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Chapter # 11
My eyes slowly opened when the sunlight penetrated through the curtains. I adjusted my vision and the realization hit me like a truck.
I realized that my soul is corrupt now. I have lost my innocence, my purity.
‘I successfully bargained for my virginity.’
I have just survived the most horrendous night of my life. Depression took over me in just one day, I'll turn insane but I have no choice but to keep these feelings in my heart and bear this undesirable feeling of being used over and over again.
I shifted my gaze and saw Christian standing in front of me. My eyes widened in horror as I quickly sat up and pulled the duvet over me to hide my exposed form.
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Toxic Marriage Chapter # 12
My throat dried and my body became numb. Not wanting to face him again, I went to the library again. I began to pace around it in stress.As I was pacing, Samuel came,"Ma'am, Sir is waiting for you in the dining hall." My heart skipped a beat as my body began to shake in fear.I don't want to face him, It's scaring me.I bit my cheeks and went to the dining hall. He was sitting on the head of the house chair. He has changed into a casual shirt and trousers. I muster some courage and walked closer,"Welcome Home." I said in a low voice. He looked at me with a mystifying yet surprised gaze.“What?” He asked, blinking in confusion.
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 13
My eyes flutter open along with an aching pain in my body. I tried to shift but I felt a hand restricting my movements. I bit my lips to bear this repugnant and seething feeling.'What do you truly want?' I turned and saw Christian face so close to mine. My heart skipped a beat as I shifted myself away from him as far as I could but his grip didn't let me go very far.Feeling disgusted, I looked at him with loathe. But his eyes were closed as he was sleeping peacefully.'By destroying my sleep you are enjoying a lull?'I noticed his flawless features that are so appealing that one can bend itself before it. The looks, mastered in capturing anyone just by looking at them beguilingly. As if
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 14
‘I felt good when he touched me.’"I didn't!""I didn't!""I didn't like it!""I hate it! I hate you!"I continued to cry as I felt extreme dislike and revulsion for myself to find this disgusting intimacy pleasurable."I didn't like it.." I said as I leaned on the door, letting the tears fall down.I looked down and after a few seconds, I began to scratch where he touched me. I let out loud sobs of dejection."I didn't like it.""I didn't like it.""I didn't like it."
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 14.2
My petite form continued to convulse as he rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes for a second.“Why..? Am I too harsh? Too rough? I believe I told you to let me know if I am.” He said, tone softening.Everything calmed down in that moment, the tiny spark of affection was shown in him as we remained like that in the dark room. “Was I?” He asked again and swallowing hard, I shook my head in denial.“Then why do you act if I forced you? Didn’t I stop yesterday or before it as well?” He asked with our silence that somewhat, for the first time, serene me as I stopped quivering for a second, looking away.“Do you truly want me to show you how it feels to be forced? I have your written consent and
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 15
Christian POV:-I don't want her to be hurt, I know I hurt her the most but if she hurt herself, I won't be able to face her.I don't want to love her, she can never remove those apprehensions of my heart and I will never let her too. I will do whatever I can, just to make sure that she doesn't love me, even if it involves hurting her.But she hates me even if I have done nothing.That's why I felt relieved when she hated my touch. I was happy that there are no chances that she can love me.She felt disgust and hate for me. That intense detest can never be removed and it worked in my favor as I don't have to go through that feeling of betray
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 16
I know that she doesn't like my touch but still I tried to calm her so that she can relax in my presence but that apparently seemed impossible.She put her head on my shoulder as she continued to weep."T-that wasn't m-my dream." She stuttered as she held my shirt. Soaking my shoulder with her tears."I should be happy about it but I wasn't." She whispered again.Being curious I asked, "What was it about?" She shivered when I asked. She doesn't want to tell. She looked at me hesitantly and I moved my hand from her hairs to her tears as I wiped them. She looked down and said,"You'll be angry." Her voice sounded scared as usual. Being irritated that she is not speaking about it, I still remained patient and said again,"Tell me, I won't be angry." She wiped her last tear as she tried to get away from my laps but I held her and didn't let her. She cringed as I asked sternly, "Who told you to get away?" She looked down and bit her lips as I could feel the fear she had in her heart for
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 17
Sophie POV:-It's almost midnight and my stomach was growling. My dried lips formed a thin line as I was starving and also in a desperate need of sleep but I was waiting for Christian. Seems like he forgot that there's a wife waiting for him.But, Why am I waiting for him? I can eat alone too but somewhere in my heart, I don't want to. More like I can't since he ‘expects’ me to have dinner with him.I sighed and put my head on the dining table and closed my eyes.I wonder why his eyes always flicker with compassion as if even if he wants to hurt me, he can't. Something is pulling him to not to do that. I find it funny, nothing can stop that cold guy, he can break me miserably any moment, there are no restrictions, I gave him all the rights to do it and to be honest, I am afraid of the day he will.‘And somewhere deep down, I think he wouldn’t break me and if he did, I don’t think it would break me physically- my body belongs to him- but emotionally.’He can do anything and can indu
Toxic Marriage Chapter # 18
The next day, I was swinging my legs while sitting on the couch in the library because I am alone in the house and the devil has gone to work.His absence feels like a reprieve from chaos, A short-lived freedom to me.After reading, I leaned back and closed my eyes and remembered him consoling me for the nightmare and later intimidating me about it.I just don't understand him. Why does he pity me? Why does he show little gestures that make me feel like he cares?‘When there isn't any love then why does he refrain himself? There's no need for him to confine himself.’He doesn’t have to make things so complicated.His eyes are always clo
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