What?! I erased Chen Lan's memories?
No wonder he didn't recognize me…
……
My mind went blank. I had no idea about what I should think about next.
Seems like I really loved him in the past….there's no other way, I would torture myself to stop someone from getting hurt.
There must be some huge reason for me to do that. But why in the first place did I even fall for him?
Didn't I actually vow to myself that I shouldn't recklessly fall in love with anyone, but be a good girl and return to my country to get married to someone from my own culture?!
Why the hell would I even have such deep feelings for that Chen Lan?
I've never broken my own rules in the past!.
So frustrating!!!!!
I shook my head hoping that I could clear those thoughts out of my mind.
“Laia, are you okay?”
I shot open my eyes and saw Dr Wei standing beside my bed. Oops, I was hallucinating and then went into my own world of thoughts.
“Sorry, I'm fine. I was just thinking.”
“With your eyes closed? That's okay, but I'm sure you remembered something just now.”
Technically speaking…that piece of memory contains sensitive information which cannot be revealed to third parties.
But Chen Lan is the only clue for me to bring my memories back, and I should trust my doctor, and he's my senior in college too. I hope it isn't too awkward.
“I think I found a very important part of my memory.”
“Would you mind sharing that with me? It's my duty to keep things confidential.”
I nodded.
“I hypnotized Chen Lan into forgetting me…. And I think he was too important for me at that time. It seemed like I didn't want him to get hurt due to our memories. I wanted him to forget me without a trace.”
My voice broke as I finished the sentence, and I felt a huge teardrop roll down my cheek. I didn't feel like wiping it away and sat still in an inexplicable shock.
Dr Wei was silent for a while.
“Things seem to be getting more complicated than we imagined. Looks like you're a huge trouble-maker despite your innocent looks.” Saying that he let out a nervous chuckle.
That was too lame for a joke, but still what he said was true…. No one else except me can clear this mess I've created. I suddenly made up my mind.
“Dr Wei, I've decided. I'd like to interact more with Chen Lan. My condition looks stable and is getting better. I don't think it would be problematic for me to recall my memories with the help of my interaction with Chen Lan. I'm sure it will help me a lot. Once I have sufficient leads, we can proceed with the hypnotherapy to fill out all the gaps, as long as it is possible. It will be, for sure. What do you think about it, Dr Wei?”
He was looking at me intently with a surprising look in his eyes. He sighed,
“Finally, you sound like your former self.”
I directed a questioning gaze towards him.
“I don't think you remember, but you were a very sharp practitioner in counselling psychology. We once met in an online meeting while you were working as an assistant psychologist intern. During that time, though you were still an intern, you sounded extremely professional and was very sharp. Just now you sounded like that..”
I must have been really good to leave an impression on Dr Wei.
“Okay, since you are confident, and since your condition is also better, I agree with the therapy plan. Because it sounds feasible enough.”
“Great then.” Strangely, I felt myself overflowing with anticipation.
“Do you have Chen Lan's phone number?”
“No. Why would I have his number?”
What? Then how am I supposed to contact him?
Currently, I have no means to contact him. I must find a way.
Ugh! I wanted to take a stroll this morning, but I ended up back here. Maybe I can think while I walk around.
“Dr Wei, I'd like to finish my walk. I might come up with something during that time.”
“That's a great idea, you can go out after finishing up your lunch. It must have gone cold”
I eyed the table. My lunch was there. At the perfect timing, Dr Wei's phone rang.
“Okay, I'll be there right now”…he collected a file that was placed on the table.
“I'm leaving Laia, eat it up and take a stroll, be safe okay?”
I nodded while I reached up for the food platter. He left soon.
I finished eating in no time. Again at the perfect timing, a nurse came in with a large trolley to collect the food platter.
I quickly ran to the sink, to clean myself up. I patted my hair neatly (That was all I could do) and dashed out of the room.
I entered the corridor, started walking and then turned around the corner. Maybe I was too anticipated and failed to notice what was coming ahead. A nurse suddenly ran into me. I wasn't in a good state and my slippers failed to keep up my balance. I was falling backwards. I flung my hands all around but couldn't grasp hold of anything. The nurse fell. I saw 2 other nurses running towards us, but it is definitely gonna be too late to stop me from falling.
