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10. Inner turmoil
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The Way You Taste 11. Man of faith
HOLDEN’S POINT OF VIEW Nick and Father are waiting for me in his beautifully decorated office. The walls are covered by bookshelves made of blonde wood, and you can tell the books in there aren’t just for decoration. Father sits in his fancy velvet chair behind his behemoth of a desk, while Nick sits with his legs crossed in one of the smaller chairs across from the desk, his foot fidgeting with impatience. “Alpha,” I greet as I enter the room, and both men look at me. Nick’s eyes and sly smirk show amusement, while Father’s eyes show concern and rage. Well, I’m in for a shitshow. “Explain,” Father says impassively. “Which part?” I ask, trying to play dumb. “Is Willow your mate?” Father sighs exasperatedly, running his fingers through his hair. “Yes,” I reply, dryly. “Oooooooooooh,” Nick chimes in. Father gives him a stern look. “Did you mark her?” Father asks. He sounds exhausted. “No,” I say, my voice a bit higher than usual. “Did you do it?” Nick asks, wiggling
The Way You Taste 12. Girl talk. Well, almost
WILLOW’S POINT OF VIEW Once we get to the barracks, I lock myself in yet another washroom and let the waterworks run free. I weep and wail and sob. My mate regrets having sex with me. I met the most handsome man in the world, and we had the best sex of my life. And he regrets it. The one person who was tailor-made to me by the Goddess regrets having sex with me. He doesn’t want me. Fuck knowing me and wanting me for who I am, not even the mate bond is enough for Holden to want me. And I want him so fucking much. “He wants us, Willow,” Jamie whimpers. “He’s just in denial.” “Well, tough luck. If he doesn’t want me, I don’t want him, either,” I say. This mate bond wasn’t even supposed to happen, anyway. I’m on MBS. Cadets have their mate bonds suppressed so they won’t be distracted. Having Holden as a mate would just be a distraction. I’m going to be the best Cadet ever, and I’m going to carve out the life I’ve always dreamed of. There’s no space in my life for a mate who doesn
The Way You Taste 13. Sleepless in Ontario
WILLOW’S POINT OF VIEW ****RATED R**** As I lay in my bunk bed, a plan starts to form in my head. I’m not giving up on my mate. Not now, not ever. “Hell yeah!” Jamie agrees. The bond is affecting him just as much as it affects me, and he will have to concede eventually. So, I decide to stop being this moping, fearing girl and go back to my confident boss-ass self. I wait for the right time, when everyone else is asleep. I can feel he’s still awake, though, the mate bond really is a gift. “Holden?” I reach him through the mind link. “Willow?” He sounds surprised. His husky voice is a sweet caress. “Yeah. I can’t sleep,” I say. This is weird and uncomfortable. First of all, I’m not used to mind linking anyone else but my parents and my brother. And I’m not at all close enough to Holden to just link him up in the middle of the night. But I’m sure of what I want, and I’m going to be bold and trust this bond. “Me, neither,” he murmurs. “Thinking of me?” I ask in a put-on
The Way You Taste 14. Third chance
HOLDEN’S POINT OF VIEW This is it. I have all the logical reasons why I can’t be with Willow, and I also have all the logical reasons why I can’t reject her. But I won’t live in limbo forever. I won’t reject her, nor will I mark her. I will dissolve the bond. I have a clear view of the situation. I have a new goal in mind: I’m going to focus even harder on the MBS. I’m going to get Willow’s blood samples from the pack lab, all her stats and results, everything. I’m going to take them to Dr. Tremblay and we’re going to work on it together. We’re going to figure it out, and I’m going to have the perfect variation of the drug and all my problems will be solved. “And unicorns and rainbows and pixie dust,” Hendrix snickers, and I ignore him. The best thing about this plan is that it’ll create a distance between me and Willow. This way, I won’t be influenced by the bond. I’ll have my mind clear, and I’ll be able to focus on my research. I’ll spend even more time at the University
The Way You Taste 15. Training day one
WILLOW’S POINT OF VIEW Phase one of my plan was a glorious win for me. Now I have confirmation that Holden wants me as much as I want him. At least sexually. Of course, I’ll continue trying to seduce him, showing him how much he wants me and how good giving in to the bond could be. But that’s not all of it. I’m determined to show him who I am outside of the bond. To make him fall in love with me. Holden Temple, I will show you that I’m not only your mate, but a warrior, a thinker, and a partner worthy of being by your side. Worthy of being in your heart. I will excel in training and college. I will prove my worth not only to Holden, but to the entire pack. With my plan taking form in my mind, I feel a newfound determination burning within me. A new sense of purpose. Jamie jumps around and giggles in my head. She’s on board with my plan, and I think she’s probably even more excited than I am. I fall asleep to dreams of Holden and of my place in this pack. *** I wake up in a
The Way You Taste 16. Fists and sweat
WILLOW’S POINT OF VIEW ***CONTENT WARNING: MILD VIOLENCE (SPARRING)*** I’m not entirely sure what to expect from Callie. I was a bit upset that she didn’t interfere when Harper was talking shit about Xenia. Callie and Harper seem to know each other, I just don’t know yet if Callie is a grade-A bitch, too. My heart races as I step onto the ring. Our eyes meet, and I’m fueled by determination. Her fiery red hair matches the intensity of her gaze. I assess her. She’s on the curvier side, but I know in real life that means nothing. I’m smaller, so I’d guess I could use my speed and agility in my favor. But I can tell she’s confident, as a smirk plays at the corner of her lips. Gamma Rhys’ whistle cuts through the murmurs of the crowd, and the match begins. We exchange a nod, a silent acknowledgment of what’s about to go down. “We got this!” Jamie cheers me on, and I draw strength from her support. I will prove my worth today. I am ready for this. My palms are sweaty. Mom’s spagh
The Way You Taste 17. Understanding my mate
WILLOW’S POINT OF VIEW Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. What could this be about? I scan my head for all the possible reasons why Alpha Michael might want to speak with me. Holden. It has to be about Holden. He’s going to tell me Holden wants to reject me. Dad. He knows who my father is and knows he asked me to keep an eye on the pack. Xenia. Xenia is secretly a hybrid who can’t really perform as well as full-blooded werewolves, so she can’t be in the Cadet Program, and as her cohort mate, I have to deal with it. I try to reach out to Xenia through the mind link, but I keep hitting walls. She wasn’t part of the crowd who left the gym. Come to think of it, I don’t remember seeing her after her fight was over. Is she missing? I only have thirty minutes, not enough time to shower. Instead, I spend those thirty minutes agonizing over the whirlwind of shit that has hit my face in the last two days, mourning the loss of whatever I’m about to lose. I rehearse different speeches to
The Way You Taste 18. Alone with her
HOLDEN’S POINT OF VIEW It’s absolutely insane that I barely even spoke to this girl, and yet, the thought of her makes it impossible for me to focus on anything else. Every time I close my eyes, I see her. Willow. The way her body arched, the scent of her skin, the sound of her voice. The thought of what she tastes like. “We can finally do all that and more!” Hendrix says. I shake my head. Get a grip, Holden. This is about research. Willow is waiting outside the Pack House, dressed in an outfit that seems like it’s crafted from my own fantasies. A fucking pleated skirt and a white blouse. Like a fucking British schoolgirl. The way it clings to her form, revealing just enough to make my imagination run wild. I’m instantly reminded that I didn’t actually get to see her naked when we had sex. “No better place than our lab for that…” Hendrix taunts. “Morning,” she greets me, shooting me a smirk that says she knows exactly what she’s doing to me. I motion for her to follow me
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