AUGUST
“That guy?!” I huffed in disappointment. I’m sure that Ambrose guy is not the only good-looking guy around here, but I’d be damned if I don’t let the gayness deep inside of me scream in total madness.
I have been around the city of Highmont throughout my sixteen years of existence, and while good-looking boys are everywhere to be found, I haven’t really met someone that’s as striking as this Ambrose guy.
“Mhmm. He’s nothing but trouble.” Mary nodded and continued talking bad things about Ambrose as she was leading the way to who knows where but I just wasn’t listening to her. My head is somewhere else, and I thought I could steal one last glance at that beautiful creature.
I paused for a while and looked back. Ambrose just had a chest bump with another guy, and I got the chance to look at him. I don’t know if he saw me staring at him, but he looked back at me and smiled.
Jesus F. Christ!
I felt my cheeks blush for a moment, and I immediately looked away before I could even lose my shit. That Ambrose guy just smiled at me. Holy mother of Christ! If I was an ice cube, I would’ve melted right away.
“No one wants to mess with him.” Mary spat as a conclusion of her thoughts about Ambrose.
“You talk like he’s a terrible person.” I spat, pretending that I’d heard everything negative that she said.
“He is. If he’s not visiting the guidance counselor’s office, he’s visiting the school clinic.” Mary said and paused. “Also,” She turned around and pointed her finger at me. “Terrible is an understatement. I’d say he’s the worst!”
“Well, then I don’t want to mess with him either.” I babbled. “Uhm, where are we heading, by the way?” I asked, wondering where the hell is she taking me to. I still haven’t opened my locker, but I guess I could do that later.
Mary continued walking, and I didn’t even know why I was following her when I literally just met her. I’m sure I can take care of myself, but I guess I won’t lose anything if I hang out with her today. She’s a walking teapot, and this is going to be very beneficial to me. I don’t even have to ask anything, but she will spill all the tea.
We were now outside the main building walking towards the school park. Some are hanging out with their respective circles, and some are just couples publicly displaying their affection. There are few tables made out of stone spread throughout the lush scenery of the park serving as a hangout lounge.
“This will be your welcoming committee,” Mary uttered as she led me to one of the tables occupied by two guys who looked bored.
“Welcoming committee?”
“August, these are my friends!” Mary chirped enthusiastically. “This is Rock,” She pointed at the guy wearing a red bonnet.
“Oh great, Mary! You brought another loser to this club.” Rock blurted.
When I heard the word loser, my head cursed in four different languages. This isn’t what I’m expecting to be my welcoming committee. I was already thinking of ditching them right at this moment, but I’m not that much of a terrible person. Even though I haven’t been in a losers’ club before, I have been a loser myself.
“Shut up, Rock!” Mary scowled at him.
“And this is Gustav,” Pointing at the other guy, Mary switched faces from gritting her teeth to smiling.
“Hi guys, I’m August,” I said, introducing myself with a little bit of a forced smile.
I’m sure these guys already know my name from that early fiasco that I got myself into. That’s probably the main reason why Rock thinks that Mary brought another loser to join their club.
“Welcome to the losers’ club.” Gustav spat and voluntarily shook my hand.
“Welcome, loser!” Rock followed up and did the same thing Gustav did. They both seemed like they were congratulating me for being here.
“You guys, stop it! We’ve already talked about this.” Mary said as she settled down, facing both guys.
“Talked about what?” I asked as I sat down right beside Mary.
“About putting an end to the so-called ‘losers’ club,’” Mary replied, deliberately accentuating the losers’ club.
“Yeah, we did, but we don’t know how.” Rock started. “Look around, Mary Jane Espinosa. Everyone’s looking way better than they were last school semester, and we are still … us.”
My eyes roamed around, and everyone looked pretty normal for a teenager to me. I don’t understand why I’m starting to get the feeling that these guys are so insecure about themselves. I looked at Rock, and he’s fine; his best asset is probably his long natural lashes that every girl wants to have. He’s wearing braces, but it looks like he’s about to wear retainers in the next two or three months.
“Ew Rock, stop calling me by my full name.” Mary spat in absolute disgust.
My observant attention went to Mary. Putting on this dark eyeliner thing and matching it with a burgundy lipstick is probably her signature look. Her hair is a bit curly that she almost looks like she just woke up and didn’t even bother to comb her hair.
“Rock’s right.” Gustav babbled in agreement with Rock’s statement.
Gustav’s a bit chubbier, and if I’m going to judge him with malice, I’d say he’s always that one kid who gets picked last.
“So what if everyone’s looking better?!!!” Mary spat, trying to cheer up Rock and Gustav. “This isn’t about them. This is about us!”
