Chapter 4: I Don't Do Diapers

Love is in the air! Austin King was spotted coming out of a jewelry store last week right after he was photographed again with Bren O'Neil. Will wedding bells be ringing soon?

"Take fifteen guys. We're going to go over this and get set up for the next song," their producer's voice came through the headphones.

The adrenaline still coursed through Austin's veins causing him to bounce on the balls of his feet to work off the excess energy. He loved being in the studio, loved creating something new. The music they were recording was different, had a new edge to it, and it was killer. Their manager had worried when they started to veer from their original pop style, but the fans had loved it and were asking for more.

As they made their way to a room that was set up with sofas and tables, Austin grabbed his phone and checked it for messages. He skipped over one from his dad and went to the one from Bren. She was letting him know she landed in Italy, and that she missed him. Yeah, he was screwed when it came to her. He hadn't told her they needed to cut ties altogether before she left, and he slept with her, something he swore he wouldn't do. If he actually wanted a relationship, he might consider one with her. She was sweet to him when she didn't have to be, and he enjoyed her more than most women. He wasn't a relationship kind of guy, though, so it didn't matter. With Bren due to be gone for a couple months, he hoped she'd wise up and realize what an ass he was. He wasn't the man for her.

"Any plans for the weekend?" Wil, one of his bandmates asked.

"Nah. I had time the other day to go get my sister a gift for her birthday, so I'm totally open."

"Hate to beat a dead horse," Nate, the leader of the group said, "but what's going on with the whole Amanda thing?"

That was the million-dollar question right there. Running a hand through his hair, Austin sighed. "Should get the DNA results today or tomorrow. Dunno what's taking them so long, but yeah. If I didn't know better, I'd swear she asked for the slowest service possible just to delay it."

"Just let us know if you need anything. We're here for you," Wil told him.

"Not diaper duty though," KT filled in. "I don't do diapers."

"Thanks, guys."

After laying down the track for another song, Austin was headed home and ready to just veg out. He loved recording, but his voice was shot, and he was ready to put his feet up and just relax. When he and KT walked through the front door of their building, the doorman let him know there was a letter for him. Staring at the envelope that held a piece of information that could potentially alter his life, he headed up to his place trying not to freak out. Sure he wanted this to be over, but now that it was the moment of truth, he wasn't sure he was ready. Once inside he grabbed a beer and took a seat at the bar. Taking a long pull from the bottle, he stared the envelope down.

"What's up?" KT asked as he pulled a bottle of water from the fridge.

Austin gestured to the paper on the bar in front of him with his head.

Grabbing the envelope his eyes got wide. "It's here? Think I'll have beer too."

Swallowing the beer in his mouth, he nodded. "Yeah."

"You gonna open it?"

"Thinkin' about it."

"What's holding you back? Isn't this what you've been waiting for?"

Austin shook his head. "There's no going back after I open that. If it says I'm Finn's dad, then I've gotta cut the shit and step up more. My mom would kick my ass if I weren't a dad to that baby."

"But if you aren't, you can move on and put this all to rest."

"Yeah."

"Want me to do it? We can do it like you're on Maury. I'll sit here all serious, look at the paper for ten minutes, and then in a really dramatic way tell you if you're the father."

"Give me that, asshole." Grabbing the envelope, he slipped his finger under the edge and tore it open. "Here goes nothing." As he opened the papers, he saw pages explaining the results, but all that mattered was that according to the test there was no way he was the father of Amanda Marks' baby.

There were so many emotions slamming through him. He was excited, relieved, and oddly enough, he was sad. He didn't know how to explain the fact that he was sad that a baby he didn't think he wanted wasn't his after all. As he sat thinking about how his mom had found out about it all on a talk show, all the times he'd been accused of not caring about his child, and all the crap he'd been through, the anger built. He grabbed his phone and found Amanda's number determined to get to the bottom of this once and for all. When she answered the phone, though, he could hear little Finn screaming in the background, and it softened his heart. He really did feel bad for the little guy.

"Austin." She sounded exhausted.

"Amanda. We need to talk."

"What's up?"

"Did you not get the DNA results today?"

"Oh, yeah, but I haven't had a second to even sit down much less open that. I take it you have."

"Yeah, I have, and do you know what it says? It says there's no way I'm the father of your baby."

"I know." She sniffed.

What the fuck? "You... you know?!"

"Yeah, I'm really sorry about all this."

"Sorry? You're sorry?! You've put me through hell for months, and you're sorry?!"

"I can explain."

The sarcasm oozed out. "Well, by all means, please, explain."

"I'd rather do it in person. I don't want to have this conversation on the phone."

"I'll give you half an hour, and I shouldn't even give you that."

"Can I come now? I'd rather just get this over with."

"Whatever," he told her right as he disconnected the call.

