I stood and left for her room. When I got to her door, I had to knock and within a second she invited me in.
"If you are here to talk me out about you going to live with your sister then you better turn back and leave my room, Jen"
"Mummy but you know that I can't possibly go to my sister's place. I am an adult for crying out loud, how will you expect me to go and live with her as big as I am? It seems you have forgotten that I am your last daughter who needs to be pampered. You know that if I go to my sister's place, she won't pamper me like I am supposed to be pampered"
I whined, nearly dropping a tear.
Mum shook her head and look at me
"Jenny stops whining and go and pack your bags, you leave tomorrow morning. I was thinking of giving you until the end of the week but by the way, you are going, you are leaving tomorrow morning because if you stay another day, you might convince me for you to stay back."
She paused and stared at me hard in the face.
"Look at it this way, it's your sister we are talking about here. She is heavy with a child and will be due any moment, Jenny. It is the least you can do for her, you are not staying here forever and I am not going to talk about this again. Please leave me alone."
I saw that there was no way I was going to convince her so I gave up and left the room frowning.
"A whole me will go and live with a grown-up who is old enough to look after herself."
I fumed while on my way to my room.
I got to my room to see my phone screen blinking, it was ringing. Had it been I did not come into the room I would not have realized that it is ringing. This bad habit that had refused to leave me, leaving my phone on don't disturb mode.
"Hello Tasha, what's up?"
"Hello, baby girl! what's up with your voice, you sound like you are down?"
The voice of my best friend ran cheerfully at her end.
"It's nothing, Tasha. How are you by the way? Why are you calling?"
"Don't tell me that trash, I know when something is wrong with you"
She said obviously.
"Is that obvious?"
I asked, sitting on the bed.
"Of Course, it is obvious, Jen. So tell me, what is it?"
She insisted I tell her what my problem is.
"Mom insist I go live with Susan for a while"
I told her and she went silent.
"No way baby girl, you know you can't"
She said after a while.
"I know right and I had tried to talk to Mom about it but she would not hear. She wants me to go. Tasha, you know if I go I will be doomed. I don't know what to do"
I said, almost crying.
"I know right? Did you tell her the reason you don't want to go?"
"Tasha, I did not. You know I can't possibly do that."
I said and she sighed. I could imagine how sorry she would be looking on my behalf.
We both were silent for a while.
"I think you should go, you are way too big to continue to live in the past, girl. It's been two years now or thereabout and I believe he has moved on so why don't you move on? I think you going there will make him realize that he missed something great. He is the loser, not you"
Tasha said after some time.
"Tasha, I am not strong enough. I can't do it. I have tried to move on but I can't. Each time I remember that I lost him, I pity myself. Going there will open more wounds that refuse to heal."
"Jenny, listen to me. You are a big girl and big girls don't sulk about things in the past. Zain ditched you for your sister, so what?. Don't be a dummy. You are going and that's final"
She did not listen to me and hung up.
I looked around and felt my blue bedspread, how I nearly spread it without any line showing.
I chuckled and frowned when I remembered that I had not solved my problem. The last person I would want to stay under the same roof is my brother-in-law, Zain.
I had not been able to heal from the pain of the past.
"You are not fleshy like you sis and she has got the curves, you know. I love ladies that are big but you, my darling are not big"
The words hurt like hell, they can't get out of my head. No matter how hard I tried. Each time I remember Zain, those hurtful words he said to me in our last meeting, taunt me. It breaks me more, I had tried everything I could to let go but the past would not leave me.
No one really understands what I am going through except Tasha. She was there for me through it all.
When Zain ditched me for my sister, depression nearly killed me but Tasha made sure I did not give up on myself.
It hurts to see the only man you ever craved, choose someone else over you. He made it clear that I was not his type anymore. This is someone I gave my first time, I know that is not a factor but it was because I loved him that's why I allowed him to sleep with me.
I could die the world for Zain, I went clubbing because of Zain. I turned into a bad girl to please Zain and what did he do? He told me to my face that I was not his type. He was just passing time with me and before my eyes, he wedded my sister.
I know I am an idiot for not forgetting someone who had hurt me but the truth is, I love Zain with my life. I love him even though he is married to my sister.
Please, how do you expect me to go to such a place? To be seeing a man that I can only love but can't have simply because he is married. It's going to be damned hard. This is going to be the hardest thing I will ever do in my life.