I sat in absolute silence. There are a lot of things that I want to say, but I only know these guys for about fifteen minutes. I figured it’s not the right time and place to be meddling with their social problems.
“Phil has wheels now.” Gustav spat.
“Of course he has wheels now; wait, what? Phil’s got a car now?” Mary asked, seemingly surprised.
“Yup. He didn’t bring it to school today, but I saw him driving around town last week.” Gustav said.
“That effin’ bastard!” Mary spat. “Now he got something to brag about, and everyone will bow down to him.”
“Who’s Phil?” I asked.
“You see that guy with a faded buzz cut?” Gustav uttered, pointing at the farthest table where there’s a group of three guys wearing the same varsity jacket that Ambrose was wearing. “That’s Phil Willard. He’s one of the richer kids.”
“Look at Victoria; she’s blonde now.” Rock trailed, pointing at this girl walking towards Phil’s group. “And her hair is even straighter than before.”
“Ugh, you’re talking about Victoria again.” Mary spat, rolling her eyes. “Victoria will never go out with a guy like you.”
“I know, but what if she wakes up one day and decides to go out with me.” Rock spat, and he’s almost in a daydream.
Rock and Mary bickered for a while. My eyes roamed around again, and I noticed that everyone had their very own clique. This is pretty normal, but I think I got myself in the wrong clique. It’s not that I don’t want to be friends with these guys, but I don’t think that the rest of my high school life will be memorable with them.
I’ve experienced being one of the popular kids last semester, and although I didn’t have the chance to bask in its glory for a bit longer, it sure felt good. I don’t want my junior year to be forgettable.
After the thirty-minute break, we all went to our classes, and from that point, nothing much exciting happened. I didn’t have much of a problem introducing myself to each class that I entered, and I never felt so normal. Apparently, everyone remembered my name and my face, and no one’s giving a single crap about that orientation fiasco. Although I love the fact that no one’s coming for me with their sharp claws yet but, somehow, this feels utterly alarming.
I was hoping that I could ditch Mary and her gang during a lunch break, but she was quick to sneak up on me. I wanted to frankly decline her indirect invitation, but my actions acted otherwise. I sat with them at the loneliest table, and if I’m honest, I’d say this is the worst table. Every single clique seemed to be really having fun while eating their lunch, and I’m here with these self-proclaimed losers. I look at all of them, and they are not totally losers, but it’s actually their negative thoughts that make them one. I’m hearing Rock and Mary bickering about their social insecurities and how much they want to become this person and whatnot. And then there’s Gustav with his self-deprecating one-liners that’s just making me want to switch tables.
The day eventually reeled to an end earlier than I was expecting. Our teacher for our last period didn’t show up, and we were allowed to leave the room. I was inching my way towards my locker when I noticed Phil Willard with a few boys wearing the same varsity jackets lined up along the hallway. They were all holding a single rose and were probably waiting to give it to someone.
“What the heck is going on?!” Someone suddenly talked right behind me, and I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
“Holy mo…” I was about to curse.
“Sorry. I thought you saw me following right behind you.” It was Mary being good at popping out of nowhere.
“You scared the hell out of me.” I spat right at her face.
All six of the boys gathered and walked as if they were in a boy band music video.
“Move aside, losers,” Phil shouted, prompting us to quickly move away for them to pass. We watched them walk towards this pretty girl.
“Ugh, Rachel? This is for her again?” Mary uttered in apparent distaste. I reckon Mary’s talking about the pretty girl.
The boys gave Rachel the roses, and suddenly someone started strumming a guitar, and out of nowhere, I saw Ambrose Haylock.