Just now I have begun to recall my memories. Oh god! Don't tell me that I'm gonna have a fall and hit my head again?!
All of a sudden, I felt a firm grip on my wrist. In a flash of a second, I was quickly whirled around. The turn was swift enough to make me dizzy. With another great pull, accompanied by my dizziness I settled on something hard which was poised upright.
Maybe a wall. I fumbled up my hands while I felt the rustle of fabric on my palms. I was trying to raise my head but was too dizzy for that so I could only turn to look up.
I saw a blurry outline of a chin. Chin? I was leaning on someone!
I pulled myself off from where I was leaning and again was lost my balance, while a strong pair of arms wrapped around me to steady me up on my feet.
It must have been very romantic if it had happened in some other location, especially where I was wearing something else than hospital pyjamas.
I looked up to glance at my saviour.
Chen Lan…
Others might've thought it was weird, but mysteriously I didn’t have any strength to break away from his arms.
His gaze pierced through my eyes. I felt everything around us melting away. I could see nothing else apart from him and felt me losing myself in his mesmerizing dark eyes.
Abruptly, he twirled me around with him and smiled. I felt myself moving and could hear the grand tune of a fine orchestra. Waltz?
We were dancing. He was looking even more manly and cool in the exquisite black tuxedo he was wearing. I could feel the smouldering jealous glances of the crowd around us.
I felt his arm which was encircling my waist, pull me more closer to him.
“Focus your attention on me. Don't waste it on others.”
“I think I should. After all, you are my saviour”
“So damsel-in-distress, now do you consider me as your hero?
Come on… what did I say?
“Yes”
Chen Lan's eyes widened in surprise. “Yes?”
“If you want me to repeat it…… Yes”
Did I accept him just like that?
This guy! How did he pry open my heart? I locked it up with all sorts of difficult combination locks!
In a split second, the view of the hospital corridor replaced the posh interior of the hall, and I could see the gossipy onlookers whisper among themselves while Chen Lan still held me firmly. Or it could look more like I was still grabbing onto him. I pushed myself away from him carefully, reminding myself not to lose my balance again. I simply stared at the ground. I knew I must be looking so dumb, but there was no other way I could avoid the eyes of the passers-by and especially Chen Lan. Soon the onlookers moved away. I slowly glanced up at Chen Lan, not sure about what reaction I should give. However, I noticed that he was oddly too calm and appeared so relaxed as if such weird incidents were a daily occurrence to him. And I also noticed that he was openly staring at me. I averted my gaze uneasily and after a few moments, I again sneaked a glance at him to find that he was still staring at me. I decided to break the silence before I get crazy. “T
There must be something wrong with this guy. Furthermore, it was too unrealistic to receive a confession while I'm in this state. I was lost in his eyes again. There was a sudden blur in my vision which returned to normal immediately. The background was different. Whoa! I can't believe this! A rich dark green mountain background. Sturdy metal cables stretched upwards on either side. Facing me was Chen Lan. My hands tightly clasped within his, I was intently gazing at him. Why would I do something cheesily romantic like that? I was walking forward, while Chen Lan was stepping backwards at the same pace as mine without breaking eye contact. I suddenly averted my eyes and looked down. GOOD HEAVENS! How many feet is this?! Looks like 1000ft! Where the hell?! I could feel that extreme fear.
