The moment Sarah had walked into the school, I was in love. At first, I was a bit dumbfounded. How could I be in love with a human? I knew she wasn’t a wolf. You could smell humans from miles away. She had this intriguing air about her.
We were fifteen when we met and life seemed uncomplicated and adventurous. That first week, I followed her home every day. I wasn’t stalking her, maybe a little, but not the dangerous kind of stalking.
I was fascinated by her and try as I might, I couldn’t get her out of my head. She came up to me one day during lunch and simply asked, “When are you going to ask me out?” That was how Sarah and I had started dating.
Sarah wasn’t a one-time thing for me, it wasn’t cheap. What we shared was special. When I first met Sarah, I wasn’t a wolf, meaning, I hadn’t yet shifted into a wolf. I was purely human, a special human, but nonetheless still human and so was she.
Before we turned sixteen, we would make out and hold hands. After my initial resurrection though, something else had woken up inside me. I felt everything more intensely, love, anger, lust, and hate.
She felt it too when we reunited after those three months. There was a passion between us and even though I had planned to break up with her at that first meeting, instead we ended up going a little further than usual. I tried to create a place for Sarah in my life where our relationship would be acceptable. I failed miserably.
At school we walked hand in hand to classes and it was obvious to everybody but us that we would date, even before we started dating. She was a cheerleader and even though I didn’t partake in sports, I was seen as a jock.
It was only natural that we would gravitate toward each other and become a couple. It had been obvious to James as well, but he approved about as much as Malachi did. I couldn’t blame him though, he was my Beta, and a stickler for following the rules.
In the cafeteria, the basketball and football team dragged five tables together and that was where we sat during lunch. The staff eventually just left the tables as they were and it became the table where we would sit every day of our high school careers. The cheerleaders joined us when Sarah and I started dating and after we broke up, they moved with Sarah to another table.
We were both popular at school and I had plenty of friends, some of them that would say I was with them even when I wasn’t. It became easier and easier to lie and say I was with someone other than Sarah.
I would drive Sarah home after school and most afternoons we were alone at her house. It would always end in a make out session of mutual exploration. I was her first serious boyfriend and she was my first serious girlfriend. I met her parents and they liked me. I had good manners and I was always respectful of them and of Sarah.
The first and only time Sarah and I had sex, was an unforgettable afternoon as we stumbled our way to her bed, fumbled with each other’s clothes and didn’t even think of using protection. In the heat of the moment we both just didn’t think.
We took our time and we kissed and touched. We weren’t shy and when she nodded her agreement as I hovered on top of her I was high on the intensity of our feelings for each other. Yeah, I was being a complete idiot, going against everything I believed in.
“I love you,” she said to me on that fateful afternoon as we lay on her bed naked and I smiled. We had gone all the way. It was a special moment that we shared.
“I love you too,” I said to her and we kissed again. It was true. I did love Sarah and I believed that she loved me too. That’s why I would be ashamed of my actions in the months leading up to and following her death forever.
I usually showered when I got home before I had to meet Malachi at the den for training. That specific afternoon was different. Malachi was in the kitchen when I came home late. I had lied to him and said I was meeting Sam.
It happened so fast and one moment I was looking at my father and the next moment I was fighting an Alpha wolf. He had smelled her scent on me, and carnage broke out. I was on the losing end of that fight and my father had lost his mind.
Facing a fierce Alpha in wolf form is no joke and I had no choice but to try and defend myself. Malachi was much larger than I was and he came at me ferociously. As I shifted I found myself pinned down and bite after bite rained down on me.
“Malachi!” Karani screamed at him.
Just as quickly as Malachi attacked, he retreated, and left me to lick my wounds. That surprised me because his anger towards me had been intense. It had threatened to choke me as I breathed his emotions in.
Karani hadn’t been pleased that her kitchen got ruined in the process of that fight. It was the first time I had seen Malachi as an aggressive Alpha wolf. To this day, it’s something that I can’t quite put together, the calm lawyer and the aggressive wolf that he could be when it was needed.
