MARIANELLA
I did not get a good night's sleep, if at any time that night I could actually sleep at all.
I tossed and turned, waiting for sleep to come, but it did not come, and when I got up it was still dark, a little after five in the morning.
I wish I were in the habit of doing some morning exercise to discharge energy, but my sedentary spirit wouldn't allow it, so I brewed coffee and drank it.
I am on my third cup.
No one should drink this much coffee, but I didn't truly feel like a human being without a dose of caffeine that is considered a food crime, it's a mania I pulled from my father.
I thought about my childhood and how different things were here from there, when I moved I had to abandon some old habits, besides the accent that only appeared in a few moments, I adapted as I needed to and this meant leaving a big part of myself behind.
I grew up in a small house, but very comfortable and cozy, so we chose to have an apartment here, it reminds us a lot of our home in Spain, we have a certain attachment to some of these memories.
Esmeralda still demands her strong accent from the four corners of Seattle, I have gotten used to being more discreet about it, I constantly deal with high ranking people who need to understand my words well.
At first it was very difficult, I was a mess with terms, I was always very confused by the speed in which they spoke, but with practice and a little discipline, I have definitely become a Seattle girl.
I put the cup aside and break the eggs by pouring them into the pan next to the bacon, I am not the best cook in the world, but being in the kitchen keeps my anxious head busy, and also someone in this house needs to be able to provide decent food, since my sister can't even turn on the stove without causing a large scale accident.
The arrangement is that she takes care of the housekeeping and I take care of the cooking, it has worked well so far, I mean, our apartment hasn't become a clutter zone and we haven't blown up the kitchen either, I consider this a success.
Mamá should be ashamed of this fact, she is a cook, one of the best in the family, with my father's help they opened a restaurant that may not be five stars, but it was an achievement that kept my family going for a long time.
We grew up around the cooks, learning everything they could teach, but knowledge in theory is very different from practice, Esmeralda is a great example of this.
She has no notion of salt, and using two or three spices is a lot, and I know she hates things like this, housework causes her an aversion, keeping the house clean is already a big deal for her.
I left everything ready and went to the shower, I had time, I took the opportunity to wash and dry my hair, I would not have that time at night.
I return to the kitchen closing the buttons of my shirt and find my sister with her body leaning over the counter, her hair unruly and her eyes squeezed with sleep.
“ Argh! It should be a crime to wake up so early “ she babbles, yawning soon after.
“ Unfortunately we are not born millionaires “ I give her a pat on the back for moral support.
“ Dios mio, just imagine Nella, the two of us as socialites, worried only about what kind of cutlery to put on the table for the charity party we are promoting “ she stands up leaning her head on her hands as if she were dreaming.
“ No, I wouldn't like to lead this housewife life, I would like to be someone successful and important, to have enough money to live traveling and enjoying every place in the world”.
“ That would be perfect too, think, if you want Italian fashion then you just take your private jet and go get it”.
“ Exactly, I didn't want to be a rich slave to work, I wanted to be free, what's the point of having lots of money if most of the time you are stuck at work?”
“ Where would you live if you could move right now? “ he asks defiantly, we have been doing this since we were children.
“ Paris," I say with a passionate sigh.
I really love everything about that place, I have been dreaming about seeing it since we were kids, I would give anything just to step foot there, it is a dream with all my heart.
“ I don't know, maybe somewhere with a beach, I never thought about it, but I would love to live in a place where I could open the windows in the morning and say good morning to the sea”.
“ Sounds just like you," I smile in agreement.
“ That, or maybe I'll go to Las Vegas and go every night to the casinos, ripping money out of those dumb old asses, what do you say? “ her eyebrows waggle with enthusiasm.
“ I'm with you mate, I can distract them while I look at your cards and make room for you”.
“ Yes “ she almost screams, her hand pulling the breakfast plate closer “ That's what I'm talking about! Who cares about honesty? Let's just improve our lives without caring about the methods”.
