HAZELSitting on the edge of the bed, I sip on a mug of hot tea. The aroma fills my nose while Ramon's soft snores fill my ears. The house is quiet, and since Ramon has fallen asleep I've been stuck alone; thinking.I bring the mug to my lips and then back into my lap. My mind is on a constant replay of everything that has happened to me in the past year. To us. This year seems to be a huge disappointment. Not only were we told that we won't be able to have a baby; that Ramon has been waiting so long for, but the only family we have is dead within a blink of an eye.Without a doubt, I am happy with Ramon. Up until now, I've never hated life. Since this year has began, I don't think that I've stayed genuinely happy in quite a while- and I know that Ramon knows that. I also know that deep down, he is just as unhappy. I just hope that what ever it is, is something we can work through. I love him too much and I'm terrified to even think about him letting me go.I run my fingers through my

HAZELAs the days drag into weeks, and the weeks into months, the only thing coursing through my veins is sadness and the thought of Ramon. I would be alright without him, but the truth be told; I am nothing without that man. He was the one who brought out my happiness, in it's most pure state. The feeling of his embrace was what kept me asleep all night long. Now I find myself waking up every hour of the night, reaching for someone who isn't there. Bertha and Jack always try and keep my mind off of that man, but nothing works. It comes in spurts: I am okay but then five seconds later my mood completely changes. I don't understand how one man can change my life completely.My heart yearns to be with the man that I love, the one who has changed me into a wife, a lycan, and most of all a woman. It was so childish of me to put my own wants before his needs. All he ever wanted was for me to be happy, and I wouldn't even let him get that. I would love to hear from him just one more time. I

HAZELThe car ride home with Ramon is silent. Other than when he tried to start a conversation with me by asking me what the hell I thought I was doing out running while I'm in heat. It really isn't the kind of thing you say to someone who you just left with your friends. Ramon's grip on the steering wheel looks like it's going to break it, and he's going unreasonably fast. I must have pissed him off.When we pull into the driveway, Ramon puts the car in parking mode and turns to look at me. His jaw is clenched, and his hair is a mess. "Please never run off like that again, Hazel. I was worried sick about you." He goes to reach for my arm and I jerk away."You were worried about me?" I furrow my eyebrows. "You didn't call or anything while I was staying with Jack and Bertha. You didn't care how I was doing, so don't you dare say that you were worried sick about me after you got what you wanted from me." I growl loudly. "You, the first time you see me all you want to do is to sleep wit

HAZEL"Did you love her?" I break the silence. Ramon runs his fingers over my face and tucks a chunk of hair behind my ear. It isn't angry. It isn't forced. Everything is calm."Who?" He wonders, scrunching his eyebrows. His eyes search mine for some kind of answer, and he eventually realizes who I am talking about. He lets out a breath and responds."I did." He says softly. "We fall in love with many people in our lives. You are the last love I will meet, for now." He smiles. I knot my eyebrows at him."So eventually you'll move on?" I wonder. "Why didn't that work out?" Ramon shrugs his shoulders."I will never find anyone that compares to you. The only person I can ever love besides you, has to be like you." He kisses my forehead. He doesn't say another word."Can you at least tell me about her?" I wonder out loud. What was she like? What made Ramon want her?"What is there to tell you?" He wonders back to me, confused. When I do not answer him, he speaks up. "I figured you already

HAZELShe was beautiful. Her eyes sparkled like the night sky. Her hair fell down her back as if it were made of silk. I'm sure her skin was soft, and I bet she had the warmest laugh.'Stop it!' She grumbles, inside my head. I can't help but compare myself to the person he had before. She got him. Not me. She was the one who got to carry his heir, not me. She was the one who got told she was the love of his life. Not. Me. I am nothing more than a blueprint that had been lost for ages that had sloppily been built back together. I am not me. I am just a replacement of her.I've always felt this empty void in me, could that be it? Has it been because of her this entire time? I cannot blame her for any of this, as much as I want to. I stare at her picture with a thousand questions in my head. I don't look a thing like her. There is something about her that seems familiar- but I know that's just the wolf's spirit that had resided in the both of us.I think about how much her heart must hav