F A R A H
I was busy with my thought when I heard the ping on my phone. Which is a message from Jawad.Mom is picking you up tomorrow to shop for the wedding dress. The way he wrote the wedding dress with exclamation mark made me think otherwise.I replied with an 'Okay' keeping my phone on the nightstand making sure it's in silent mode and lay on my bed, before I know it, I fell into a deep slumber. •••I was working on some files that needed to be printed out when I heard the landline phone ringing.“Hello” I answered politely.“Where are the files I asked you to bring” Jawad spoke in a low tone, the way he speaks tells me he's not in a good mood.“I'm sorry sir, I will bring it right aw...” he didn't even let me finish and he hung up what's this supposed to mean. We are not even married but he's showing his true self. Ya Allah help me! I prayed.I gathered the files from my desk drawer and quickly made my way to his office. knocking on it, I heard him say 'come in'. Before entering I mouthed hasbunallahu wa ni'imal wakil and breath in and out to keep me calm. I opened the door and entered.“Here are the files sir,” I said in a low voice, keeping the files on his desk after I notice he didn't even glance at me. I was about to leave when he finally opened his mouth.“Mom is coming by 2 O'Clock, you can leave early” he lifted his face and our eyes met. I quickly avert my gaze.“Okay,” I answered. I left his office hurriedly closing the door behind me.I don't know why Aunt Khadija did not call me herself.I checked my phone and it is 1:00 o'clock I have one hour to get back home and get ready; I don't want to keep Aunt Khadija waiting. As I reached home, I greeted my mom by kissing her in the cheeks.“Farah what time is Aunt Khadija picking you up,” she asked. so she also knew.“She's coming by 2:00 o'clock” I shouted, I was already halfway to my room.I took a warm shower, it has become my habit whenever I came back from work the first thing I do is to take a shower. I perform my wudhu and prayed Zuhr.wearing a polka dot blouse, I tied my hair in a bun and place on my black scarf. Taking my phone and purse, I rushed down. I checked the time 5 mins to 2 o'clock she will be here anytime now. I didn't finish closing my thoughts when the doorbell rang.“It must be Khadija,” Mom said while peeling Apples.“Yes, I will get the door” I walked toward the door; opening it revealing Aunt Khadija, wearing a lovely dress and with a floral scarf wrapped on her hair.“Assalamu Alaikum Aunt Khadija”“Wa alaiki Salam Farah” she embraces me in a hug, aunt Khadija is a kind-hearted woman. The moment they saw each other with mom, their face lit up with happiness. They embraced each other in a hug. After chatting for a while about the wedding preparation we decided to leave.“Okay Farah, let's get going the driver is waiting outside,” she said.“Take care, I know if Yasmin comes back she will throw a tantrum that you didn't take her with you” Mom interjected. We both laugh.Our car came to a halt in front of a big shop. Upon entering the shop, my mouth hung open seeing how the shop is filled with beautiful wedding dresses. A lady approached us.“Assalamu Alaikum Mrs. Abdallah,” the lady said. she knows Aunt, which means Aunt is a Customer here.“Wa Alaikum Salam Fadila, we are here for the dresses”“Okay Ma'am Follow me” the lady called Fadila said. She leads us to a room where VIP was written boldly on the top.Fadila brought many dresses which I can't even count t“Farah try these ones let's see which one will fit,” Aunt Khadija said.I tried almost all the clothes, With Aunt not liking them. After much digging, we finally choose some.“Let's choose this for the Walima” Aunt declared, eyeing the ash Abaya with emerald stones design at the front while the back has a small bow tie around the waist area.“Masha Allah this will fit perfectly” Fadila chirped in.“We will take those Fadila” aunt announced pointing at a pile of dresses of different designs laid on the Sofa.After going around shopping at numerous shops we decided to feed our stomach, stopping at a restaurant. Aunt said we should order take out, the moment we went back to the car I started digging in, I completely forgot about mother-in-law that is sitting beside me because I was very hungry food is life. You can't do without food.Around 6:00 we finally drove back to my house the driver helped me with the bags, I bid aunt Khadija goodbye.