If Austin weren't so mad, the look on KT's face would be comical. "Please tell me I heard it all wrong?"

Austin shrugged. "What'd you hear?"

"That you're not the father, but Amanda already knew that without the test."

"Yeah, that's pretty much the gist of it." It sounded worse when it was said out loud by someone else. What would the press say when they got wind of this?

"Damn, that's messed up."

"Yup."

KT went around to the fridge and grabbed them both another beer, and he tipped it back and chugged. He was going to need something much stronger to get through this.

By the time he'd finished his third beer, Amanda was at the door with a sleeping Finn.

"He likes the motion," she explained. "Some nights I have to take him out just so he'll stop."

As much as it went against everything he was feeling, Austin needed to let her in. If he was ever going to get to the bottom of this, then he had to at least hear her out. He opened the door wider so she could enter, and followed her into the living room.

"Austin, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen, and I didn't want to hurt you."

"You named me as the father of your baby, and you knew it wasn't true. How could you not mean for it to happen?"

"The night I got pregnant with Finnegan was one I'd like to forget, but I won't ever regret him. He's all the best parts of me. It was the night I told you that we had sex, but we didn't. You were really drunk in your room and nothing happened between us."

He tried again to put the pieces of that night together, and he got nothing. There were a lot of nights in his recent past that blurred, and now that this had happened, it scared him. Knowing it was a problem and doing something about it were two different things. He'd been trying recently, but because he wasn't drinking as much, he was sleeping with Bren. It didn't take a genius to figure out his ways of coping were totally messed up.

"That night was crazy here, and everyone was having a good time. I had gone to the bathroom and when I came out, there was someone there waiting for me. He pushed his way in, and at first, I really liked what was going on, but when it got a little rough, I asked him to stop. He didn't, and that's when... I got pregnant. He left as soon as he finished. I was so upset I just needed a minute. I ran to your room thinking it was empty. You were there, though, and you could tell something was wrong. You didn't ask questions, you just pulled me into your bed and held me. I tried to get away because I was scared, but you told me that sometimes when you were sad or upset, you just wanted a hug, to feel someone hold you. You passed out soon after that, but I laid there for a bit just letting you comfort me. You weren't all there, and I knew it, so even though I'd just been through what I had, I felt safe. When the rumors started, I knew the question of who Finnegan's dad would be coming, but I didn't think they'd put me on the spot like they did that day. It was all out of the blue since I hadn't officially announced my pregnancy; I thought they weren't going to talk about it. When they started pushing me, it brought back all those bad memories, and I just blurted out your name without thinking. You were my safe place that night, and I guess I just said what I wished instead of what I knew to be the truth. I know it was horrible for me to do, and I can't tell you how sorry I am."

Austin sat and listened to what Amanda was telling him, and he was pissed, pissed at the guy who put her in this situation to start with and pissed that she didn't trust him in the beginning. It was a big mess, and if she'd just been honest... well, he wasn't sure what would have happened. At least hearing her side of the story walked him back off the cliff. He knew it was just a shitty situation all around. "You didn't think to tell me all this before we did the DNA testing?"

"Would it have mattered?"

"If you mean would I have still gotten a test, yeah, I would have. But I wouldn't have been so pissed off and fighting with you all the time. Amanda, I want to hate you and hug you all at the same time. I don't know what to do."

Amanda gave him a small smile. "You're such a sweet guy, Austin. You don't have to do anything. I knew this was going to happen, and I did it anyway. It's my fault. I'm just sorry you got caught up in it. I really am. You were really good to me that night even if you don't remember it. It's been bothering me, and I'm just glad it's all out so you can get on with your life."

"I was ready to call you every name in the book, but I'm not going to. If you need anything for Finn, let me know. I hate the idea of you having to raise him on your own."

"Finnegan. And thank you."

"Yeah."

Austin looked at the sleeping guy in the car seat. He looked so sweet and peaceful, and he would have been proud to raise him if he were his son.

"I know we've been fighting a lot recently, but you're a real stand up guy, Austin. There aren't many who'd take this news as well as you."

"You'd have to thank my mom for that. She deserves the credit."

"Well, Finnegan and I are going to head out. I can't tell you enough how sorry I am. I really didn't mean for all this to blow up like it did. I hope I can find a way to make it up to you sometime."

"Amanda?" When she looked back, Austin smiled at her. "Maybe we can just hang out sometime. I'd like to play with the little guy, maybe teach him about being in a band."

"I'd like that."

As she left he tried to wrap his head around everything that had happened and what Amanda had told him. He wanted to be mad at her for lying, but under the circumstances, he couldn't be. He knew that he'd have been understanding and helped her hide what was going on if she had come to him with the truth. Instead, he was going to have to chalk it up to a shitty situation and call it done. He couldn't let it consume him. He had other fish to fry.