My wounds would start to heal but Karani cleaned them anyway. She shook her head sadly and I could feel her sadness in myself and see it in her aura. That was probably the moment that the realization hit me. I had hurt my mother.
Malachi had called me into his study. That was always where I got my lectures from him, but this time Karani followed me inside and went to stand at his side. That was definitely a first.
“You can’t keep seeing her,” Malachi said very calmly.
“She’s human and you might hurt her. That will cause problems for the entire pack.” He was right, of course, but how could I tell him that I loved her? How could I tell him that she was different from other humans?
“I tolerated your relationship with her before you shifted. Now, it’s just unacceptable,” he said to me and I looked down. He had known the whole time.
“Dad, I…” I couldn’t finish that sentence, the guilt was eating me up inside. The wolf guilt.
“Kiran, we love you, you know that. We just want what’s best for you, best for everyone.” Karani was looking at me intently.
“You’re a wolf, the next Alpha. This cannot happen again.” Karani had a way of getting her way and that was the end of that.
Even now I can still remember the look in her eyes, the smile on her lips as our fingers intertwined and how she felt in my arms. I don’t think I’ll ever forget, I can’t forget, and I won’t let myself forget. It was my greatest shame, and the most damning mistake I ever made. Regret came too late for me.
I sent Sarah a text and asked her to meet me at our spot. Our spot wasn’t really a spot, it was just a clearing in the forest furthest away from our house where the roots of an old tree were visible in the earth and it made a natural buttress.“Hey, you,” she said, and smiled sweetly as I arrived, and found her waiting near the tree.I had switched off my feelings for her before I even entered the woods, because I knew that this was going to be hell. She put her arms around my waist and I knew her next move would be to kiss me. We’d been dating for almost two years now, and our familiarity with each other was intimate.Our relationship was more than just making out in odd places. We could talk for hours about our future, our dreams, and what we wanted out of life. Sarah wanted to be a teacher. She loved the idea of being there at the crucial time when young minds were shaped.“What’s wrong?” she asked me when my arms didn’t encircle her like they always did.“We can’t keep seeing each
We had a few other wolf children that went to the same school as us and I made a point of it to look out for them. There were two other families that lived in Seward that weren’t part of our pack, they were lone wolves and preferred the lifestyle.In an attempt to appear as if I was doing fine, I had started dating one of the girls from our pack but it was just for show. We didn’t hang out after school or even hold hands. James disapproved and he made it known almost every day.“Dating Michelle won’t change anything.” We were driving to school and I looked out of the passenger side window and thought about what I was going to say.“I know, but have you seen the way Sarah still looks at me?”It took all my strength to ignore Sarah at school. We had the same friends and the same classes, and it took all my resolve not to break my promise to Malachi. I should have known better because Malachi expected me to be better.“Do you want her to hate you?” James’ question was valid and I thought
I was startled awake, drenched in sweat. Death had been visiting me again. He was stalking through my house, walking from room to room. I didn’t know if it had only been a dream or if it was a sign. I had no inkling that my life would soon change forever.I sat down at the breakfast table and looked at my mother. Her aura was clear, by that I mean it didn’t have death lurking about. I exhaled not realizing that I had been holding it in.“How are things at school?” Karani asked. I hadn’t been home all that much, and it wasn’t due to training or Alpha lessons.“It’s okay, you know, same stuff every day.” I smiled at her.“I’m sorry you miss Sarah so much.” She had a way of just knowing everything. I nodded my head but said nothing. She knew I wasn’t seeing her anymore; I didn’t have to tell her.“Where’s Dad?” I asked and looked toward his study.“He already left for work, but he said he’d see you at the den later.”The den was where I met my father every afternoon to fight. No gloves a
