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Chapter 15: Portia
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Family Ties Chapter 16: Portia
The silence between us was deafening. I'd kill to crank up the stereo and drown it out with an angry playlist that would change my mood and help me work through the nagging in my mind. But this wasn't my car, and Jude wasn't the one driving. I wasn't sure Bart would appreciate me synching my phone to his stereo so I didn't have to talk to him.When he'd said it was okay, he'd meant it. Now, he didn't say anything further. But I just couldn't leave it alone. Maybe I wanted to tell someone so I could let my feelings go. This could be my opportunity to do just that-all I had to do was open my mouth and speak. "Judgment-free?"Bart came to another stop-approximately seven feet from the last one we'd made-and turned in my direction. With a look I'd only seen from one other person, his eyes spoke to me in quiet contemplation. "Always. You never have to ask." I pulled my hair down and combed through it with my fingers before I wound it back into a knot on top of my head. It was a ne
Family Ties Chapter 17: Jude
A week later, Portia still avoided me and kept her text messages short. I tried to act as though nothing had happened, yet it seemed that tiny kiss sent her far away. The closeness we'd always shared now strained under the weight of my actions, and I didn't know how to fix it. Other than Portia, I had a total of two friends. Ethan and Carson. The three of us had grown up together. We'd gone to the same elementary school and middle school, and with only one high school in our small town, we landed there as classmates, as well. They hadn't met Portia until the start of our freshman year. Even though they knew of her, and heard me talk about her, their paths didn't cross since I didn't see them when I was at the Shaws' house. Ethan was insanely intelligent even though common sense wasn't his strong suit. Carson was bright and street smart. Though we looked nothing alike, we were all similar in that we'd been outcasts early on and remained that way. Our friendships were forged by that a
Family Ties Chapter 18: Jude
Since I'd never been drunk, and this was my first experience being high, I didn't quite grasp that reaching out to Portia in my current state wasn't the best idea. She'd kept me at arm's length, responding to texts with short answers, but I hadn't been brave enough to call. I had a hard time hearing her voice-it made me miss her-so I'd avoided phone calls since she left. When I got home from Carson's, I snuck into my room and locked the door. Any witness to my behavior might believe I was part of a covert operation...or possibly breaking and entering. I hated to think just how sketchy I appeared from an outsider's perspective. I grabbed my cell from my backpack and searched for a place to hide. Ernie was at work, and Hensley's car wasn't here when I'd shown up, so I wasn't sure who I was hiding from; it just made sense. The closet proved to be my best choice for full coverage. I didn't bother with the light and closed myself in. The glow of the screen illuminated the small space eno
Family Ties Chapter 19: Jude
It had taken me all of three weeks to break whatever agreement I'd made with Portia not to smoke pot again. The truth was, I thought all her vibrato was overkill. It came from a place of concern, but if marijuana was legal in a handful of states and decriminalized in several more, it couldn't be the death sentence Portia made it out to be. Cancer patients had used it for years to fight nausea and pain. And I was proof it warded off mental anguish, as well.My grades hadn't suffered, Ernie and Hensley were none the wiser, and it hadn't affected my ability to take care of my responsibilities. In fact, the more I smoked, the happier my foster parents believed me to be. I'd simply made a mental note not to call Portia after school, and since we texted most of the time, it didn't matter, anyhow.Portia: I'm coming home this weekend.Me: Are you actually staying the whole weekend or is it a quick trip?Portia: Depends. Can you keep your hands to yourself?Me: Do I have to?This w
Family Ties Chapter 20: Portia
Jude's easy acceptance of my relationship status stung. I didn't know what I had expected, some sort of fight, hesitation, anything to indicate his kiss had meant something. Jude wasn't Chet, but I had a hard time differentiating between the two when it seemed a cheap feel was all either wanted. Unfortunately, I couldn't discuss Jude with anyone, and Chet was just an ass. I could talk until I was blue in the face about the lacrosse player the girls on campus lusted after, and it wouldn't change anything about him. Sitting cross-legged on my bed, I held the phone in my hand and wondered when the shift had taken place with Jude. I'd always believed he cared about me, and I still wanted to. I just couldn't reconcile his ability to change gears and hand me off to another guy with so little fight-not that I'd given him an opening to do anything different. I flung myself back onto my pillows and let out a loud grunt. The door swung open during my anxious release, but I didn't bother to gl
Family Ties Chapter 21: Portia
"Hey," I greeted Bart.He popped a quick kiss on my lips that felt warm and good. Although I had to admit, it wasn't electric-but maybe rocking chairs and growing old wasn't about explosive moments, and instead, relied on deep-seated friendship and mutual attraction."Hey, yourself. You want to grab some dinner? I'm going to meet Jet and Todd in the cafeteria." He leaned against the doorframe.My shoulders relaxed, and I fell under the charm that captivated me anytime we were together. When I was physically in his presence, I was content, happy. Unfortunately, when he wasn't within reach, my mind wandered endlessly. For the time being, I decided to focus on the here and now. At eighteen, I didn't have to make any life-altering decisions-he asked about dinner, not marriage. "Actually, I'm starving." I grabbed my keys and then tugged a sweatshirt over my head. "I wanted to talk to you about something, anyhow." I moved past him and locked my room behind me. Bart took my hand a
Family Ties Chapter 22: Jude
The festivities were set to begin promptly at seven. Hensley was giddy over Portia bringing home a boy, Ernie appeared defensive, and I just had to sit back to watch how it played out. Neither Hensley nor Ernie mentioned a surprise of any kind; however, Hensley had made a roast, which was my favorite. It also happened to be the best thing she cooked, so I couldn't be certain it was for me and not Portia's "guest.""Do you know anything about this boy, Jude?" My foster mother had to be one of the kindest, most sincere, gentle women I'd ever known-the thought of a twenty-year-old guy being a "boy" might have made her a tad naïve, as well."I met him the day I dropped Portia off." Indifference dripped from my words and expression."And what's he like?" Her eyes were wide with anticipation. She mixed the ingredients for cookies together with her electric mixer, waiting for me to divulge the inside scoop.I hadn't committed him to memory. "Nice, I guess." I'd tried to forget him. If
Family Ties Chapter 23: Jude
When I got back to the house, Bart's car was gone, and I assumed Portia had left with him. It was late, although I didn't know what time since I hadn't grabbed my cell phone when I'd stormed out after dinner. The house was dark, and a heavy silence hung in the air. Every step I took equated to walking in water, and the tension I'd left in the house still gripped every surface and available space. The stairs might as well have been Everest, as hard as they were to climb. A chill ran down my spine that prickled my skin, taking a substantial burden with it and making every step laborious. I didn't find the atmosphere to be any different on the second floor than the first, except there was even less light to illuminate the hall without windows. It wasn't difficult to navigate the familiar path, just uncomfortable. I hadn't felt like a stranger in this house since the first day I'd arrived-now it was as though I was an intruder.After entering the second room on the left, I closed the
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