ELISE
When I opened my eyes again, it was morning. Heavy drapes still covered the windows but a few slivers of morning light had slipped through the corners.
I remembered what happened the night before from getting beaten up to my nightmare, and Gian’s comforting words before I went back to sleep. I tried to feel if I still have the heavy emotions I carried last night. Everytime I had that nightmare, I would wake up depressed. There would be a very heavy feeling in my chest, and I couldn’t get up or eat. I would cry until I could stop myself because Inay would see and worry. Then it would be dodging here until I could get to school.
But the heaviness was missing. I just wished it ran away with my injuries, because I hurt like hell. My head was throbbing like crazy, and my eyes felt bloated and on fire. It was time I took my next batch of meds.
“Uungh…” I moaned in both complaint and frustration. It wasn&rsqu
ELISEI started eating as soon as Alia landed steaming plates on the table, and I took my meds as soon as I had a few mouthfuls of food in my stomach so pretty soon, the pain I suffered from my injuries started to get dull, too. I told her what happened in between the bites and chews of my breakfast, but I didn’t tell her how the bitch ripped my dress and exposed my boobsies to Gian. I didn’t know why she often teased me about him. Okay, I knew. It was because Gian was hot and delicious. She would just gloss over the fact that Gian’s type were statuesque, beautiful women, not diminutive and small-boned like me. The fact that I was in proximity to someone like him was all that was enough for my romantic friend to dream that Gian would suddenly forget all his preferences and fall in love with me.So, even before I finished telling almost all of it, my poor friend was mad as hell. She was so angry that she waved her spoon and fork in the
ELISEBut of course, she’s not yet done. “Wait. What did Brandon say?” she suddenly asked.I looked at her in surprise.“I knew it. He doesn’t even know,” she exclaimed. Alia had been disappointed with Brandon since a century ago. “When was the last time he even called?”“Last week. Gian actually asked for him last night and only then did I even remember him,” I confessed. And I couldn’t even hide my sadness about this.“Son of a fairy queer…”“Alia!” I exclaimed again, shocked.“Do you really even have a boyfriend?” she demanded skeptically.I slumped further into my seat. “I don’t really even know anymore.”She sat back down in her seat. “Do you still love him?”I stopped and tried to really feel what I still feel for Brandon. “I still care for him. I a
ELISEShe laughed. Loud. Between the two of us, she seemed to know—smell was what we called it—if a guy was closet gay. I wouldn’t know unless someone outed himself already or the person was a crossdresser. I didn’t have what they call a ’radar’ for it. “Yes, he smelled straight.”I sighed, relieved. “That’s a relief,” I even said. “And it’s not because I wanted him to be, but because his father is going to kill him. And I can’t believe we’re actually talking about this.” I just couldn’t picture Brandon, who exuded all-manliness, a homosexual.But as I thought more about it, I got more depressed.“So… we’re not in love with each other anymore?”She was done and the wet dishes were on the drain dish. She pulled a towel and dried her hands as she turned towards me. “Don’t be sad. It is a very good
ELISEAlia was already asleep in her bedroom when Brandon called. As I put the phone to my ear, I was distracted. I just had the call from the family, and I could still hear my mother’s frustrated crying after finding out about my beating last night. Of course, Gian felt obligated to report. It was something he thought my parents had a right to know, and he would do the right thing even if it would make him look bad.Classic Gian!But there it went, and I felt as distraught as my mother, sister, and my stepfather were as I assured them all that what they could see on the video call wasn’t as painful as it looked. I was grateful… well, it wasn’t a deadly sickness, that Anna had the flu and she acted nauseous (maybe she was indeed that after the shock of seeing my black eye?) so it wasn’t a long call. I also told them my meds had made me sleepy and that I needed to rest. Also, Anna being sick meant my mother would not catch the first ferry ride from the beach resort to get to my side.M
ELISE“Elise?”“I think we should talk,” I said quietly.There was a distinct pause there that told me he caught on to what I wanted to talk about. “What do you mean? We’re already talking.” His voice went an octave higher.“Brandon, it’s like—”“Don’t do this to me, Elise. Please,” he pushed in, voice stricken.My heart thudded in surprise. That was too fast a reaction for someone I think was just acting. Did he not want to break up?Who was going to break up with whom? I thought it was going to be you? argued the voice in my head, which again sounded like Alia’s voice.I know! Shut up and stop distracting me.“Brandon, this isn’t working out. I can’t do this any—”Then he jerked around. “I have to go. We have guests for brunch and everything is busy around here but I missed you so much I can’t not call. I miss hearing your voice, baby.”“What? Wait—”“I love you. I’ll be there when I can. Please, baby. Don’t do this.”What? No time even for a breakup? Alia-voice was dripping with sa
ELISE“Elise...” Of course, Gian looked as guilty as hell.“How did you surviveyourcall?” I asked him sarcastically.His eyes opened and closed like a fish trying to gulp in more water, and I felt vindicated. I didn’t want to know what my mother told him. The shame and guilt on his face were enough. I knew my mother was his first crush when he was barely ten or something. Well, my mom was a petite woman and went against the tall and beautiful woman he went to now, but he was very young and my mom might have been tall in his eyes during the time. My Inay could get really scary even if she wasn’t trying.I snorted, glad I wasn’t the only one who suffered my mother’s wrath.“Why are you even here?”“Mom wants me to drive you to Tagaytay. She still feels horrible that she wants to do something for you.”
EliseWe were both quiet as Mang Karding drove us up to Tagaytay. Gian got busy on his laptop as soon as the trip started while I listened to an audio book on my iPhone.But I couldn’t focus. I was thinking, not about that awkward moment I had with Gian in my room. In fact, I was overthinking something else because I didn’t want to talk about that.I pulled my earphones out and turned my attention to him. “Gian?”He raised his head from the screen of the laptop and looked at me, his eyes still unfocused as if he was still on the report or whatever he was reading there.“Can you come with me tonight to the Schultzes?”“Is it going to be a personal visit or—”“I wanna break up with him.”His eyes focused on me.“If he’s there, then he’s lying to me, and there is no reason to think he’s not doing that for a long time now. He knew I wanted to break up with him but he’s avoiding me.”He let a few moments pass before he spoke carefully. “I’m sorry to hear that. I had hoped he would be a goo
Elise WE continued to walk. The house was getting nearer.It was a three-story rustic-designed house constructed in both wood and bricks and looked both pretty and a little imposing at night. I appreciated the design despite how I felt about its owners at the moment.I trembled from the cold again.I felt his arm land on my shoulders to carefully pull me to him to share his heat in a brotherly manner.“I’m here,” he started softly, “not only because you haven’t been here before, okay? I’m here because I got your back.”“I know.”“Good.”“It’s not going to be that hard,” I said after a moment passed, and it was heavy with things that didn’t need to be said.I always knew I had his back. That, I could never doubt even if I tried.“It’s not like it’s a sudden and impulsive decision. I’ve been thinking about this for a while now. I should be grateful this is the only reason I was breaking up with him... that he’s away so many times and for too long that I’ve fallen out of love. It’s… at l