girls like Joyce.

"What?" She asked.

"Look, just be careful," I said softly.

"I have heard, Mother Mary. Anyway, my cousins are coming to spend their holiday at my place." She deftly switched topics like an expert poker player.

"Wow!!! That's cool." I said. "It must be pleasant." I smiled at her.

"Yes!" She said with a wide grin.

"Clean up your spare room because this babe is invading!" I announced half-heartedly.

"You must come, o. Don't give me that fake acting. You must turn up." She enforced it in her way.

I smiled at her. "Alright, I am coming!!!" I said with enthusiasm this time.

A couple of people turned our way to see what the shouting, better yet, screaming was all about. I was too caught up with the moment to care.

We high-fived twice. "Now, that's what I'm talking about. I will get the room ready. We will have so much fun, you'd see." She assured me.

I nodded excitedly while giggling with her.

"We sure would. When are they coming?" I asked when I got my voice.

"Next week, Wednesday."

"Should be there by then. I have to go now." I said reluctantly, dreading by the minute what would happen when I got home.

"Sure dear, bye." She hugged me briefly, then she walked deeper into the market arena.

I doubt I'd be allowed to go to Joyce place but there would be no harm in trying...trying. 

When I got home, I did a sign of the cross before entering the apartment. My mom was still in the kitchen. This might not end well, I have wasted an extra six minutes while I was talking to Joyce.

Wearily, I sauntered into the kitchen. "Mom, these are the foodstuffs you sent me to buy." I made my presence known as I dropped the nylon bag on the wooden table.

My mom turned to me so quickly, "Look at how you are walking sluggishly like all your bones have dropped off your body!" She looked at me with disgust. "Someone I sent on an errand. Didn't I tell you to be fast? Instead, you thought I'm a madwoman right? After all, what else can she do? She would rant and close her mouth shut." Mom shook her head from side to side in anger. 

I swallowed hard in panic. I didn't want her wrath to be showered on me this afternoon. I thought of the excuses that I could proffer, but none was forthcoming. She left the pineapples she was peeling and drew near to me. I took a tentative step backwards. 

"I'm sorry mother." I choked out.

"Shut up! Shut your dirty mouth! A nonentity." She sneered. "You move with a group of unserious fellows that have conspired to give me a sore throat! How old are you?"

I was about to talk but she beat me to it. "Sixteen years old!!! Yet, I keep talking like I have a day old child with me. Why? Why? Why were you ushered my way? Good for nothing element with her brain like that of a chicken." 

She drew me by my dress and gave me a thunderous slap across the face. I saw circles for close to five minutes yet I dare not let a drop of tears stain her palm or my dress or at most, let her see my steamed pupils.

The heavens decided to save me because an acute knock sounded just that instant. My mom released me forcefully, leaving me struggling to regain my composure. Taking a deep breath, I left the kitchen to open the door for the person.

"Who is there?" My voice shook. I dabbed my eyes repeatedly to stop the treacherous tears.

"Open the door. It's us." Udonma's voice rang out.

I unbolted the bolt, stepped aside for my siblings to enter the apartment. They walked past me without bothering to greet me. 

"I'm famished," Udo grumbled. 

Unfortunately, mom heard that.

"Your useless sister is the cause. She could not buy what I asked her to buy quickly."

"Sister, why now?" Uzo whined.

I glared at him. "Look sit down all of you, the food would soon be ready."

"Adanna!" Mom screamed.

"Yes, mother." I ran into the kitchen in trepidation. 

"Would you start removing those foodstuffs or do you want us to eat you?"

"No ma." My mom hated me, I knew it as someone chanted it to me continually.

I removed the items from the nylon and placed them in their respective bowls. She told me to buy five packets of Indomie and six eggs, so we could prepare a quick meal to quench my siblings' hunger.

Let me bring to your knowledge that these so-called kids are now old enough to do chores, cook and still be strong. Yet, that wasn't the case in my household. Mom pampered them like each was her only child, giving them all they need at a hat trick. With Udomma aged thirteen, the twins - Chibuzor and Collins aged eleven and lastly the baby of the house, Chinenye aged nine, you can see they've outgrown the age to be pampered.

Despite this fact, the chief of the duties rests on my shoulders. My siblings barely showed any sign of remorse by lending their assistance to make my work lighter. I remember that I started working at the age of seven. According to mom, no food for a lazy person. I felt like an outcast in their midst, I felt like a bought slave. Well, to each their portion in life.

********

Later that night, we were all cosying around in the parlour as we watched YOUR VIEW repeat broadcast on TELEVISION CONTINENTAL. It was one of my favourite programs but to be honest, I loved this part of the day because of my dad. 

I stole a glance at him. He was fixated on the television, trying to make sense of the debaters, Morayo and Tope as he itched his black beards. I couldn't help but smile at that. I turned my attention back to the TV.

"Adanna," Dad called me softly.

"Sir."

"Get me drinking water quickly." He instructed.