“ We need someone to protect us, to come to our rescue," I point my finger at her as if this is something very important in our fictitious plan.
“ This would be a security guard completely manipulated to our side “ she blinks and I laugh.
I love this, being with her, my sister is my favorite person in the world and I would do anything to see her smile.
This is how I spend my early morning, with her, a half-eaten breakfast made in an early morning burst and failed plans on how we will get rich using easy but illegal methods.
We don't even look like adults at this point, and this is my favorite part of the day, being able to forget who I really am.
The next thing we knew, she was already super late for her shower and I had to take my ass out and try not to be late, so I blew her a kiss in the air before she ran into the bathroom cursing everything and everyone, going to work next.
When I stepped into the company building, my heart beat fast, the feeling that it would be my last normal day in this place, I greeted the employees with a short smile and got into the elevator facing Dante.
I mumbled good morning and received a nod in response, I don't know if this makes me worried or relieved, he is not the kind of person who keeps his mouth shut and especially not in front of me.
Which makes me think that maybe he knows something, it makes my muscles tense, every floor that the elevator passes I feel as if needles are pinching my skin.
I hate feeling judged, no matter who it is by, it leaves me feeling that no matter what I do, I will never be good enough.
When the elevator stops at the eleventh floor, Dante turns his back on me and leaves without saying a word, this ends up sounding an alarm in my head that there is something strange going on.
When it's my turn to go down, I pass the reception desk and Karen is looking at me like the cat in the boots, I know she's sorry for what happened yesterday, but I'm not going to tell her that, let her suffer a little.
“ Was everything okay yesterday? “ she asks me, so low that I can hardly hear.
“ No thanks to you, traitor," I mutter bitterly, " What kind of friend puts another in that kind of trouble?”
“ I am so sorry! I was in shock, I couldn't say anything”.
I understand her, he seems to have that effect on people, intimidation.
“ Well, it's all right, after all “ I swallow everything else.
“ That is such a relief! “ Karen smiles.
“ I'm still upset about it," I hold my nose up.
“ That's too bad, because I could have one or two handmade chocolates that you like.
You are not only a traitor, you are also a manipulator”.
“ Upset? Who's upset?”
She laughs and reaches into her purse for two bars of handmade chocolate, which to me is better known as a calorie miracle.
Last month I bought several of these to drink with wine, it was my favorite pastime on Saturdays, movies, popcorn, handmade chocolates and a few glasses of wine.
I ended up turning Esmeralda into an addict in the process, every week she throws forty dollars in my hand and says I will only walk through the door if I have a basket of chocolates in my hand.
“ You saved yourself this time, only because of the chocolates," I squeeze my eyes in her direction.
“ I'll make sure there isn't a next time”.
I go to my desk and have already found a bunch of documents that I couldn't organize yesterday, let out a loud sigh and start working.
I don't know if I am so productive because I am a good employee, or if I am avoiding being available to my boss, but I don't stop for a single second.
I find some time to put a natural sandwich in my stomach during the fifteen minute lunch I have given myself, then I am assisting Roman with the afternoon meetings.
Unfortunately this part I couldn't avoid, he also didn't take much notice of my presence, everything seemed normal to him.
I admire this ability to ignore the world around you, I would love to achieve this, but I can't simply ignore things when they are by my side most of the day and talk to me when I need something.
I made it back from the meetings without too many neurons missing, I turned my brain off as soon as they started talking, I am good at organizing and keeping everything in order, nothing gets past my eagle eyes without me noticing that something is out of place.
I am great at keeping a system running, almost like quality control, scheduling, confirming and reviewing, it is what has kept my head safe in this company, what I have offered in disasters I have made up for in efficiency.
I think deep down my boss knows this too, I think it is part of the reason we will be going to dinner.
I spend some more time finalizing and printing some documents for tomorrow's meetings, and as I am stapling together the last stack of projects, the door opens and I freeze.
He appears in my field of vision and checks what I am doing.