“Goodnight Farah extends my greeting to your Mom, I can't go in as it's getting late already”“Insha Allah”I entered the house spotting my mom sitting in the living room holding a cup h while Yasmin is sitting beside her.“Mom I'm back” I announced“Welcome back, Yasmin go and help your sister with the bags” the way Yasmin was frowning her face tells me she's angry we didn't take her along.“I can't wait for the day sis Farah, In less than five days you will be married” it’s very easy to calm Yasmin I changed her mood from frowning to smiling I will surely miss my little sister. Just the thought of living my house made my body weak.“Are you that eager to see me get married?” I asked after we kept the shopping bag aside.“It's not like that, I'm just happy,” she explained. I could see her expression it's like she's holding back herself.“You know, I'm not leaving you and Mom forever, we will still be getting in touch.” I reached for her hands, squeezing them.“I know, I will surely miss you sis Farah” a lone tear fell from her eyes. knowing how my little sister is, she can't hold on for too long. pulling her In for a hug, I rub circle on her back.“I will miss you too, and Mom too”F A R A HI can't believe I'm getting married today, it feels so surreal. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, dressed in the Ash Abaya, my face decorated with makeup, with henna on my both hands. I touched the gold bangles on my hands Mom gave me that papa has been keeping it for my marriage. I look totally different. A small drop of tear roll down my cheeks I wish papa was alive to witness this day, to see his daughter getting married.The door flung open revealing my Mom dressed in her beautiful purple Camisole gown. I wiped off the tear not wanting to spoil my mom's mood she's very happy about the marriage. She trekked towards me, with a smile on her face.“My daughter you look beautiful, I know if your papa was still alive he will be happy too” the tears I've been holding escaped.“No Farah, don't... It will ruin your makeup” mom said wiping off the tear with her palms. I can't help it.“I will miss you” she added.“I will miss you too Mom” just then Yasmin came in clearing h
F A R A HI woke with a neck pain due to uncomfortable position I slept in. checking the time on my phone showing 7:00am I miss fajr prayer. I made my way towards the bathroom, glancing at the now empty bed. Last night event ran through my mind. I felt something warm dropping from my eyes, I wiped it off not wanting to remember his words but my mind keep recalling it.This marriage means nothing to meAfter spending almost fifteen minute sitting on one position, I managed to take my bathe. I felt much better; I prayed salatul fajr which I missed.I went down to greet my in-laws, aunt Khadija and uncle Abdallah are seated across each other while Jawad is seated in one of the chairs beside uncle. His face shows nothing just blank.“Good morning aunt”“Good morning Uncle” I greeted them trekking to the dinning.“Morning Farah, you can call me Mom, get sited” she said.I glance at jawad whose eyes is on me indicating me to act normal like he cares.“Here” Aunt placed two toasted br
F A R A H“What the hell are you doing here” he roars one look at him and you'll know he's very angry ready to explode.“I...I...was” I stuttered finding the right word to way. The words choked on my throat when he took a slow step towards me grabbing my wrist. “You're hurting me please...ja-” I tried to free my hands from his hold but it seems my words were in vain, he lead us to the bedroom pushing me, my hands landing on the hard wall, I wince in pain due to the tight hold on my wrist.“How dare you enter that room" he seethed. “I...was just exploring” I managed to say without looking at him.“Exploring what. You don't have the right to go around my house exploring, stay within your limit, you're nothing but an obstacle in my life” my head snapped to his direction hearing his bitter words. I felt something tug in my heart.He took a predator step toward me, pinning me against the wall his face few inches from mine, pure hatred on his face.“I'm sorry Jawad” I stammered feeling hi
