Alexander is dealing with a lot of emotions. Thankfully he has a friend like André who is patient enough to let him work through them. But is Delilah?
A part of me felt like I deserved this. I deserved Alexander to treat me as just another patient. I am the one that went no contact. I’m the one that ended our friendship. So why should I expect his feelings to change suddenly? The mate bond can do much but can’t erase the past. He was hurt by my pulling away from our friendship. He wouldn’t be acting like this if he wasn’t unless he’s like this because I’m a surrogate for André and Darren. And if that’s the case, well, too bad. André is his cousin, maybe not by blood, but still. They are family, and more than that, André is his Alpha. He should be supportive of anyone offering to carry the heirs for Madonie. Then a part of me says Alexander can go to hell. I don’t deserve to be treated so coldly. He knew why I stopped talking to him. I couldn’t stand around while Liar played him like a fiddle. I couldn’t stand by and watch the train wreck. Plus, she was pretty clear that night I needed to stay away and went so far as to point out th
The run from André’s villa to the pack hospital didn’t help clear my mind. It felt good to be home, however. Spending nine months away had been hard. There’s a reason that rogues tend to be more aggressive and unstable. They have no connection to a pack and a territory. They can’t ever feel ‘home.’ It’s similar, but to a lesser extent, when a wolf spends extended periods away from their pack and territory. It explained why the three of us had grown increasingly agitated the longer we were gone. I’m amazed Papa hadn’t cracked being so far from Incubi and Mama. Then again, maybe that’s why he’d been the more level-headed of us. He may have been far from her, but the bond remained. Meanwhile, Zoe and I didn’t have that. I feel bad for the packs they still had to visit, mostly Ironfur, as it was next after Silvermane left a bad impression on all of us. I can only hope the males of Ironfur aren’t sexist Neanderthals that try to talk down to her. If they are well, I hope Alpha Finn is cool
I wasn’t sure how I would get through this with Alexander acting this way. How am I supposed to handle him touching me, but only in a professional manner? How is he able to separate the feelings of the bond like that? I’m struggling to separate the effects of the bond from my feelings. I admit there is still part of me that cares very much for him, not a result of the bond. There is still hurt in my heart from how he’s been acting. ‘You love him, and you know it.’ Helia commented. ‘That’s why this is so hard for you. And we don’t know why Alexander is acting like this. We can find out more when we talk to him alone.’ She assured me. I’m not sure how much of a silver lining that is. Goddess knows when or if I’ll get to speak with him alone. After I’ve been medically clear, there isn’t any guarantee he won’t try to run off and avoid me. I’ll have to show him I’m not the same old Delilah that will let him sit me on the sidelines of his life. I’m a strong independent woman who can and w
Lucius had crossed a line. He had no right to use the word ‘love’ like that. Least of all, using it when trying to speak for me. I don’t even know how I feel about Delilah. Yes, of course, I care about her. I cared about her even before all this. I’ve cared about her since the war. But that doesn’t mean I love her. And I am not going to let the mate bond dictate my feelings. If I learned anything from my parents, it’s that love should be earned. Love should be cultivated. Love isn’t a light switch that you flick and suddenly feel. Love is a seed in your heart that needs to be nurtured to grow and, if possible, blossom. I don’t want a love that is only there because of a mythical bond. I want a love that I feel on my own. I may have sunk into the darkness of my panic attack to the point that Lucius was able to take control, but I heard him say we love her. And that was enough to get me to fight the rip tide that was trying to pull me under. It took me longer than I wanted to break fr
Today has been my life’s most stressful and emotional, well maybe top three. I don’t think being in this situation with Alexander could top witnessing my parents’ murder. Nothing could ever be more stressful and emotional than that day. And I don’t think hashing out our issues like this would truly unseat being drugged and kidnapped by Doctor Silvano. ‘Though that day ended well enough. The war ended, Alexander saved you, and you got to cuddle with him in your hospital bed. Maybe if we play our cards right, we can get him to cuddle again.’ Helia commented. ‘That sounds unlikely. Remember how he looked like he was going to kiss me? Then he felt my baby bump and immediately disengaged. He doesn’t like that I’m pregnant and probably won’t touch me while I am, if ever.’ I frowned as that thought hit me. I don’t know the details or full extent of what the aftermath of Liar and her failed baby trap did to Alexander. Being pregnant triggers him. But I can’t help that. I can’t just stop bei
Call me a coward if you want, but I know myself well enough to know I needed to get out of that room before I said something upsetting her. I needed to go before I had another episode. I left because it was what would be best for my mental health and her general health. You could argue that my departure and distance put a strain on her. Do you know what I have to say to that? No shit Sherlock. It doesn’t take a medical degree to know that. However, I must also consider my health and how having another episode would affect her. So, you can sit there and judge me all you want, but this isn’t your life. It’s mine, and I’ll make the judgment calls on what is best for me, even if that makes me fundamentally selfish. I did what I thought was best. I called Annamaria to attend to Delilah’s medical needs. I’d done my task of repairing the placental abruptions. Her actual attending obstetrician could do everything else. That is not my area of expertise. It is not what I specialized in at un
I don’t know which sound was louder, my pounding heart or the soft squeak of the bedroom door as it opened. I was ready to fight whoever it was. André and Darren would have announced themselves aloud or in the family link. Lando would have also announced himself. And no one else would waltz up to the Alpha villa and into the guest house. I could only assume it was someone who wanted to hurt me or, more so, the heirs. No one is hurting these babies. I don’t care if some members of Madonie still haven’t accepted André and Darren’s reign. Their closed minds caused them to go this path to have an heir instead of naming Lando as the heir. Or if it’s not someone from Madonie, it could be a rogue. Not very likely, but there is still the possibility that one got past the borders. I tried remaining as still as possible while concentrating on using Helia’s power. A vine had grown from my hand, down over the edge of the bed and across the floor, and when whoever was breaking into my room steppe
“Delilah? Hello? Don’t tell me that pregnancy brain hit you again.” Persephone sighed as she shifted Jacira in her arms. “Huh? I’m sorry, Persey.” I apologized with a frown as Jacira started to fuss. “I’m so sorry, Jacira.” I apologized sweetly to my two-week-old niece. “It’s okay, Delilah. I’m just worried about you. You called me and then went silent with a far-off look. I would say I wasn’t used to that, but you’ve met my mate. He can easily get distracted. It’s just that you don’t usually do that.” Persephone sighed. “And don’t worry, Jacira is okay. I just think… yep…” She wrinkled her nose holding Jacira up. “Jonathan. It’s your turn, and your daughter left you a ripe one.” Persephone grinned. “I’m a little busy.” I heard Jonathan in the distance. “And I’m talking to Delilah. So, stop adding nitric acid to that before….” She winced, and I heard a muffled explosion in the background. After living with them while I was abroad, I can attest that it’s not uncommon for there t