"LAI-A-WAKE-UP!-LAI-A-WAKE-UP!-LAI-A-WAKE-UP!...." "Ugh! leave me alone!" "LAI-A-WAKE-UP!-LAI-A-WAKE-UP!-LAI-A-WAKE-UP!...." These crazy girls! I feel like screaming! "STOP IT!" yelling out like that, I shot up from my bunk-bed and glared at the faces which were staring up at me. I felt so glad that I got the top bunk, not the bottom one. Or else, they'd have made me deaf with their chants. "Laia! don't you remember what day it is?", the short one asked. Before I could even think, "It's freshmen admission!!! There'll be a lot of cute and hot juniors", the tall one answered. "Yaay!", both cheered in unison. There they go again! I quickly climbed down and ran into the bathroom ignoring those two. Today, I had to go to college earlier than usual, so I soon hurried back into the room after cleaning myself up. Both of them were already dressed up. One was packing
Completely startled, I kept leaning back to prevent the tiny gap left between us from getting even smaller. Strangely, I didn't push him away, or hit him or do any sort of action in protest of his provoking behaviour. “You will fall backwards if you keep leaning back like that.” That sentence knocked some sense into me. I pushed him away and frowned at him. My brain began betraying me at that very moment by refusing to generate speech. However, I mustered up some courage and retorted at him, “Such an arrogant kid!” “My apologies, Senior. I startled you.” He was still smiling mischievously, his eyes twinkling with delight like a kid who had been rewarded with ice cream. Looking at his ridiculous expression, I wanted to shout more, but I was already running late, so I turned around for real this time and rushed back along the same corridor which we passed a few minutes ago. Behind me, I heard him shout out, “But it wasn't
WeiWei and Rourou looked at me with worried looks. "Both of you know me the best. With my conservative character, do you think that I'd be able to fall in love with someone but get married to another?" Both of them shook their heads either way in unison. "So, There's no such thing like love, or dating for me." Rourou hugged me from the side, hoping it would comfort me, while WeiWei clasped my hand within hers. We shared a few moments of silence. Both of them were feeling down. I didn't want to make them sadder, so I immediately cheered up. "Hey, both of you, are you mourning for someone? So melancholic. Back to your positions! No more sad faces!" Hearing that, both of them seemed to cheer up a bit and returned to their tables and continued with their study. Relieved, I let out a deep sigh. Born in a prestigious Indian family of high social status, it was my duty to continue the bloodline of my family, since I was the only child
“How can you casually say that?” “Because I know how you feel.” It might have sounded romantic, in a romantic atmosphere like this, with a romantic guy standing beside me, holding an umbrella for me, and walking me back to my dorm. But right now, I was feeling very much pissed off. “Huh. Do you know how I feel? Do you?” “Take a good rest, I don't think you can manage this conversation.” “Can you please stop it? Stop acting as if you know me! It's really irritating!” Only the pattering of the raindrops on the floor was audible and nothing else. “I hate it when people act up as if they understand me. Don't you even dare to try that!” Saying that I left without another word. I don't know why I was so angry, but it was painful, so painful to hear his words. Especially when he said that he knew how I felt. I felt my legs automatically leading their way up to my dorm. I flung the door open. RouRou and WeiWei gave me startled
I tried my best not to yell at him and took some deep breaths to ease out the fury building up within me. “Chen Lan, let's talk.” “Isn't that what we're doing right now?” Is he stupid? Now that I try to be calm, he is purposefully trying to get on my nerves again by making those sarcastic remarks. “Come let's go and sit somewhere.” Saying that I found a stone table with a few stone stools located under a tree. It was the nearest option. I went there and sat, so did he. “So finally, you call me by my name.” Ah! Shit! I must have called him 'kid' or 'little junior'. “When you call a senior by name, why can't I call a junior by his name?” “Sounds logical. But for me, it really seemed like you did that subconsciously.” I must make sure and check that this guys majors in Data Science, not Applied Psychology. “I'm not here to chat leisurely with you, let me come straight to the… “ Befo
.... After a few moments of thought, I was literally sober enough and made my decision. Why should I do what he says? Would he even know if I think good about him or not? Silly guy. I'm gonna continue to treat you like trash within my mind. What can you do? I shot up from my seat. Both of those silly roommates of mine were silently munching up their food without even looking up. I left without a word. Would it help if I blame everything on them or yell at them? No. When I was almost at the exit, a student who was sitting there suddenly ran up to me and gave me a folded piece of paper. "A handsome guy wearing blue told me to give this to you." Handsome guy... To hell with his looks! I thanked the student and unfolded the paper as I left the cafeteria. "With your personality, if my guess was correct, you would trash this challenge straight away even befor