F A R A HIt's been a week since our marriage but nothing changed between us. First, he leaves without eating breakfast, and comes back late, eats his dinner change his clothes and sleep, I wonder if he even prays. He doesn't even care about me, or how I'm doing. what do you expect my inner mind reminds me. But his behavior doesn't stop me from living my peaceful life, as he had already given me a piece of his mind. Since today is Sunday, I decided to make pancakes for breakfast as Aunt Fatima is not around. I know Jawad won't eat but I still prepared plenty just in case.I slumped down on the couch eating my pancake topped with strawberry syrup, my eyes dart toward the stairs hoping Jawad will come down but no sign of him. I cleared my plate putting the remaining pancakes inside the refrigerator for later.I went upstairs and took the new novel I'm reading, which of course belongs to me not from jawad library. Reading makes me forget all my worries, I'm halfway through the book when
F A R A HThe rays of the sun woke me up from my deep slumber, I slept in the same place Jawad left me yesterday. The room was quite only the sound of birds chirping.I literally walked to the bathroom and took a hot bath to soothe my aching body. I dressed into a simple black legging with a white baggy top and tied my hair in a bun wrapping my hijab on it.My eyes roam to the bed finding it clean exactly as it is yesterday, it means Jawad didn't sleep in the room. I ignore the pang of hurt I felt, brushing off the thought of Jawad I decided to make myself some breakfast since aunt Fatima is still on vacation. I stood in front of the fridge contemplating what to make, I decided to make some pancakes with hot chocolate. I set my plate on the dining ready to devour when I heard sounds of footsteps, I don't have to be told who it was because nobody is living in the house apart from me and Jawad. Ignoring him I continue devouring my food.fifteen minutes later, I was done with the little
F A R A HOne week laterI was sitting on my desk, working on the piles of files jawad....no Mr. Jawad dumped on me. The day I resumed work, I've been working like crazy. He's been giving me a lot of work, I know he's doing it intentionally to provoke me but I tried not to show my weakness. After what happened one week ago I decided to forget everything and focus on my work, I won't let him get to me.FlashbackWhen I heard the loud bang, I literally ran to check hoping nothing happened but what I heard made my eyes widen in shock. There stood Jawad, his phone pressed to his ear talking to whoever I don't know. “I'm telling you, man, I'll have to tolerate living with her, I don't know what my parent sees in her, she's clearly not the type of girl I want as a wife” “That's the problem” he laughed at something whoever is on the phone said. A lone tear fell from my eyes, I quickly wiped it away. Be strong Farah. I know I'm not supposed to feel this way, he clearly told me his intentio
F A R A H By the time I went back to the office, I asked precious to give him the file as I'm not ready to face him again at least after what happened. When I told her about the resignation she was surprised and angry at the same time, although I didn't tell her the whole reason for my resignation. “Oh, Farah. I'm going to miss you” she engulfs me in a hug.“You're a good secretary, he's going to regret letting you go, I will make sure of that” she folded her hands in a fist squinting her eyes a bit.“I will miss you too, and don't worry he's going to find another secretary who is better than me” I wiped off the lone tear that threatens to spill from my eyes.“We will get in touch right?” She asked breaking the hug.“Of course we will” precious is indeed a nice friend. I didn't encounter any problem while working with her.After packing my necessary things I bid her goodbye glancing towards his door. Just then the door creaked open revealing the boss itself. our eyes met, it was as
F A R A HThe morning rays of sunshine erupt through the window making me walk towards the window to take in the bright sunshine. I stood like that for 20mins before I sprinted off to the bathroom.I took a hot shower to soothe my body, sleeping on the couch always leaves me with an aching body. taking out a simple sea green gown with a matching hijab, I applied hair cream which is almost finished I need to do some shopping later, I thought. and a little lip balm to prevent my lips from drying.descending downstairs spotting Jawad dressed in a T-shirt and black pants, drinking a cup of Allah knows what coffee or tea. He looks more handsome in them, what are you thinking Farah. I mentally scold myself.“Farah dear, I was just about to call you,” Aunt Fatima said. “Come sit”. she ushered, I took the seat opposite Jawad, who is busy eating his breakfast without sparing me a glance.“Here” she placed a plate and a cup of hot tea in front of me.“Thank you Aunt” she nodded in return smilin