I could see he kept swallowing repeatedly, it was one of his numerous habits. I uncrossed my legs, then ran to the freezer to bring out his table water. He was always taking his water directly from the bottle, so I didn't bother getting a glass cup that was perched on top of the fridge on a white tray.

I ran back to him with the item enclosed securely in my right palm. A glance at the television showed that the women had taken the debate to the next level. With Morayo flipping off her wig, Jumoke looked aghast while stalled in between sentences. I smiled softly as I handed my Dad his water. He barely glanced at me as YOUR VIEW ladies stole his attention again.

"Daddy, your water." I reminded him, trying hard not to laugh.

He took it from my hands absently. I guess I knew who I resembled now.

"Adanna is fond of lip service. If your dad wasn't here, you would make me nag so bad. Now you can run, right? Just for you to buy me foodstuff ingredients this afternoon, you went at a snail's pace. I know it's also this program that makes you race like a frog." My mom mocked me.

I smiled sadly because my dad expected nothing less from me and also made sure I kept my mouth shut. My earlier excitement has been squashed like a house of cards. Dad ignored us though and I was a bit grateful for that. I made a move to sit on the floor I vacated but mom had other plans.

"Run to my room and get me my purse and red jotter." Mom snapped.

I heard giggling causing me to look upwards, it came from my siblings. I sighed inwardly as I made my way to the master's bedroom. Returning with the items, I was sent on another errand. It continued like this until the end of the program.

I sank on the floor as dad watched news headlines. Like a bolt of lightning, I remembered that Joyce told me she was expecting her cousins soon. I made up my mind to wing it, it was either now or never. Sincerely, I needed a break.

I took one look at my Dad laughing at something Collins said and closed my eyes unconsciously. I tried to school my breathing to normalcy but that seemed futile.

"Daddy," I said with my sweetest voice.

"Yes?" 

"Do you remember that my friend, Joyce?" I asked carefully.

"Your classmate?" He queried. I nodded quietly.

I was grateful mom had gone to the bathroom just then. 

"Yes, what about her?" I had his undivided attention now.

"Hmm... I was wondering if..." I itched the back of my hair. 

"If?" He encouraged. 

"If I could spend some time with her. Maybe A week?" I spoke in a rush, causing my words to come out jumbled.

"A week?!" He shouted. He was more surprised than angry.

"Yes daddy," I affirmed. 

"You know you have to help your mom with the chores. Let me see what I can do." He delicately itched his beard.

While he thought about it, I chewed on my lower lip to refrain from saying a word.

"You would spend just three days ok." He spoke a last.

I could feel myself breathing again. I was shocked, happy and just feeling giddy. "Thanks, daddy." I threw myself at him, hugging him.

"It's ok. When would you like to go?" he asked.

"Saturday."

"Alright." 

*******

I could feel the glare of the sun on my closed eyelids causing me to roll on my belly facing my pillow. Trying to see if I could get some sleep was futile because sleep has evaporated like smoke out of my body. This was one of the reasons I hated the morning sun. 

I sat up quickly, looked at the wall clock gloomily and sighed. It was 8:45, almost 9 o'clock. My mom would be angry at me this morning. I had overslept, again. I jumped out of bed in haste, ran to the bathroom to rinse my mouth with water. Brushing could wait until I was done with all I had to do.

"Adanna!!!" My mom hollered.

"Yes, mommy!" I answered.

I locked the tap in haste. Hopefully, mom wouldn't be too mad at me today. One could dream but the realization, in this case, was farfetched. Wearing my dark blue slippers that were perched at the back of my door, I left the safety of the room to meet my mom downstairs. 

"Good morning, ma." I greeted, sweeping into a curtsy in the process.

She looked up from the magazine she'd been reading, peering at me like she was wondering who I was. She finally spoke up. "Adanna, how are you? I thought you would sleep a whole day."

"I am ok," I replied, purposely ignoring the second statement.

She dropped the magazine on the table closest to her, then showered her full attention on me. "Adanna, you decided to play a fast one on me yesterday."

I was confused and my face showed it.

"Don't act dumb. You know exactly what I am talking about." She accused, pointing at me. 

"No ma," I argued. My body swayed from side to side like I was drunk but I was just anxious.

She shook her head. "What do you not know? Is it how you trickily made your dad agree to your stupid holiday with that friend of yours? Or the fact that you want me to look like a bad mother to him but your plans have failed." She looked at me with scorn.

My heart pounded as I remembered my whining the previous night. I smacked my forehead inwardly. How could I have forgotten? Was I going to be allowed to visit my friend or mom has succeeded in tucking my dad out of his promise? I looked at her cold face, maybe that was the case and now she was making fun of me while abusing me. I decided to wing it.

"It was not my intention to box you into a corner. You know you were pretty mad at me yesterday and dad is the head of the family." Was I talking too much? I continued, seeing she hadn't spoken yet. "Hmm... I just felt that it was the right thing to do. I'm sorry if I had offended you." I finished lamely, looking down at the floor in the process. 