“ Are you ready? “ he asks simply.
I think about it and come to the conclusion that I need to go to the bathroom to check my appearance.
“ I need a few minutes," I answer without much emotion, when in fact I am swallowing it down my throat.
“ Great, that's time to make one last phone call," and with that he drops out of sight.
I take advantage of this to grab a necessaire from my purse and fly to the bathroom while I can, luckily when I find the mirror, I don't feel like a complete disaster, my black tube dress is suitable for the occasion and my hair stays neat as much as possible.
I end up just touching up my mascara, my lips that used to be natural now have an open red, which somehow enhances my eyes, making me look more predatory.
I don't know how long I am overcome by cowardice, but I spend more time than necessary curling my hair, as if there could be some miracle there and my life would change completely.
I check the time on my wristwatch and realize that I am fifteen minutes locked inside the bathroom postponing the inevitable, I take a deep breath before gathering my things and the shred of dignity I had left and leaving the bathroom.
I almost fall back when I see Roman leaning on the hallway wall, one of his hands holding my bag and the other typing frantically on his cell phone, he looks very focused and serious, which makes you look very sexy.
I curse my brain for this kind of thought.
“ Do you think it's a good idea to go out together like this? “ I ask, pointing my head toward the corridor where the employees would be.
“ I couldn't care less," he says with that creepy coldness.
He starts to move and gives me a nod for me to follow him out of the building just like that, side by side, until we reach the restaurant, where the conversation I have been dreading all day would take place.
MARIANELLAWe came in his car, he usually uses his drivers and security guards, but today he didn't, I sat in the passenger seat and kept quiet.Not that I could speak, the sight of Roman driving seemed so eye-catching, it's no big deal, but on him it looks so masculine, I just discovered a new hobby by accident.He was so focused that maybe my presence went unnoticed, this innate confidence that my boss uses to handle everything is almost suffocating considering that I literally feel like a prey heading towards its predator.We stop in front of a restaurant, which I wouldn't normally go to alone, my salary doesn't support this kind of fun, not even if Esmeralda and I were to get together to pay for it.He unbuckles his seat belt and gets out of the car, just like that, without saying anything or waiting for me, I quickly unbuckle myself and force my legs to stick out, I won't give him the luxury of witnessing more nervousness than is stamped on my face.I watch as he throws the key t
MARIANELLAOn Saturday, the day after dinner, I woke up in a strangely good mood, with enough energy to tidy up the house, prepare the food, and have some time to sit on the veranda to study about business plans.I close my eyes as the refreshing breeze hits my face, the day was in very pleasant weather, I took the opportunity to prepare a cup of passion fruit tea, my favorite.The more I read about how to run my own business, the more enthusiasm builds up in my veins, I have waited so long for this moment.When I left my parents' home, I went to Seattle University to study fashion design, while Esmeralda went to study literature, only unlike her the doors didn't open so easily for me, my first job didn't work out and my life turned upside down.I still have traumas related to my boss from that time, I had weeks of hard work on the designs I prepared for that season, she took them and put them as if they were hers, my name was not included in anything, I never felt I had so little val
MARIANELLAMy sister is finding this whole idea wonderful, she said that I won the lottery, that I went for copper and found a diamond instead.I knew she wouldn't be against the idea, when I asked her if it would put me in the role of a profiteer she freaked out and said."Who cares? He's a millionaire it won't be missed by him, don't be an idiot to lose it."I try not to put my morals on the field because if I do, I'll end up coming home and marathoning some depressing romance series while feeling like a terrible person.Instead, I'm positioned right in the lobby of my building, endlessly researching inspirations for high society clothing, most of which I don't really like, I'm also not much for prints, I rarely wear them, which limits my path a lot.I have always been a woman of neutral tones, those that go with everything or that are basic enough to be worn alone, like black, beige and red.My current wardrobe is even a bit dull, but before all this I didn't see a need to invest i