AUGUST Ambrose strummed the guitar with such ease. Or at least that’s how I heard it. I’m not a big fan of musical instruments, but it sounded pretty clean. After handing the roses, Phil and the boys all cleared the view, so this Rachel girl could see Ambrose. This is probably the first time I see this gorgeous creature up close, and the inner gayness hiding inside me shrilled in utter admiration. He’s blessed with a chiseled cheek, and his skin appears to be naturally kissed by the sun. There’s a slit in his left eyebrow, and I don’t know if it’s natural or he had it done, but there’s no denying the fact that it made him look sexier. From my youngest years Till this moment here I've never seen Such a lovely queen From the skies above  
AUGUST The headmistress slammed the pen on the table before eventually standing up and giving me a half-smile. She entered the door on the left, which I'm guessing to be some sort of a storage room. I immediately caught the feeling that I was going to wait here for another two minutes, so I let my eyes roam around the office. It's a generic office, and there's nothing much to look at except for the fish tank that housed a single fat goldfish. There are a few seemingly rare and colorful succulents displayed on the headmistress's desk. Perhaps she's one of those older people who love the company of a succulent plant. My eyes moved to her nameplate that said Penelope Briar, and I tried memorizing it just so I knew how will I call her later. Two minutes passed, and she hadn't returned yet. I was already beginning to feel bored. My feet are itching to go home. I carried myself towards the fish tank and thought of observing th
AUGUST My chest was still pumping, thankfully, it's not out of fear anymore, but it's literally out of exhaustion. I might have pedaled my way home in ten minutes, and it got my heart racing with the wind. I dragged the bicycle inside the garage and sat on the ground for a while until the pumping in my chest calmed down to a tolerable state. My backpack felt a bit heavier now than I've stepped down from the bicycle. After fifteen minutes of letting the heat on my nerves settle down, I stood up and staggered inside the house."I'm home!" I shouted as my usual routine, but I immediately remembered I was not in Highmont anymore, and this isn't my old place, and this is not even my old family. No one answered. My dad's probably still at the repair shop, and Wednesday's probably taking a nap or something.I went straight to the fridge and poured a glass of ice-cold water. I gulped the water as if I hadn't had a glass of it for years, an
AUGUST Rachel casually tucked her hair behind her ear before taking her time to sit right in front of me. I'm no blind person; I know when someone's trying to act cute, and Rachel's totally doing that. She lets out a tiny smile, and now that I have a closer view of her face, I must say she's a true natural. I think I'm starting to develop a girl crush on her."Did you know that you are the first person who stood up against Ambrose?" She said as a little trivia of my work."I don't, but now I do," I replied."Hahaha." She lets out a short chuckle. "And you are funny.""Ha, I don't know about that."Rachel's totally trying to flirt with me, and once again, the gayness hiding inside of me is already commencing in panic mode. There are a few girls who tried their luck to flirt with me back when I was still at Highmont high, and I just didn't like any of them. And now here's another hopeful girl, and her actions brought back those cringing me
AUGUSTSomeone should just run me over with a truck or shoot me in the head with a pistol or even make me disappear in thin air. I didn’t wish for anything of this, but I knew and I expected this to happen. I just didn’t want it to happen now with a lot of eyes gazing over us. I know Jessie was the one who took that clip, and I’m not sure if posting it was his way of thanking my courageous actions or he was just trying to humiliate Ambrose. Either way, the clip clearly made Ambrose look impotent. I’m not trying to be the big person in the picture, but I also thought it made me look like his kryptonite.Ambrose is definitely pissed at me.Does this confrontation have to happen now? As in right now? Right in front of everybody.There are a lot of people watching, and this isn’t going to end up very well for me. I look behind and everyone’s looking at us
AUGUST“August!” Rachel suddenly showed up at the door. She appeared to be concerned about my current state. I can’t think of any possible reason as to why she’s acting this way. Although it’s nice to have some stranger show a bit of unwarranted concern to me, still it’s bizarre for that person to be Rachel Curtis out of all people. Everyone adores this girl. She’s every guy’s dream to date and every girl wants to be.“Hey,” I smiled at her as she inched her way closer to me.“Thank goodness you’re okay!” She let out and hugged me tight as if we’ve known each other for so long. It isn’t the case but it puzzles me to think that she’s into me or something. She smelled like vanilla and daffodil though.“Woah, Woah!” I spat as a surprising reaction. Mary and I exchanged some looks.I’m to going to g
AMBROSE HAYLOCKA three-day suspension. A fu**cking three-day suspension on the first week of the school semester. That’s the only consequence that I’ve earned from beating the shit out of that newcomer. If I only knew I would just be suspended, then I would have bashed his head like a watermelon just like that guitar that I used yesterday. He made me look like shit even though he ain’t the real shit. I know he wasn’t the one who uploaded that clip on Mary Heights Files but he was the reason why I entered school this morning and some people are laughing at me. Phil even said he might just steal my high spot for being the most feared person in all of Mary Heights High. I don’t give a single fuck about being the most feared person here but I just want to keep that spot if I want to survive this hell. Being feared provides me with a lot of benefits that I needed. Money. Food. Protection. And the fact that no one wants to
AMBROSEI’m pretty much aware of the blatant disrespect that I’ve done to my brother’s grave but wherever he is right now, I don’t think he’s aware of the hell that he has been bringing to my life. I never truly met him in the flesh. All I know is he died when I was still a baby, at least that’s what my mother had told me. I blessed his grave with one last spit before eventually trudging away.I fished the house key from my pocket and entered at the backdoor instead of wasting what’s left of my energy by walking around the house. I turned the lights on and the hollowness of the house welcomed me with open arms. I immediately walked towards the fridge still hoping to see anything to snack on but there’s basically nothing left. There are five eggs, a few stalks of celery, three carrots, fruit juices and the rest are just sauces and condiments. I just poured myself a glass of cold water before dec