I heard a taunting clap and looked up to see my mom has gotten up and edged closer to me.

"So, it's me you are talking to in such a disrespectful manner?" She placed a hand on her chest.

"No..." The words had barely left my tongue when I got dealt a hot slap on the right side of my face, causing my face to tilt left. 

I practically saw stars at that moment. A silver tear ran down my right eyelid, my breathing erratic. Nothing felt right, what did I do wrong? Why was everything so difficult and painful for me? Why couldn't I be loved like the rest of my siblings? So many questions but no answer was forthcoming. 

"Stupid girl. If not because of your father, you would have sat home today. Then, I would see what you would do. Get out of my sight!" She grabbed my hands and pushed me forward.

I scrambled out of her presence, dabbing my eyes furiously to stop the shower works from flowing. I made a move towards the stairs, planning on stealing a few minutes for myself just to pull myself together.

"Where do you think you're going? Go and dispose of the refuse, my friend. Your mates are already up and doing while you're just waking up from sleep. Lazy child. While you're at it, make sure you wash all the dirty clothes. I shouldn't catch a glimpse of one unwashed." She ordered.

I turned towards the kitchen, so I can take out the trash. I felt something like a stone hit me right in my spine. I fell over in pain, tears blurred my vision and I didn't bother to clean it off this time.

"Get up or I will use my other slippers to injure you! You want to make all the clothes in this house to get a foul odour, is that not so? Go and wash the clothes before any other thing." She snapped. 

I got up in pain, making sure I don't stand erect to avoid another avalanche of pain. I saw the red sandals near the kitchen door. I almost ignored it but didn't want to be beaten, so I got hold of it tentatively. I walked back to my mom, handing over the slippers which she jerked off my hand.

Going from room to the room had turned the pain into a dull ache and also made me realize that my siblings were still fast asleep. I felt so unloved. Hopefully, Joyce and her family would take off the sadness that seemed to have rested on my thin shoulders. 

Three hours have passed, numerous chores finished, my shower is done and dusted, now all is left is my unpacked clothes to be thrown into my black school bag. I removed my school materials from the bag, then arranged them neatly on my bookshelf. I wouldn't enjoy looking for one of the items.

Opening the wardrobe, I stared at a variety of clothes. My mood was somewhat better though I wasn't deliriously happy just yet. It was good enough to plan though. What and what should I wear? Not that I had a forest of clothes but it was enough.

I brought out a blue sweatshirt and black slacks, which I slung across my left arm. I dived in to get a blue gown that I've been unknowingly eying when my door opened and in sauntered Chinenye.

"Sister, you are so excited about going to Aunty Joy's place. Who is going to do all the house chores?" Her annoying voice rang out.

"How many times have I told you not to talk to me like that?" I snapped.

She hissed, "I have told you mine sha, you need to stay around to work."

I almost hit her when I remembered that our mother would have my head for dinner if I touched her. I decided to ignore her, she wasn't worth wasting my energy on. I focused on the clothes and essentials I needed for my vacation.

"Just know, no matter where you hide, you would come back." She taunted.

"Look at you, if you continue this way, you would end up being useless. Do you think I or my mother would follow you to your husband's house? You are so rude and always feel entitled. If not for mother, I know what I would have done to you. Get out!"

Dropping the clothes on my bed, I walked to her and shoved her harshly from the door, out of my room. She started crying to alert my mom. I was past caring at this point, all I wanted was some peace, not a sharp mouth bimbo. I went back to packing. I wouldn't think about it at all, even though all I wanted to do was cry, cry and cry.

I moved blindly, throwing the clothes into my bag and zipping it shut. Then, I took a cream gown from my wardrobe and donned it on without checking for labels. I couldn't wait to leave this house, it was making me sad and depressed all at once. Swinging my school bag over my shoulder in a haze, I found myself walking down the stairs straight to the kitchen where I heard my mom humming.

"Mommy, I'm ready to go to Joyce's place." My voice sounded foreign even to my ears. 

"So? Why are you screaming? Listen, I do not want you to stay a day more in that place. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, mother." 

Her face seemed set in stone, causing me to shuffle my feet repeatedly. She seemed rooted to the spot, chopping her vegetables. I needed her to drive me to Joyce's house. Moreover, I couldn't leave just like that.

"Mom." I cooed.

"What is it?" She shouted.

I flinched. "I have to start going., I said quietly.

"I can't wait for you to leave. You're good for nothing girl but still have the guts to say my own Chinenye feels entitled. I will let you go now because I am having a headache. When you get to Joyce's place, talk like a puppet. It will be a good thing, so they would send you back to me faster." 

I stared at her. 

"Who are you eying?" She flung the kitchen knife at me. 

I was lucky because I escaped by a fraction. "I never eyed you, mummy." 

"I don't have transport money to give and I can't leave what I am doing either, so bye."

I knew it meant case dismissed. I sighed as I walked out of the house. I was so hungry and tired but I didn't want to stay in that house a second more.