MARIANELLAI am in a five hundred dollar cobalt blue velvet dress as Esmeralda makes a point of reminding me from minute to minute, sitting in some strange place that appears to be a nightclub, staring at the glowing ring on my finger as I swing my drink.I was convinced that I deserved to go out for a while and unload, yesterday I had a full day loaded with emotions that I wouldn't know how to put out, not that today was any different.Roman's advisor was determined to teach me a few things and explain what I should expect from now on, since the first news of our relationship had come out in a gossip magazine, it became as real as ever.I was also working on making my file with important information that my fiancé should know about me, besides trying to control my own family going crazy with the news, I received calls and messages all afternoon and from every type you can imagine."GIRL, YOU DEFINITELY IMPRESSED ME.”"For someone who had no plans to get married, you have caught the b
ROMANDuring the next week everything seems chaotic, I have been worrying about keeping everything under control since Marianella seems on the verge of a rage, even if she doesn't show it, I can feel her stress coming out in the form of smoke from her ears.If anything, she has been putting up with the heavy lifting, she no longer goes out unaccompanied because she now has reporters on her tail, it's sudden and shocking news, so until the rumors cool down, all I can do is keep her under supervision.We are a few days away from traveling to spend the weekend with her family, and literally racing against time, she has been working triple time, I never see her standing still, no matter how much she tries to hide it, she is trying to lighten it for my side.Now I also have another tightness in my ass, the kind that I can't get rid of easily. My mother.She naturally heard about it from the news that has been spreading like an epidemic, and now I get at least twenty calls a day from her, w
MARIANELLAWe were packed and ready to fly, it is a Friday morning, as the flight from Seattle to Valencia - Spain is 14 hours long, and we need to be there for the first family dinner.Needless to say I am a nervous wreck about it, I could hardly put anything in my stomach over coffee, unlike my sister who almost swallowed everything she saw in front of her.She is eager, smiling like never before, I don't know if she is already playing the happy girlfriend since now, or if the idea of facing our family puts her in such a good mood like that.For me, I would have put on the first outfit I saw in front of me, we are going to be stuck for hours on the private jet, I wish I could be comfortable, but this is apparently the biggest blasphemy in the world for my sister.She promptly rejects the idea and looks for something fancier among our clothes, which really should be mine, but my sister is getting her hands on half of everything.Now I am in a beige dress that is tight, but not tight
MARIANELLAThe huge jet was scary to look at, it could easily fit my whole family in it, the door was open and the ladder laid out for us to climb up.A man that I recognize as Roman's security guard walks up to us and helps us with our bags, he told me that I could go first, because Roman was waiting for me.I walk up each step with wobbly legs, this is going to be my life for a while and I am definitely going to get used to it, this is the worst part, the fact that this in my stomach is excitement with these new experiences I am having.Roman is sitting in one of the armchairs, he is again in a casual style that still looks formal and elegant, his social shirt is rolled up to his elbows, he doesn't look tense or worried, while enjoying a cup of coffee.“ Come, sit here," he says casually, his vibrant and strong voice causing me to move my legs to sit in the armchair next to him.“ How was the meeting? “ I ask to distract myself from the fact that he is looking at me like that again.
MARIANELLAThere are several cars parked in front of the entrance to the house, the lot is quite large, enough to almost look like a mansion, I can even hear their conversation, my family isn't known for being exactly discreet and quiet.Roman parks and I pull the belt out of my body with trembling hands, I wish I didn't have to be so nervous about it, but I feel like I'm about to faint.The gate is automatic, which means that no one in particular has come to open it, but it means that they know we have arrived, and must be getting ready.“ Dios mio ellos son mis bebes" I recognize the voice and automatically turn around to see Mamá coming towards us.She is quick to pull me into a bear hug, tight to the point that I can't draw breath, but I don't care, I miss this woman so much that I would stay in this hug for years, her fingers enter my hair, caressing it lightly as she used to do in her childhood.“ Mamá" I greet, releasing myself from her embrace and blowing a kiss on her cheek.