"Hey pretty, can I have a word with you?""Sure"My fourteen-year-old self replied. I was fifteen when I met Zain. I had gone out with Tasha for sightseeing. Like we always do every Saturday. I was in second to my final year in high school and I would be graduating the next year. My mom mentioned several times to me, no boys until you are done with high school. I had no problem with that because I was not attracted to any boy and I did not think I would until I am done with high school. But meeting that handsome hot dude, asking for directions that hot afternoon changed my plans of no boys till I am done with high school. He was too hot to be ignored. If Tasha was with me, she would not have allowed me to talk to Zain. She has gone to get ice cream for both of us. I was standing by the roadside dressed in one of my baggy tops and a pair of black rugged jeans and white sneakers. I was quite looking boyish in those attires but I did not fucking care because I had never dress
Moris chuckled and circled me in his arms, "You don't want to admit that you want the same thing I want. You always play hard to get" HE said and bit my earlobe. I cringed inside, I was irritated by the act. I would not say I love Moris but I enjoy having sex with him. He knows how to fvck you until you become numb and that has been the only thing keeping me attracted to him. Apart from sex, he has nothing else to offer. You would be surprised that I am this girl who loves sex to the extent that it has to be the reason I have to keep a man. I tell you, that's what Zain turned me into. I would say he showed me a world of sex and after we broke up, I continued sleeping with men thinking that I would get over him but the more I had sex the more miserable I became and when I wanted to stop, Moris came into the picture and took me on another rollercoaster of sex, a whole new level and I almost forgot about Zain. There is no style of sex position I have not tried with Moris. I am
I looked around her small sitting room and chuckled at how she arranged everything in order. She is a very neat woman and little things matter to her. She is not that old, I think mom is three years older than her. She lives here alone with the twins, Mitchell and Michael while her two other kids, all grown, live outside the neighbourhood. She is a single mom. Nothing really changed, it's almost the same as it was the last time I came here. I heard noises and looked up to see the twins running towards me with excitement. "Auntie Jenny, you decided to come to visit us today. We have missed you"They both said and jumped right on me at once. I circled them in my arms and giggled. "I missed you both so much, how are my prince and princess doing?" "We are fine"They both replied and released me then each sat by my side. "We are starting our new school soon and we were hoping that you would go with us to see the school"Michelle said looking hopefully and my heart shatte
Her phone did not have to ring for long before she picked up the call. "Jen, you have not been answering your calls, why?" I stared at my pants. There is no atom of acknowledgement. All she cared about was why I did not pick up her calls."I went out for a while, sis. Is there a problem?"I asked her with my voice void of emotions."Yes, as a matter of fact, there is a problem but I would not say it's a problem. I believe by now mom had told you that you would be staying with me for a while. The thing is, Zain is in town and would be visiting Mom so that you both would leave by tomorrow, I was calling you to tell you to pick few of your things" I was speechless. "Why sis?""Why what Jen? I don't believe you would be asking me this question. It's not like you are staying here for your whole life, it's just for a few months" I blinked and let my tears flow. I see that mom and Susan are bent on making my life miserable. So going to stay with Susan is not enough torment for
Mummy stared at me indicating I should go check who is at the door. Who else? If not the unwanted visitor tonight. I stood up gingerly and walked towards the door with shaky legs. Have not seen him and I am behaving like this. What happens if I get to see him, the earth will swallow me then. While I was walking, I was counting numbers in my mind to calm my nervousness. I was damned nervous and I know it and obviously anyone who sees me at the moment will know that I am nervous. "Jenny, you are over him"I restored to saying and it worked like magic because my nervousness stopped. I got to the door and exhaled then inhaled and like the lady who had got her feelings under control, I opened the door to reveal Hot Zain at the door. No doubt the dude is cute, his handsomeness can't be measured. I stared at him with no expression on my face and when it was obvious he was not going to come in, I stepped aside and invited him in. "Come in please, brother-in-law"I said with a charm
Jenny's point of view…. Day 2…...Next morning I opened my eyes and closed them back. It was morning but I did not feel like waking up. I wanted to escape reality, there was no way I could do that, only if I were dead. I thought about it, will being dead be better than being under the same roof with Zain? The latter was the best so I opened my eyes again and stared at my suitcase I left at the feet of my closet. I did not get to pack my clothes yesterday, hopefully, I will do it now before we leave. I don't believe we will be leaving so soon. I yearned and let myself out of the bag."Morning Jenny, welcome to a brand new day, my love"I said to myself and chuckled. Someone seeing me will think I was talking to another person. It's my way, I have always talked to myself like a third person since I was a teenager. I walked to the closet and opened it wide and stared at the clothes in there. Most of them I bought myself, and at fifteen, mom stopped getting things for me. All s
Zain's point of view…. Outside her door, I strengthen myself up and put on a smile to mask the hurt in my eyes. Going into her room was just to say good morning. I can't tell if I was compelled inside her room but I just found myself in her room. Her attitude shows that she has been over me for a long time. She used to be this sweet lady, I was her king then. I guess time and circumstances change people. I would blame myself rather than blame her. I hope her stay in my house would make us be on good terms, we could be friends not entirely an enemy. I signed repeatedly and walked back into my room to get ready. We should leave early because I have got an appointment with my friend later in the day.Jenny's point of view….. I was done dressing. I had to dress like a good girl for Zain not think I am still the bad girl he made me and besides mom would not see me dressed anyhow, she would think I am going to seduce Zain. You know after high school, I could dress anyhow and she
I strengthened my clothes and walked out of my room not without taking a last glance at it. Would not be seeing it for the next couple of months. I heard voices in the dining room and I could recognize those three voices. With puffy cheeks, I walked into the dining room and Moris and Zain were seated with a coffee mug in front of them and mom sitting opposite them. The atmosphere I met was lively and I did not see reasons why it should be so. Zain had his gaze on me but I ignored him. I looked at Moris but he had eyes on mom and I did not feel comfortable about it. He should have had his eyes on me but he pretended as if I was not in the room. I should not feel bad about it because I know that it is not sex, there is no Moris and me. I sat down beside mom and she smiled at me. "I was beginning to think you don't want to come out"She said and I gave her a small smile. "No mom. Why would you say that? I know going to sis's place does not sit well with me but I would not