“What’s up with you?” James asked me. He was connected to me in a way that only wolves could understand. We would probably die together one day, that’s how close we were.“Sarah’s pregnant,” I said flatly, and told him the whole story. He was probably the only person that would understand everything. He nodded at all the right places and eventually agreed with me, getting rid of that baby was the only thing to do. I knew it wasn’t right but nothing about that situation was right.“Come on, I know what’ll take your mind off everything. Sam’s having a party tomorrow night,” he said with that wicked smile of his.Another shiver ran down my spine, ‘I should stay home,’ said that little wolf voice inside my head. On the other hand, getting out and having a drink or two might not be the worst thing. Tomorrow was the last day of school and we had some vacation time to look forward to.I arrived home an hour before the party started and I took a quick shower and dressed. I was picking James
We were all in the living room, standing to one side. Marilyn was in the crowd dancing as she kept looking at me and James had just rolled his eyes. Her moves were suggestive but for some reason I wasn’t keen on hooking up with her again.Jasmine walked towards us and I could see that she had been drinking too much. I didn’t want a confrontation over Sarah but she stumbled into my arms and giggled non-stop as I steadied her. She chose that moment to kiss me in front of everybody, she was also Sarah’s best friend and I pushed her away. I could feel Sarah’s eyes on me and when I looked up at her she had tears in her eyes.Sarah walked up the stairs and I just stood there, watching her go. Her aura slowly turned black, and I froze. Death. Confusion took a hold of me because Sarah had never been to my house, yet Death had been lurking there.I chalked it up to being emotional and angry and I convinced myself that my imagination was playing tricks on me. I walked back to where James and Sa
Malachi tried to keep my routine as normal as he could. That meant, training at the den, every day. I wallowed in self-pity, and the prospect of training didn’t lighten my mood.“You have to focus,” he said as his bare fist landed on my nose, and a trickle of blood appeared.“I’m trying to,” I replied, and brought my hands up to protect my face. His punch caught me in the ribs, and I grunted, and felt it break. Malachi had no mercy on me. Another punch came for me and I managed to block it, but missed the punch that caught me on the side of my head.Malachi stopped and looked at me. “It’s no use trying to train you when you fight like a three-year-old girl.” He grinned at me and I returned his grin. He loved his insults especially if they added to my humiliation.We got into Malachi’s Navigator and drove home to shower. Karani just gave us a look as she saw the blood from my nose and told Malachi to take it easy on me. Tomorrow would be a rough day for me.It was the day of Sarah’s fu
Her name was Adara, and she was broken. That’s the thought she woke up with every morning. She didn’t need to tell herself that, it had been beaten into her ever since she could remember. Her mother, Juniper, was a weak woman. Nobody knew what had happened in her life to make her that way, she didn’t talk about the past at all.The only family Adara had in this cold world was her mother and her stepfather, Ramos. She didn’t remember hugs or kisses or even birthday parties. Soon she would be seventeen, and then it was just one more year until she could leave – if they let her leave.She didn’t have many memories from her childhood, almost like something or someone had made her forget, and sometimes she felt that someone inside her was missing. It was something that always felt just outside her reach and at times she wondered if she was going crazy.At first, it was just Adara and Juniper, alone in a small apartment. If she didn’t do the laundry or clean the apartment, it simply wouldn’
“Adara!” She jerked her head up at the foreign voice calling her name.“Yes, Miss Jackson?” Everyone in class was laughing at her. She had fallen asleep at her desk. Again. The bell rang, and Miss Jackson told her to remain seated as everyone else left the class.“Adara, is something wrong at home?” she asked so gently that Adara burst into tears. She always sat at the back of each class. She never talked to anyone. She did just enough to avoid being noticed. How was it that she noticed her? Where had she gone wrong?“No, Miss Jackson. I just went to bed very late last night.” She tried to give her a convincing smile and shrug of the shoulders like a regular teenager would.“I want you to go see the school counselor. You sleep in class every day. You don’t involve yourself with anything at school, and I can see that you’re losing weight. Your eyes have dark circles under them.” She studied Adara carefully and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Some people could be so compassionat